Edwin Jarvis (
edwinjarvis) wrote in
driftfleet2016-12-30 03:42 pm
video.
Who: Mr. Jarvis and you!
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Marsiva
When: Today!
[The video begins with a fellow in a well-pressed suit and a carefully adjusted tie, all befitting someone who puts the most care into looking a well-kept part in society. His poor hair could do with some pomade - it hangs a bit, droops like a wilted leaf on his forehead, but otherwise he's made sure to keep his dignity in the wake of this... horrible event. He's been clearly kidnapped. Kidnapped! He prays Miss Carter is safe somewhere; the last thing he remembers is being hit with a tranquilizer, but he can't seem to remember if it had been a terribly dangerous affair. Didn't they have the assailant in their trunk? Oh, what a beast the man had been. He will attempt to keep his composure regardless. It's his job.]
While I appreciate that you've let me keep my reading glasses, I'm afraid I won't be broken in by such... backwards methods. Whoever you are and wherever you have... taken me, I can assure you that you've chosen a terrible person to kidnap and that kindness will earn you nothing of use. I'm just the butler; a chauffeur, and I'll have little to offer you, unless you would like to learn how to properly fold any and all manner of clothing.
... Or how to properly prepare a dining table.
[I imagine nothing of that sort will interest you, you're probably all thuggish barbarians.]
If you think you'll get anything at all from me otherwise — well!
[He folds his arms, and though he's concerned for his health in the future (god please don't murder me whoever you people are), he is doing his best impression of an impassive, dry-witted butler. As always. He doesn't sell it perfectly, but at least he's selling it, and that's what matters. Look how tough and unbreakable I am. Can't hurt a butler when he's down.]
You're sorely mistaken.

[........ brb fumbling now]
How do I turn this thing off?
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Marsiva
When: Today!
[The video begins with a fellow in a well-pressed suit and a carefully adjusted tie, all befitting someone who puts the most care into looking a well-kept part in society. His poor hair could do with some pomade - it hangs a bit, droops like a wilted leaf on his forehead, but otherwise he's made sure to keep his dignity in the wake of this... horrible event. He's been clearly kidnapped. Kidnapped! He prays Miss Carter is safe somewhere; the last thing he remembers is being hit with a tranquilizer, but he can't seem to remember if it had been a terribly dangerous affair. Didn't they have the assailant in their trunk? Oh, what a beast the man had been. He will attempt to keep his composure regardless. It's his job.]
While I appreciate that you've let me keep my reading glasses, I'm afraid I won't be broken in by such... backwards methods. Whoever you are and wherever you have... taken me, I can assure you that you've chosen a terrible person to kidnap and that kindness will earn you nothing of use. I'm just the butler; a chauffeur, and I'll have little to offer you, unless you would like to learn how to properly fold any and all manner of clothing.
... Or how to properly prepare a dining table.
[I imagine nothing of that sort will interest you, you're probably all thuggish barbarians.]
If you think you'll get anything at all from me otherwise — well!
[He folds his arms, and though he's concerned for his health in the future (god please don't murder me whoever you people are), he is doing his best impression of an impassive, dry-witted butler. As always. He doesn't sell it perfectly, but at least he's selling it, and that's what matters. Look how tough and unbreakable I am. Can't hurt a butler when he's down.]
You're sorely mistaken.
[........ brb fumbling now]
How do I turn this thing off?

no subject
We should make it a project. After all, there's far too much free time out here, I can already tell. And... though I have no idea what ship I'll end up on, I imagine it's not any more captivating.
no subject
That sounds like a fun way to spend some time. I'd love to help you.
But might I ask your name?
no subject
Edwin Jarvis, though most simply refer to me by Jarvis. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance.
[Even if it started with you giggling at me. B^|]
no subject
[Giggling and lying - what a great way to start a friendship.]
And I think manners can be forgotten a little considering how stressful your situation is right now.
no subject
And I appreciate your kindness. I imagine it must have been quite a shock to you as well, arriving here.
no subject
[But let him tell you, getting stuck in a toilet stall for a few hours? Not fun.]
Everything here is so strange. Like the "electricity" thing, and all the metal. I'm still learning it all.
no subject
[:^|a Please don't die in space, sir.]
Electricity is new for you, is it? Hardly a seasoned veteran where I'm from as well; when I was a small lad, we still had quite a lot of gasoliers ourselves. My granny had always done her nightly reading with a gas lamp to see by! One of the small things youth these days take for granted.
Americans are very oblivious if they think Edison invented the light bulb, though.
[jarvis you're making yourself sound old]
no subject
It is very new. I still don't understand how it works.
[As in, he still has no idea what a 'gas lamp' is either??? What gas???]
We used candles and oil, if one were rich enough to afford it.
[He pauses for a second.]
What is an "American?" [A second pause.] And light bulb? Is a seed for light?
[Now who's old?]
1/2
[Oh goodness gracious me, he's very old. Old as balls.]
no subject
no subject
Oh....so they're the things in the ceiling.
[He glances up above him for a moment, contemplating the fixtures there. Having a name for them is just another tidbit of information to add to his ever-growing repertoire of stuff he will never understand or care to understand. But it's nice to know.]
Interesting. But what is an "American?" You didn't explain that part.
no subject
Yes, correct!
American is -- well, usually it refers to someone from the United States of America.
It's a country located in North America. We're an ocean away, actually.
no subject
....
[And Jarvis has lost him again.]
I'm afraid my country only just opened itself to the West, Jarvis-san. Other than China and the Dutch, we haven't had much interaction with anything until the Black Ships came.
no subject
[:|a]
I look forward to learning more of your time regardless.
Since we'll be fleetmates... Is that the correct term? Fleetmates?
no subject
Indeed I am.
And I suppose that would be the correct term? I'm a samurai, not a naval officer though so I wouldn't know. Let's go with fleetmates for now.
I look forward to learning about you as well.
no subject
I'll have to make you a proper cup of tea and some biscuits then.
no subject
Good luck with your new crew, Jarvis-san. Please be well.