driftfleet | Just Keeping Swimming

[Sorey feels that slight tug of resistance to the idea before Mikleo gives in, allowing himself to drift along with Sorey. While everything might've made Mikleo even more pragmatic than ever, for Sorey he's needed to force himself to imagine happier endings, to envision a time that isn't consumed by the Shepherd's duty simply because, even before arriving in the Fleet, Sorey had begun to realize that even after the fall of Heldalf, the Shepherd's duty might not ever actually be finished. He really hadn't realized the scope of what he'd done by accepting the pact in Ladylake, just as Mikleo had always thought they could just walk away from it.

Sorey can't walk away from it anymore. On the one hand he doesn't want to, not ever, but on the other he feels to some degree that he's robbed Mikleo of the kind of life they'd always wanted together. Exploring ruins, combing libraries, meeting with scholars across the world. Satisfying their thirst for adventure and knowledge and each other, slowly finding their way closer than just friends, just partners.

Maybe they can still do this. Maybe.

Sorey smiles at the pulse of fond exasperation from Mikleo at that assessment because that's honestly pretty true too. If the opportunity had come up, Sorey would've jumped at it. Even if he knew what he knows now, he'd have done it. He just wouldn't be able to turn away and leave it to someone else.]

I guess you're right.

[Reluctantly, anyway. Sorey finally eases a little back into the driver's seat, rolling them over more and kicking off of a current to make for the fluttering kelp forests nearby.]

Our adventure is a lot different from what we envisioned, but we've certainly learned a lot more than we ever thought we would. [For better or worse.]

[For better or worse is a good way to put it, after everything. Mikleo tries not to let that thought show too clearly, but it's hard to hide from the armatus, and Sorey's being honest, so he knows he ought to do the same. It's been a struggle for the both of them, and there's no hiding that. This, though- the armatus, two bodies joined at last as one after so long, this sense of peace and liberation that he'd missed so terribly, like a piece of himself had been carved off even though he'd been whole on his own- it's a blessing. A gift, one they've both earned.

More better, less worse, he thinks, and he shares the sentiment freely with Sorey instead, earnest and full of joy even through the lingering sorrow. The difficult journey they'd been on back home, the trials they'd faced together, and even here, falling to darkness, dying. It pales, all of it, compared to what they have right now. He has no reason to regret the choices they've made.]

I'm fine with that. I got what I wanted, after all.

[He joins his own degree of control alongside Sorey's, allowing Sorey to direct them, optimizing the way they move through the flow of the water, twisting their body into a self-indulgent spin just to feel the current in all directions, to watch the feathers and hair curl and unwind around them. The water is unfamiliar and their fingers spread to let it flow freely between, a welcoming handshake to the wealth of nature surrounding them.]

[Here on this water planet, it's a little like how being on the ringworld with Dezel had been if only for the spread of it. Sorey can almost feel the water as his own, almost, but Mikleo is a welcome barrier between he and that sensation. Assuming complete control over the elements- that's what the hellion had did. Sorey doesn't want that, he never really did.

They way they move through the water is faster and more graceful than Sorey ever could have on his own, but by the standards of the water armatus it's practically lazy, all drifting and fluttering circles and twirls. Sorey wonders at how much the ocean feels like its own alive creature, has the echoes of Mikleo inside of it, like he can practically hear the way his hair sounds when he brushes it back along the waves. Back home in Elysia Sorey had thought about it a lot, about what seraphim feel when they interact with the element that bore them ("Do I see or hear or feel the same things they do?") and while the Shepherd's pact has given him more insight on it, there's still so much mystery.

(He'd answered his own question, though. He doesn't, but in the end that's not really what matters.)

Sorey lets that settle, I got what I wanted, as they only half-explore the world around them, using it as an excuse to re-learn how to be together like this. The armatus is a gift that comes with the Shepherd's pact, so Sorey feels a little guilty about indulging in it like this, but he figures when the good it does outweighs the harm then there's no reason to hold off out of some strange sense of duty. Being a Shepherd isn't as black and white as he'd previously assumed anyhow.]

Got what you wanted, huh? [Sorey murmurs, brushing their hand over a few strands of kelp. The plants soak up his augmented power, leaves curling a little longer than before.] And you said you're not romantic...

I'm sure it's your fault. You have a weird way of affecting the people who hang around you too much. I dread the day I'll be reciting poetry and weeping over some fool's fictional love life...

[Mikleo scoffs quietly at that, watching the kelp grow, feeling through Sorey what it's like to affect the plant life the same way Sorey can feel the ocean through him. It's strange and somewhat distracting, so he tries not to dwell on it too much, but it's fascinating in its own way, as well. He's not quite sure what to make of it yet- sort of like dwelling within Sorey while he's using the armatus of one of the other seraphim.

He focuses back on the ocean around them, coaxing their body to turn over and float, legs kicking just enough to keep them moving. He watches the sunlight of the surface reflect against the water, rippling rays falling upon them in all directions, a kaleidoscope of colour as it bounces off the reefs, fish, and fauna that surround them. It's beautiful, and he can feel it calling him, reaching out to him.

He needed this. Not just the water, not just the armatus, but both at once- something about the combination, the reminder of their first trip into an ocean all those months ago, being with Sorey again at last in a way they were meant to be- another fragment of his wounded heart is healing beneath the depths. Another memory of their shared hell is beaten back, not forgotten, but not so important anymore.

It feels good to do this again. To share this joy, to tease and to play in the water, to be free.]

I will gladly assume responsibility for that, [Sorey laughs, surrendering control to Mikleo in a way very different from how he'd thrust it desperately at him at the start. This is more a gentle give and take, like the ebb and flow of the tides; Mikleo pulls gently and Sorey goes, and when he pulls Mikleo goes. Symbiosis. The way it's supposed to be.

The comfort Mikleo finds in their shared connection with the ocean seeps into Sorey's heart, sets so much of him at ease. He'd believed him when Mikleo had said that he'd wanted to armatize again not just for them, but for himself; still, believing it and knowing it are two different things, and here as their souls share a body side-by-side, the truth of it is unmistakable.]

This kind of reminds me when we first armatized, [Sorey muses aloud, stretching out their hand to a little school of flashing silver fish curling nearby.] We didn't get a lot of time to enjoy it though.

Right... we were in kind of a hurry, then. After the battle was over, we didn't even think about staying together for fun like this.

[He knows Sorey thinks about that sometimes - whether or not this is an abuse of the Shepherd's powers, if Lailah would disapprove - and he tries to make light of it, his voice pitched towards encouragement more than anything else. He can't imagine why this wouldn't be permitted- not when it actually works towards their goals, grows the relationship between human and seraph, makes this form feel more natural and comfortable. Knowing what he knows now, of how the world used to work, using the armatus like this feels even more important.

It's as Sorey keeps saying: seraphim aren't tools to be used. All of them, with Sorey and Rose, and Alisha too- they're family. It can't always be about work.]

Remember how surprised Lailah was? That you knew my name, I mean.

I do remember. [It had been kind of funny, even though they'd been fighting for their lives.] Didn't she say something? Like "well, well!" or something like that?

"Oh my!" [is Mikleo's response, doing his very best Lailah impression.] She was so scandalized at the time, but afterwards, she was pretty happy about it.

[She probably knew they'd end up like this before they did. She's weirdly perceptive like that when it comes to relationships.]

[dang that was a p good impression]

I guess it really is uncommon to share your name like that. It makes me feel kind of bad that I need to say it for us to armatize. [Plus it really makes him think hard about the level of trust the others showed in him when they just threw their names down at his feet like that, almost immediately after meeting him. Seraphim can see into the hearts of men indeed.]

[as they say, prime lords are prime lords!]

About that... I wouldn't worry. The trade-off is pretty fair when you consider how dangerous the world is without a vessel, and a true name only holds power if you know how to use it- otherwise it's just words. Remember when we were little and you used to chant the verses for my seraphic artes, but nothing happened? Sort of like that.

[Well, he can't really speak for the others- he'd given Sorey his name in a heartbeat because not telling him had been unthinkable. For them it must have been an incredible leap of faith. It's as much a testament to how trustworthy Sorey was - and is - as it is to their judgement.]

That's very true. [Though Sorey doesn't want to assume there aren't any humans who don't know how to use a true name for their own purposes, considering the number of undead hellions they've come across.

Hey so, like, this water is nice and all but what does the surface of a water planet look like? Let's swim up, buddy.] Though thinking about it now, Edna and Zaveid and Lailah are all really incredible, aren't they? They survived in these really malevolent places for decades without any adverse effects.

It is impressive, yeah. I thought it was hard enough just lasting a few weeks outside of Gramps' domain... I can't imagine living years like that.

[It was easier once he had something to focus on, a goal to work towards - namely, getting Sorey to stop being a stubborn idiot about things - but it's hard to describe the relief he'd felt as soon as he'd become a sub lord and became a part of Sorey's domain, able to hide from the ache of the world's malevolence inside a safe, clean vessel. Sure, it was still there, but at a manageable distance, like a beast behind cage bars.]

No matter how strong they are, it must've been nice to finally take a break in a pure vessel for a while.

...yeah. [That strays a little too close to the edge of Sorey's guilt, but he doesn't bother trying to hide it from Mikleo. While he hadn't exactly taken pride in being a pure vessel for the seraphim, he'd taken the responsibility very seriously. His failure to remain their safe haven against malevolence back in September will probably weigh on him still for quite some time.]

It also really drives home just how powerful Gramps is. His domain covers the entire mountain and forest.

[Mikleo takes note of the guilt as his mind brushes up against it, quietly forming something of a mental blanket to cover it. For comfort, but also to send a message that it's okay, that they don't have to dig into that. He knows it's there, Sorey knows it's there, and retreading it won't help either of them right now. This moment belongs to the armatus, to this shared experience, to rediscovering the good, not the bad. Maybe later, is his message, and thank you, because it means a lot that Sorey isn't hiding things.

He helps to push them onward, breaking the surface to find... oh, it's actually pretty unremarkable on the surface, landmark-wise, but it looks pretty. The sun is shining, and the water glitters brilliantly in all directions. Worth it.]

Seriously... and he managed it all without any humans worshipping him. I always knew he was strong, but now that we've seen so much more of the world, it's amazing.

[Mikleo moves on, thank goodness. Sorey hadn't wanted to let that color their experience together either, but he's pretty sure being honest with his feelings is one of the few things keeping him from generating malevolence these days.

Talking about Gramps is bittersweet in its own way, though. While he'd be terrified to see him again, at the same time Sorey can think of no greater comfort. He and Mikleo, they'd been so ready to leave home, convinced they could handle it; and maybe they can, and have, but not having that option of going back to Elysia to see everyone is a little unsettling.]

Hey, Mikleo. The second we get back home, let's go visit everybody. We can grill Gramps on all that stuff he'd never talk about before.

Heh... I guess even I'm getting homesick at this point.

[There's no denying it - even if they weren't armatized, he'd have a hard time brushing off the sentiment. It's been more than a year since they came to this place, longer still since they saw Elysia or any of their family members still living there. He misses Gramps, the smell of his pipe, the crackle of his lightning in the sky, the sounds of the forest and the water rushing over the cliff, the wind whistling over the rocks as the clouds roll by. The images flow through his mind - their mind - without restraint, joined by sadness, bliss, nostalgia, a fierce longing for home.]

I'd... really like that.

The Mikleo stamp of approval. Now we definitely have to do it. [Yeah, the surface is nice and sparkly and all but the part of him merged with Mikleo reaches back for the full embrace of the ocean. Sorey turns and dives back in, making for the kelp forests again.]

Edited 2017-03-29 16:01 (UTC)

I suppose you have to have at least one good idea if you come up with enough of them.

[His tone is as mildly teasing as ever, giving the lead over to Sorey for a while and just enjoying the ride, expertly maintaining the currents surrounding them. Their fingers brush over the flowing braids of kelp, wisps of soft leaves moving back and forth in the water as if blown by wind. It really is like a forest; this feels almost like flying, with the sun above and an endless sea of green above.]

[It's peaceful like this, the two of them indulging in nature, like when spring came to the mountaintop and they'd lay together on the grass in the sun for hours. Sometimes they'd even fall asleep, waking up to Natalie or Mason rousing them for dinner.

Sorey gives himself a moment to let the old grief for Mason wash over them before returning his attention to their winding path through the kelp.]

-oh! Mikleo, it's a crab! [Or a crablike thing. Sorey breaks from their lazy drifting to inspect the little thing scuttling around across the sand.] Oh man...so weird...

[Mikleo offers up a curious hmmm in reply, watching as it wanders about, doing whatever crabs do. It barely pays them any mind.]

No kidding. I have yet to understand why they walk sideways like that... and they always appear as though they're about to fall over.

[Flicks a surge of water at it and watches it toddle about, floating up before settling back onto the sand and resuming its scuttle after a moment of reassessment.]

People eat these, right? Sora was telling me about it. These and sea urchins and coconuts.

They eat sea urchins, too?

[That sounds... prickly. Maybe to humans it tastes better than it looks. He's equally clueless about coconuts, but...]

You should try crab, if you get the chance. It's sweet and juicy- you'd definitely enjoy it.

[Well, he told him mostly about the coconuts, but then Sorey went on to read about how people will eat literally anything they pull out of the ocean.

But then Mikleo brings up eating, and that's a first. Maybe he can tell Sorey's a little hungry.] When did you have crab? Is there a difference between freshwater and saltwater crab?

[He's a little tentative - meat is harder than any other food to discuss, and he's trying not to overthink it - but cooked crab is different from charred, mutilated animal corpses, so he's attempting to focus on separating the two in his mind. Any flashes of those darker days are muted, buried under a memory of a brilliant sun, the crackle of a campfire on the beach, waves crashing gently against the shore, skittering spider legs on the sand.]

It was the planet where we first saw the ocean- Hea-Guaa, wasn't it? Sora and I went fishing while you were off in the woods. We only caught saltwater crab, so I can't say if there's a difference, but it was good.

Ohh, I see. [Maybe Sorey can buy a few of these at the market before they leave.

He can feel the barest hint of apprehension from Mikleo at the discussion, which while much better than the strict avoidance of before is still concerning, so he turns his attention to the plants instead.] Y'know, I heard they make a lot of foods using the kelp and stuff around here. I heard they even have sweets wrapped up in kelp leaves! Do you wanna check it out?

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i'll have you know this tag got me extremely sidetracked watching crab-skittering videos

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