driftfleet | (no subject)

[ Well, you can take the boy out of Lothering ... ]

Speaking from experience after the sixth or seventh attempt it almost starts feeling personal! And not a little insulting, I might add. I mean surely if you really want to kill a person you hire better assassins than that.

[ At this point he's so animated even his hair is springing around in an absolute frenzy of drama--no, just kidding. Can a person be entirely composed of excessive mannerism and yet at the same time deadpan enough to kill all the pans seven pan-generations down? No? Hawke begs to differ. ]

Off the subject of untimely death there's every possibility we're related, by the way.

[ He just drops that at the end. Like a mic. Which is to say uh ....anachronistically? ]

Edited 2015-03-20 16:11 (UTC)

[ Stephanie chuckles a little at his deadpanning over assassins, and is about to respond with something that was probably witty when he drops that mic and whatever bit of wit she had flies out of her head

She just blinks at him for a moment, kind of... stunned, really. ]

I--

Wh--

I beg your pardon?

[ Look, it's one thing to know abstractly that you have a cousin in Kirkwall, it's another entirely for that cousin to be standing in front of you and a completely different gender than you were first informed of. ~~Dammit, Varric.~~ ]

[ It's just like Varric to incite all this kerfuffle and then be unconscious when it comes time for the fallout.

All right it's ...really not, but go with it. Hawke, meanwhile, appears relatively composed; whether or not he actually is can be considered up for debate. ]

My mother's an Amell.

[ Or uh, was. Slip-ups like that still happen; he doesn't linger on it. ]

She's the one with the brother I imagine the family tries to forget; Maker knows I certainly do.

[ Mother's an Amell, which she knows now is Kirkwall nobility, or sort of, or used to be? She's not quite clear on that front. But he sounds Ferelden... mostly. Maybe like he's been away for a long time.

Like, say, a decade. ]

You're Hawke, aren't you?

[ Sure he could be some other random Amell, but she's noticed how people tend to be connected if they're from the same world. And then the next words just kind of... spill out, more or less. ]

But Varric said you were a woman!

[ ....erm. Hawke blinks rapidly, one eyebrow zipping upwards like a marionette limb. Which is no mean feat to get him to do these days, so congratulations, Steffa? ]

Can't say I've ever gotten that one before.

[ ...what does he ...do with this... ]

Did he at least say I was a pretty woman?

[ Because I mean. ]

[ Steffa gapes for a moment, until a little laugh bubbles out of her ]

You know, he didn't say. Or if he did, I missed it being baffled why someone would rather live in Kirkwall than Ferelden.

[ Her tone is cautiously teasing - she's obviously very fond of her home, but she understands the reasons he'd stay where he was. He'd made a home there, and there was nowhere for him to go back to.

She could understand part of that feeling, if nothing else. ]

Welllllll, to get back I'd have had to take another ship, and in comparison to sea travel Kirkwall seems positively homey.

[ Naturally he is deflecting. A lot. When he'd first come to the city he'd thought once they had the money they'd probably go back, but--it didn't exactly work out that way. The obstinacy and adherence to moral code that makes no sense to outsides will mark him as Ferelden forever, but although he doesn't consider himself a Marcher, by the time he'd had to leave it Kirkwall was home. ]

So! Do I pass muster? Even not being a woman and everything.

Ah, yes. I've avoided sea travel thus far, aside from a small rowboat across a lake. I rather think I'd prefer to keep it to a minimum as well.

[ Nah, she understands. She'd initially planned on seeing if she could return to the Circle, if she survived the Blight. That obviously didn't end up happening for a number of reasons, but not least among them was the fact that it... wasn't home anymore.

Not that she herself has a home at this point, but the Circle certainly wasn't it. ]

Well, you seem like an unrespectable sort, but you're not Orlesian, so I suppose you'll do. Pleasure to meet you, cousin.

Edited 2015-03-25 02:55 (UTC)

[ Hawke's laugh is whole-bodied and totally untempered, so Steffa can mark tallies on some scoreboard somewhere. The one of 'cousin points' she is totally keeping, right? ]

No need to worry on that account. Last time I checked both I and any known associations were banned from Her lace-trimmed borders entirely.

[ Because of that whole Tallis thing. ]

Would you believe this isn't the first time I've had a Mystery Cousin materialize before me? She'd be your cousin too, come to think of it.

[ She's totally keeping a tally, sure. It's titled "times Garrett Hawke has been ridiculous either in my presence or in a way that affects me".

♥ ]

A great loss for them and you, I'm sure, though I have to admit I'm curious what you did to get yourself banned from an entire country.

[ See, if someone had told her about Charade before she met Hawke, she'd have been a bit disbelieving. Meeting him in person though... Yes, he definitely seems the sort to have multiple instances of unexpected cousins. ]

Really? How many people can say that, I wonder? Outside of our family apparently.

[ She half-stumbles over "our family", but doesn't linger on it. It's just so odd to say, she feels like she shouldn't be allowed to say it. ]

Not much loss for me! I'd already tried all the cheeses worth having. Besides it's really quite a dull tale, just a rogue Qunari assassin absolutely terrible at her job, a killer wyvern, and dozens of silly accents.

[ Maybe they are getting to the part of the conversation where they should sit down, on that note. He makes a little beckoning gesture and inclines his head; obviously they can continue familying at one another while they walk. He will uh, modulate all fifteen yards of stride for her. ]

Not too many, I suspect. I wonder if it just starts to happen after they slap a title on you.

Oh, yes, quite dull-sounding indeed. I'll have you recite it if ever I can't sleep.

[ Okay so maybe a ridiculous sense of humor runs in the family. Steffa just doesn't break hers out very often, but it's there. Waiting. Snarking.

She follows, and her tiny stature aside, she seems to be pretty good at keeping up with long-legged behemoths like her cousin. ]

That seems to be true of a lot of things. Mystery cousins, assassination attempts, people assuming you have any idea what you're doing... Get a title slapped on after your name and it's all fair game.

Oh, that's nothing. If you really want to fall over where you stand I should tell you about the time I single-handedly fought off a pirate invasion. At midnight, on the sacred ground of the Chantry.

[ He's just checking to see if Varric has told that one, and if it's received any embellishments since. Such as that he foiled said invasion while blindfolded. ]

Tell me about it. I once let my friends in circles around the Wounded Coast for three hours, and not one of them questioned it.

[ ...okay that one. That actually happened. Merrill thought he was taking the scenic route. ]

[And up Steffa's eyebrows go. Seems safe to say she hasn't heard that one yet. ]

What in the world were pirates doing in the Chantry?

[ There's another laugh, more a soft snicker than anything. ]

Let me guess: you got lost or couldn't find what you were looking for and didn't say anything? That happened to me in the Brecilian Forest, it was the better part of two hours before Natalia said anything, and I think she was the only one who'd figured it out.

I don't know. Stealing shiny things? The Chantry has plenty. Can't swing your arms without hitting a gold statue of the Maker's second favorite sacred nug or something.

[ Here is a suitable bench for them to hang out on, by the way! It's in the sun and they can peoplewatch the market. Very important. ]

To be honest I'm not sure I had any idea what we were looking for in the first place. We ended up calling it a day and going swimming, as I recall.

[ For a second he looks far away, not sad, Maker forbid, just remote. Kirkwall wasn't 100% bad 100% fo the time. Sometimes it had days like that. ]

[ Sitting on a bench people-watching with her cousin. What is her life, this is fantastic. ]

That sounds wonderful. [ she looks a little wistful ] We never really had the chance to do that. Just stop and... have fun. It was always "we have to stop the Blight, we don't have time to stop".

Though we did go swimming in Lake Calenhad while we were waiting for the army to finish arriving in Redcliffe. That was right... right before we had to march to Denerim so I think we all wanted to have a little fun before our likely untimely deaths.

That's why I make it a point never to do anything heroic. Less pressure, more swimming.

[ That is just like, blatant falsehood. Or at least a wildly simplistic version of his entire time in Kirkwall. ]

Can't say I blame you. If it were me I'd have gone into that battle as drunk as I could get.

[ ...okay that might actually be true. ]

[ Steffa laughs, and I'm just going to leave here the fact that sometimes when she laughs it would be easy to mistake the sound for Bethany's laugh.

Surely he still remembers that, even so long after losing her, right?

I'm a horrible person and I don't even care ]

Oghren certainly did, and made a fair attempt to get the rest of us to do the same. Still, even using it for magic more than arrows, bows require dexterity, which is something I am severely lacking in when I'm drunk.

[ Yes, Hawke's face goes oddly blank for a second, you monster. He hasn't heard Bethany's laugh since well before she died; all told it's been more than ten years, but the sound still slices through him like a knife through water.

If there's one thing to say about Hawke, though, it's that he's resilient, and so recovers quickly. That's easier than it might be, given the surprise that arches one expressive brow. ]

It's never stopped Varric. You don't use a staff? How does that work? Besides poorly, in my case.

Edited 2015-03-29 16:59 (UTC)

[ She notices that flicker, but it's gone so fast... Well, it's probably nothing, right? ]

Varric is likely a better shot than I am, and not nearly such a lightweight. [ little grin ]

Ah, well, we thought it would draw less attention after Ostagar. Morrigan - one of my... travelling companions [ That pause and your face are extremely telling, Steffa. Yes. Totally just a "travelling companion". ] she enchanted a bow for me to use as a focus, and it worked rather well, actually!

[ Hawke has no room to judge who people are "traveling" with, so although he acquires sort of a knowing twinkle for a second, he has nothing to contribute on the subject. ]

That is true. Varric can drink his body weight in liquid and still sink a bullseye from miles off. We should all be so talented. If you use a bow as a focus, do you have to be firing arrows for it to work?

[ Look, this still sounds really weird to him. And you can't smack things in the face with a bow! ]

[ it's not that she feels like he might judge her, more that... well, they were lovers, and then they weren't, and just saying "friend" seems inaccurate, and-- well, it's just complicated ]

I don't, actually! I carried arrows anyway, just in case, but with some practice I actually managed to just shoot... well, magic, more or less.

[ She's pretty proud of herself, clearly. ]

Maker. That sounds dreadfully overcomplicated for a simple fellow such as myself. I suppose you'll have to continue bearing the weight of manual dexterity for this family. Such as we are.

[ 'Complicated' is why this is not a romanced Hawke, so ...probably later for that. Someday! Just not this one. ]

Leaves me free to carry on being the big lummox who hits people with sticks! Everyone goes home happy.

[ Steffa tries to hide a smile behind her hand, attempting (and failing) to keep a straight face. ]

It is a burden I will bear, for the... honor of the Amell name.

[ Yeah, they're all big doofass fuckups in one way or another, aren't they? Not much honor to be had there. Ah well. ]

Speaking of the big lummox of the family, though, it just occurred to me that I don't actually know your name. I can't very well go on calling you "Hawke" when you're my cousin, it's ridiculous.

[ It's been literal years since anyone called him anything else, so the ?? that creases his brow is less nonsense than it otherwise might be. ]

Garrett. I can't promise to answer unless you shout it a few times, but there you are.