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(no subject)

Who: Natasha Romanoff + you?
Broadcast: Fleetwide, text
Action: upon request
When: now

[If Natasha thought she escaped the rumors, she's going to be disabused of the notion. The notes start appearing here and there—short and anonymous. Things like:]

Natasha has a cat named Boris.

Natasha Romanoff once killed a man in Vegas just to watch him die.

Romanoff has been lying about about her age.

[And—]

Nataasha is a lingerie model.

[That last one, it seems, comes with some evidence. Sponsor drop? Either way, a few files seem to have been uploaded to support the case.

file1
file2
file3
file4

She shouldn't be surprised those came back to haunt her, should she? The real question is if anyone will dare to comment on them.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

One, I didn't think about it. Two, that's a horrible idea to bring up.

[ communal, romanoff, communal. ]

I don't know. Seems like an okay ideas to me. Just adds a little adventure.

And unsanitary.

[ absolutely not. it'd be another matter if they had their own bath. ]

--- You realize that's probably the next rumor, right? Rogers and Romanoff discuss bedroom matters?

That one, I'm ready for. It's worth it.

[A lot more fun than some of the ones already going around. And it's not as though Peggy would be surprised.]

Not every day you get Captain America to talk about his sex life.

I am not talking to you about anything like that.

[ he won't say 'my sex life', that would just affirm it and she will never leave him alone ever again. ]

[He should just admit he likes it.]

Maybe not the gritty details, but you have to give your friends a little info from time to time.

[Or not. But she likes teasing him.]

Never knew that was the token of friendship.

[ that's a bit of a lie. he heard quite a bit from Bucky in their earlier years but still. ]

Is that a 21st century thing?

Only in some cases.

[Is this hypocritical? Probably. All depends on how you look at it.]

In your case, it is. I wouldn't be interested if we weren't friends.

Romanoff.

[ dry, dry and very long-suffering. ]

Give it up, it'll never be a conversation.

You're one to tell anyone to give up.

Point taken.

[ he is stubbornly fighting a smile. ]

Still, not gonna happen.

You know, you might have more luck if you weren't so obviously looking to brag about how happy the two of you are.

I can tell you a lot about how happy we are.

[ he reaches for another pillow, leans it on the wall and proceeds to lean against it. ]

and it still won't have anything to do with that.

[The nudges his ankle with her toe, not quite a kick, but pointed.]

So tell me how happy you are.

Very happy.

[ it's said with a grin. evidently, he's just being annoying. ]

Real specific, Rogers.

Well, it wasn't a very specific question.

[ just this face. ]

Ask one and I'll answer.

Tell me something that makes you happy. What's she do that gets a smile out of you?

Told you.

[ not even kidding: ]

She threw me off a shuttle a few days ago.

You know, I think they call that masochism.

Or a very good sparring session. We do that these days.

[ it's beneficial to both sides. he'd be grateful not to be thrown off things anymore but it is what it is. ]