003; video

[beathach]

Who: Charles and Hank + You Losers
Broadcast: Video
Action: SS Blameless
When: Right Now

[two old nerds appear on screen, unboxing a large colouring create with "Congratulations On Your One Year Anniversary!" written on the side in big, bold letters. Inside appears to be plushies of DNA, antibodies, and other related paraphernalia.

Of course, while doing this they're sharing the popular "rumors" about them out loud, for their own amusement. Or bemusement, either or]

Let’s see . . . 'Aliens stole Charles' hair.' I can’t say that’s wrong.

In a manner of speaking, sure.

What else . . . 'Hank is a beast in bed'. Hank, you sly devil.

—No comment.

Hmm. 'Hank and Charles are the perfect couple'. I think our students got a hold of this one.

Huh. I just read one lamenting our divorce.

Hold on, what’s this?

[ Charles pulls out a business card ]

Well now . . . I guess I’ll be keeping this.

[Hank's response is to burst into laughter. What a helper]

Comments

[winn]

Dude, I got this -

[ he pulls the comm back so charles could get a look of the t-shirt he's currently wearing - a simple one today, dark blue with the tagline you had me at hello world ]

I make all my clothes.

[axiomed]

[ His curiosity is piqued. ]

How did you manage that?

[winn]

Wanna come check out my workshop?

[axiomed]

[ What. ]

I mean, certainly, but you can show me from a distance. I wouldn't mind.

[winn]

It's on the Tourist, you're welcome anytime. Though, a head's up would be best just so I know to be there.

[axiomed]

Of course. Probably not right now as Hank and myself should clear up our mess first.

[winn]

Sure, it's an open invite. If it helps, I wouldn't mind taking one of those antibodies off your hands.

[ WHAT THEY'RE CUTE ]

[axiomed]

[ He softens. ]

We'll make sure to save one for you.

[winn]

Thanks, Charles. Lemme know if you need a hand, us computer repairmen gotta stick together.

[ he couldn't resist. ]

[axiomed]

[ Charles coughs lightly. ]

You flatter me.

[ Especially since he can barely operate a VCR. ]

[winn]

You're the man with the card.

[ tell him that sometimes charles, if you wanna see someone laugh themselves to death. ]

[axiomed]

I can assure you, I didn't design this card. I'm not even sure about this number.

[ Maybe on his dying day. ]

[winn]

Are you telling me I can't trust everything I read? Dammit, I already started designing a costume -

[ referencing one of the nicer rumors that have been floating around about him - that he's in fact a technopath. ]

[axiomed]

Oh? What kind of costume? All the ones I've seen are black leather or tacky.

[winn]

Seriously? Okay I am done making costumes for people if they're not showing them off -

[axiomed]

How many have you made?

[winn]

Here? Three.

[axiomed]

That's more than I expected.

[winn]

I like to keep busy.

[axiomed]

I think that's a familiar calling for all of us.

Still, I didn't think demand was so high.

[winn]

You're kidding right? Cuz, it feels like half the people I know here are superheroes.

[axiomed]

Yes, but do all of them need costumes?

[ At least he hasn't seen any in costume. ]

[winn]

Yes. [ with frustration, he's had to educate so many heroes already, it's like they all skipped orientation! ] You can't superhero in your sneakers, seriously, this is day one stuff - you need a uniform.

[axiomed]

Ah well. I'll leave that to the younger generation. I'm too old to be in spandex all the time.

[winn]

I take offense to that, my suits are all 100% spandex free. And bulletproof.