driftfleet | » we're all starstruck in september

I'd say ideally he should be keeping it on him. Just in case the right time pops up.

[Is that serious? Probably not. Not entirely, at least.]

An optimistic bit of advice, I think.

[ implying (perhaps) that it's a bit foolhardy to wait for a 'right' time. there is no 'right' time. ]

No more optimistic than buying the ring. If he has it, seems like there's a strong possibility he meant to use it at one point or another.

[And lets be real.]

The only way he was going to do that is by being ready when the opportunity presented itself.

Plus, then you don't get caught unprepared because someone decided to borrow a book.

-- Good Lord, I wasn't borrowing it. [ she huffs, as though she takes more offense at this than anything else. ] Merely moving it. We paid to have the rooms merged; the upgrade came with a bit of a need to reorganize.

Peggy, I'm not questioning why you'd open one of Steve's books. I was just playing the odds.

[Suddenly, Peggy's defensiveness is almost funny again.]

Either way.

I'd sooner be caught dead than reading Mansfield Park for pleasure.

[ APPARENTLY she is beating this dead horse. she'll blow herself out eventually. ]

I guess that's in keeping with your general disdain for fiction.

[Movies and books both, clearly. A part of Natasha wonders what Peggy would have made of Barnes reading Natasha The Hobbit on the Marsiva.]

Maybe that's why he thought it would be safe there?

Perhaps. Had he hollowed it out. Made himself a nook in the pages. But -- the bulge in the spine was telling enough.

[ honestly, she knows subterfuge isn't steve's bag. but still. ]

How could I not have a peek after seeing it?

It can't really have come as that much of a surprise. Either the ring, or the bad job hiding it.

It did. [ peggy admits -- and perhaps that's a sore point: the fact that she'd never seen it coming. she'd been blindsided. ] Not the botched hidey-hole. That was always going to be a given.

But everything else? [ a low whistle. ] It did.

[Natasha believes her, but she can't help but think that there's an element of denial there—not guessing because she didn't want to know.]

So I take it your answer is no.

Upon multiple occasions, yes.

[ because they've already identified steve as a stubborn bastard. ]

[That also isn't a surprise. Steve is stubborn enough to keep asking, and Peggy is stubborn enough to keep saying no.]

Doesn't seem like he's taking it personally.

Frankly, each refusal seems only to encourage him. [ it's inevitable. and it's exactly why steve hasn't asked her throughout this glitch -- because they both know she'll say yes, in the end, and that steals the game out from under their feet. ]

[You two have strange sex games. But that's between Steve and Peggy.]

I figure you know how to stop him from asking if you really want to.

And I may yet. [ which is dreadfully honest in and of itself. ] I haven't decided. For the time being, no one's feelings are being bruised.

I'm sure you'll figure out when the time is right.

I've been engaged before; I'm in no rush to try it again.

[ -- simple as that. somehow, it's less scary to say aloud than she'd thought it would be. ]

You should know I'm not judging.

I know. And you should know I'm not ashamed of it -- [ and therefore, disinclined to judge herself or expect the judgement of others. ] He wasn't a bad chap, really. But in the end he simply wasn't for me.

I just mean... you don't have to explain to me. It's your choice. I don't think you're making the wrong one.

[For her. For now.]

[ and in the end, nor does steve. and perhaps that's what makes the situation so comfortable: he'll check in, he'll ask, he'll badger -- but only because he's waiting for that inevitable yes. the one she feels in the corner of her heart but just hasn't quite made her peace with saying just yet. it's not a refusal he's hoping to twist into an acceptance.

and maybe that makes it easier to discuss above and beyond the glitch itself. ]

That's just it: I do have to. Explain it. [ she taps the augment. ] The difference is that you don't need it explained to you. And for that I admit I'm grateful.

Fair enough. Maybe you do need to. But I'm not asking, and I don't expect it.

[And on some level, she doesn't understand the dynamic that's exposed. Steve and Peggy's matched stubbornness suits them, and they enjoy it, but as much as Natasha enjoys some verbile sparring, this level of conflict and holding back strikes her as exhausting.]

As long as you're both happy with it, that's the important part. You both deserve that.

We are.

[ happy. and that's the gospel truth, said quick and easy and bright and happy. happy. with a flicker of a smile she can't hide. ]

Although I'm not convinced it's a question of whether it's deserved or not. But I'm certainly not complaining.

It's not. Plenty of people don't get what they deserve. Never do. That's part of why it's nice to see some people get it.

[At least for a while.]

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