driftfleet | Keep the change, ya filthy animal!

Entry tags:

Keep the change, ya filthy animal!

Who: Whoever's on planet and happens by; also one prompt closed to Anders
Broadcast: No
Action: Yes
When: Before, during, and after the attack on the cannibals
Warning: Use of dead bodies as "decor"

A. On the eve of battle

[The Tourist has had some repair work done to her in the weeks she's been stranded on the planet's surface. Whether she's space worthy is debatable, but she's certainly livable at least. Just lacking in defenses what with most of her crew off to fight for the freedom and survival of the Fleet. Hawke and Anders though, they're still not recovered quite enough to go fighting in the knock-down drag-out battle that's going to ensue which means they're left to stand guard over the silent hulk of the ship.

Even if they're injured though, they still need to defend their home, and with some discussion and careful planning, they're able to do just that.

If anyone passes by on their way to confront the Vizeri or otherwise, the Tourist is less inviting than usual. Fenris' handiwork in killing any cannibal that came within 100 yards of her has proven very helpful in Hawke and Anders' redecorating efforts. Bodies with fatal and nasty wounds are displayed all along the hull at irregular intervals, some with red smears underneath to show where they were dragged along the plating. The main hatch is shut, but before it are rows of sharpened wooden spikes, carved crudely but effectively and lashed together to form barriers. They're not difficult to navigate for a single person, but any group would be forced into single file to get at the entrance.

The hatch on the side of the ship is less formidable to look at. True, a corpse is pegged on either side like eerie sentinels, but at least there's no spikes? It's through this hatch that Wolfe can be seen moving in and out of the ship, lugging more sharp stakes out or wood in or walking around the ship using his magic to position fortifications and even summon walls of magical ice around other areas of the ship. Wolfe's face is set in a determined frown but there's a bit of a manic glint in his eyes, something that belays a mischief about this whole display.

Just be careful if you approach; there's more magic set up here than just what's used to build walls.]

B. Wet Bandits - Closed to Anders

[Twas a night on Hell Planet, and all through the ship
the consoles were quiet, without even a blip.
The corpses were hung on the hull plating with care
in the hopes that the cannibals would know to beware;
the mages were nestled and hidden in corners
biting their tongues lest their witty rejoinders
allow the trespassers in their humble abode
to find where the mages were secretly stowed.

The Vizeri were here and their boots made a clomp
giving away just right where they'd stomp
and so the two mages with spells at the ready
jumped from their places to cast spells like confetti!
Anders fried a handful with a huge burst of lightning
that the deafening sound was no short of frightening.
And Wolfe's spells hit the eyes of their cannibal foes
and a good number of warriors were were easily froze.

The two looked at each other and admired their work
but this job wasn't over so they couldn't shirk.
Further into the ship the two mages did skiff
the cannibals following, unaware of the glyph
that the healer and champion had arranged in the hall
so one by one their enemies would tumble and fall.
Paralysis, weakness, and runes to slow gait
the traps they had laid were really first rate.

The night is not over and the day is not won
there's a long way to go before work is done.
But Anders and Adalwolfe have experience in spades
of making their enemies regret running raids.]

C. "Because my staff is buried in his nervous system!"

[With so much effort put into their traps and fortifications and the battle that followed, Adalwolfe is exhausted, but happy. It all went rather well if you ask him. Neither he nor Anders ended up with any new injuries, neither passed out from using too much mana. All in all, a successful defense of their home.

There's a lot of cleanup to do, but after clearing the bodies from the halls of the ship, Wolfe is taking a snack break before starting a pyre. The bodies of dead cannibals may not be the most comfortable perch but Wolfe takes a great deal of satisfaction in getting back at the bastards who not only took several bites out of him some time ago but nearly killed his lover. He thinks he's earned his moment of vindication.

If anyone passes by on their way back from the Vizeri stronghold, he can be spotted sitting on a rock with his boot firmly planted on two bodies at his feet and another pile of at least six behind him. He waves with his free hand, the other casually stuffing a sandwich in his face like he's not sitting in the middle of the corpses of his enemies.]

Hey, how'd it go?

[Chill as you please.]

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[Yeah, Justice has relatively loose standards when it comes to desecration of the dead, though they may seem perfectly standard for a Thedosian. As long as one doesn't possess a body without consideration for who it used to belong to, maliciously mutilate the corpse unnecessarily, and one doesn't prevent them from being burned and given rites at some point, he's fine.

So when he comes across Anders' boyfriend next to a pile of corpses and burning them, Justice just nods in approval. Yes, good, they're getting properly handled.]

We were victorious. The camps were captured and the Vieziri have been routed, with the few survivors driven into the forest. I expect that the innocent residents of this planet will see little trouble from them anymore.

[Justice sounds about as stern and blunt as he always does, but believe it or not, he's actually trying to be nice. He's letting bygones be bygones for Anders' sake.]

Good. Hopefully that's the end of it and we can leave soon.

[Subdued isn't the half of what Wolfe is at seeing Justice again for the first time since he'd pulled the spirit's energy to heal Anders. They hadn't talked and Wolfe kept going back and forth on if they even needed to. Justice doesn't seem to care at all, but the whole thing sits strangely with Wolfe. It's an unhappy strangeness, tinged with a good deal of protectiveness and something else the mage can't really describe. Understanding. Kinship. It may not be entirely welcome but its there.

He deliberately takes another bite of his sandwich to stall for what to say.]

Anders is... doing better. We fought off this attack together. I thought you should know.

[Awkward...]

[Justice assumed that Anders was doing okay. He figured that if Anders wasn't, then he'd sense a lot more distress coming from his boyfriend. Justice stops himself from saying that, though, because being reminded that he can sense these things seems to be unsettling for the man and Justice is trying to avoid being any more unsettling than he has to be.]

Thank you for telling me. I will be pleased to see him.

[Justice says it in such a flat, formal tone of voice that it'd be easy to hear it as a perfunctory acknowledgement, no more and no less. But Justice doesn't say anything without utter sincerity. He is thankful that the man told him, and he will be happy to see Anders doing better after this whole mess. The latter is simply because he likes to spend time with his friend and reassuring himself that Anders is okay, and the former is because he recognizes that the other man is trying to be cordial as well. Justice appreciates the effort.

There is an elephant in the room though, so to speak. The incident of sharing power wasn't as momentous to Justice as it was to Wolfe, but it was still troubling in its own way, and worth discussing, so he'll get to the point.]

I wanted to say that if you wish to use spirits to augment your power again, I can offer advice.

[Once again, it's an abrupt and formal tone, and it could be taken as challenging or even condescending, but this is Justice's sincere olive branch, an offer of help intended only to help. He recognizes the dangers inherent in an inexperienced mage fumbling with the forces of the Fade. Sure, the man has Anders, but the perspective of a spirit can't hurt, especially a spirit that has magically assisted mages before and has seen the mistakes Anders' boyfriend made in his first desperate attempt at the magic.

But if the man doesn't want to pursue the school of magic, then Justice won't press him on it.]

[Justice doesn't know just how that offer digs at Adalwolfe. If he could call on any other spirit while here in the Fleet, he probably wouldn't get twisted in knots over it as much as he does. Justice can't know that Wolfe has spoken with Anders about this very thing and how he feels obligated to learn for the safety of others - the safety of Anders - is far more important than his own misgivings, even when the foundation those misgivings are built on is solid and braced with experience.

The ability is rare enough to only touch a small pool of mages, but what typically makes Spirit Healers rare in practice is the likelihood for possession. Anders' words echo around in his head, rattling as they've done since they were spoken. He knows what Anders meant was the novice healer may not know a demon from a spirit willing to help and make a mistake in allies, but isn't this still what happened to Anders? A benevolent spirit, a spirit of Justice merging with him to right the wrongs he can't alone, to heal not just the sick and injured but cure the problem at his gnarled roots. And... it was a mistake. Born of love and hope and every good intention and it was a mistake.

Maybe.

Because what did come of it? Suffering and pain for the both of them, certainly, but also the start of something greater, the spark that caught and carried and while it rages still in the time that Anders and Wolfe are from, the future brings actual legitimate change. Change for every mage.

So was it truly a mistake?

And even if it was, does that make this a mistake as well? He knows the difference, he knows through experience and his own upbringing even if he was never harrowed formally. He knows himself enough to know if something is trying to make him do what he wouldn't. Or at least, he thinks he does. Hubris, maybe, but can he really afford not to learn when--

Sutures on skin that should never have been pierced. Fingers bloody and slipping, trying to keep everything together, trying to keep his love together and here and alive...

Hawke exhales steadily, outwardly calm despite the raging internal storm.]

What's your advice?

When you opened yourself up to me, it was not directed and there was no warning. You opened yourself to the world and I was pulled in suddenly. It did not end badly that time because there were no demons present and I trusted that we had common cause and you would not harm me. But if I had not known who you were, I would have struggled and fled, and any nearby demons would have seized the opportunity to enter your mind.

[Justice doesn't move or blink, gaze fixed only on Anders' boyfriend. It doesn't occur to him to shift his body language to try to make himself look more relaxed. He still hasn't quite worked out non-verbal cues that would make him seem less stern and hard any time he speaks.]

You must understand that spirits are usually just as cautious about binding as mages are about possession. If you reach out to a spirit, you must give it time to decide that assisting you is worth the risk that you may turn on it. This becomes easier as you build trust with spirits that regularly help you, but in the meantime, you must be careful not to open yourself up until a spirit has accepted your invitation. Demons will not hesitate as spirits do.

[Plus, the extra time will give the mage time to gauge whether he's really communicating with a spirit and not a demon in disguise, but Justice is sure that he doesn't need to say that. In his experience, southern mages are very conscious of the risk of demonic trickery.]

Trust and loyalty will come in time, but you can earn them more easily by remaining conscious of and responsive to the spirit you are working with. Many will be entirely uncommunicative, but we can tell if a mage cares to listen.

[Basically, treat spirits like people and they'll like you more. You'd think this would be obvious, but it's a common enough mistake that Justice feels the need to mention it anyway.]

[He feels a bit like he's being dictated to, which really is exactly what's happening, but he chalks that up to why he immediately feels the need to be obstinate. He comes up with all sorts of things he could say to scratch at the irritation of being talked down to, aggressive brush-offs or even threats, snarky comments or jokes to ease his discomfort, but he knows none of those will end well. Not with Justice, and not with Anders either after he'd told his partner he would at least try to get on with the spirit.

And Wolfe did ask for this.

He exhales again slowly, measuring his response into something more diplomatic than the childish urge to yell at Justice and throw something at his head.]

I will keep that in mind, thank you. I panicked in that moment, because Anders was dying. I didn't even know I could open myself up like that, let alone how to control it. I just sort of... grabbed out in fear.

I know.

[Justice means that to be reassuring and understanding. Yes, I know. I was afraid too. It was a scary situation and I don't blame you for grabbing me.

But the way it comes out with his flat voice and his lack of additions, it can easily be taken as a condescending put down. Justice can feel that he has not put the man at ease, which makes him less comfortable speaking, which ironically makes him appear even more abrupt and rude than usual.]

We were both lucky. This is advice for the next time you do this, if that is what you choose.

[Again Wolfe has to tamp down on his initial reaction. Justice rubs him the wrong way in his turn of phrase, or rather lack thereof. He's so blunt that it always seems disapproving, always as if he's looking down his nose at Adalwolfe, the pitiful human. Wolfe has come to know that this is just how Justice speaks, plainly to a fault.]

Can I give you some advice in return?

Yes, you may.

[There is no hesitation. Justice wants to hear what the man has to say. If he doesn't like it, he can dismiss it, but it's worth it to hear him out.]

You present things in a very...

[He's trying to soften the blow, but he trails off in realizing that using the concept he's trying to convey to someone who has a fundamental lack of those emotions is akin to continually punching a wall and expecting it to fall down. He should be upfront and clear, he thinks. Hopefully his diplomatic instincts are right and this doesn't end poorly.]

You're too blunt and it can be very off-putting. There's a finesse in speaking with people. I'm sure you've noticed that non-spirits aren't very self aware sometimes when it comes to their own emotions?

[Despite what the man may or may not have expected, Justice doesn't have any visibly negative reaction. His frown deepens a little, though it's a deepening of thought rather than consternation, and he focuses unblinkingly on Anders' boyfriend's face. He's listening very intently.]

I have noticed. I have also noticed that you mortals often prefer to rely on implication or imprecise language to communicate.

[He cocks his head, still not blinking.] I find it difficult to understand you when that is the case. I realize that mortals find me off-putting, but I do not know how to fix it.

[And if the only way to fix it is to try to adopt the way they talk, Justice isn't sure he can do that. He has so much difficulty understanding it--how can he possibly ever learn to speak like that?]

You're in the mortal world, you either act like mortals or you don't, but it's considerably easier to get by if you play along. What about implications are hard? Maybe I can explain it in a way you'll understand.

[It would really be for everyone's benefit of Justice was able to figure what people mean when they don't say it overtly.]

Everything?

[Okay, not helpful.]

I simply do not understand what people mean to say when they use them. I often do not realize when they are using them at all. Sometimes their thoughts tell me their meaning, but not always. It... [Justice's brow creases as he struggles with the words. He wants to communicate clearly, but he has difficulty when it comes to things like this.] It is as though we are conversing in a language with which I am only a novice, but everyone around me is a native speaker. It is difficult to understand when a person is anything less than direct.

[It is frustrating, to say the least. And it's frustrating to be told that it'd be easier if he just acted more like a mortal, as if the thought had never occurred to him and it's just that simple. He's been struggling to learn these kinds of things as he's gone along, going to all these lessons with Riona and trying to apply them day to day, but it will never be enough. Despite this, his tone remains even when he says,] I have been working for these past months to learn how to behave more like your kind, but I am a spirit, not a mortal. I will never be indistinguishable from mortals.

I'm not saying you should be indistinguishable from us, I just mean you'll probably get along better with a more working understanding of mortal feelings.

[He leans back against one of the remaining stakes, folding his arms.]

Listen, I didn't know just how difficult it is for you. I thought you just refused because you don't deem our plights as worthwhile. Instead, based on what you've said, it's a lack of understanding on both sides. It goes a long way towards communication to explain where you are coming from instead of simply judging people. You can't assume they know what you're thinking. This is something that mortals struggle with too and that's why we've developed ways to express meaning that depends on someone else's inference instead of having to flat out say something that might be embarrassing or uncomfortable.

[A part of Justice is frustrated, hearing that he can come off so incorrectly that someone could just think he doesn’t care. He does care, and he cares so much that it hurts sometimes, and a part of him wants to go on the defensive and say so. But it’s hardly the mage’s fault that Justice is so bad at this. Justice is used to living in a world where all the other people around him can perfectly understand who and what he is at a glance, and can predict his intentions as far as they can understand his virtue. That’s not the case in the mortal world. Mortals can’t hear thoughts, and mortals don’t understand what he is, even if he tries to explain it and even if he finds spirits as a whole to be predictable to the point of tedium.

So Justice furrows his brow as he looks at the ground before he forgets the frustration and looks back up unblinking to the man’s face.]

Could you provide an example of something I say with insufficient communication of my intention?

[He’s not sure that he’ll ever be able to communicate in implication, but explaining himself more? He can do that.]

I, uh... I don't have a specific example off hand. I'm just trying to-- No, you know, it's not just your intention, it's thinking of the situation the person you're talking to might be in. Mindfulness. Like with the refugees. Someone in that situation may be stealing because they literally have nothing left. Calling them out for that may be the 'just' thing because they stole, but it doesn't make the reason for their stealing go away. He may have just been thinking 'I will starve if I don't take this food' and not stealing for the thrill of it, wrong though it may be. In that case, getting the guy to a source of food he doesn't have to steal would be the best option. Does that make sense?

[He sure hopes it does.]

[Justice is a little vague on that, since he's never had a need for food before, but he does understand that mortals need food to survive.]

The circumstances and intentions behind a wrongdoing should inform the response, yes. There is a difference between stealing for need and stealing for sport.

[He shakes his head, his frown getting deeper.]

But it does not change the fact that stealing from another person is still wrong, and should be punished or atoned for. Having a good reason for doing something wrong does not mean it is not still wrong.

[So his ideal solution for that sort of thing would be to provide the thief a source of food, but have the thief work off the value of the stolen goods for their victims.

He doesn't entirely understand what the man is trying to tell him. Does he think it is wrong to call out wrongdoing where he sees it? If that's what it takes to blend in with humanity, Justice doesn't want to ever blend in.]

No, I suppose not, but extending an understanding goes a long way. If you just tell a starving man that stealing food is wrong, then he'll get defensive on what exactly he's supposed to do to survive then. You can't offer judgement with no solution, and you can't pass it down without sympathy. People don't respond well to that, even if you're technically right.

[Adalwolfe spreads his hands as he talks, hoping this makes at least some sense to the spirit.]

People don't like to be told they're wrong, so if you make it sound like you understand why they would do something that's technically wrong, or that it makes sense they would think that, they respond much better and it slowly changes the way they think with enough repetition instead of just making them defensive so they tell you to sod off.

[This all sounds way more complicated than it should be.]

I thought that I was not supposed to unnecessarily make it clear that I can hear thoughts. Anders said that mortals do not like that.

[Yes, that's what Justice got out of that explanation. Because obviously, the only way he could possibly know the reason why someone did something bad is if they think about it and he hears.]

People do not like being told that they are wrong, and they do not like being punished or asked to atone for what they did wrong. Does telling them that I know why they did it really change that?

[He's imagining going up to a murderer and saying, "I know you killed those elves because you were drunk and you do not like elves. It was wrong and now you must die." He's having trouble believing that it would really make the mortal respond any better in that case.]

[Oh it absolutely is. Mortals are ridiculous to try and understand, even to other mortals.]

They don't, but you don't have to hear someone's thoughts to understand them. You basically have to make them feel guilty on their own for what they did, instead of overtly telling them they should feel guilty.

[It's totally what Adalwolfe does on a regular basis. Most of the time he's not really aware that's how he manages to get his point across, but sometimes he explicitly does it on purpose.]

Of course, not everyone is going to change if they feel guilty but more often than not the ones who don't are the ones who are going to attack you for bringing any of it up whether you're careful or not. And if they try to run you through, then they deserve what comes to them regardless.

[Self defense is self defense.]

[For someone so inexpressive, Justice's face does a really good question mark imitation.]

I am confused. Is the expression of understanding when people do wrong intended to be used as a means to elicit guilt?

This method of goading people into changing their behavior seems... convoluted.

[And so, so confusing. Is he supposed to pretend that he divines people's motivations from thin air, if he doesn't admit to his thought reading? And is he supposed to do this weird 'I understand why you did this thing and now because I understand you must feel ashamed' thing every time someone does wrong?

He thinks he might be coming out of this conversation more baffled by mortals than when he came in.]

Sort of, but you don't want them to know you're doing that overtly.

[When Justice puts it like that, it does seem really underhanded. But in Hawke's experience people don't know what they really need and they act out of fear and anger more often than now. If a need isn't being met, that's what need to be discovered to prevent further wrongdoing. Only some wrongdoing isn't really a big deal, but he's not sure he can express that to Justice without massive ~~rivalry~~ disapproval.]

Look, it's very complicated and it takes practice. Why don't you just start with trying to express sympathy. 'My condolences that you've stubbed your toe, that must hurt.' That sort of thing.

You want to make them feel guilty by expressing understanding, but you do not want them to know that you are trying to make them feel guilty?

This seems... manipulative.

[Justice does not think he wants to play this game. Not only does it feel deceptive, but it also feels like it requires way more social finesse than he actually has.

But he wants to be good and try to get along with Anders' boyfriend, so he'll play along if he must. So he takes a breath to speak, searching for a way to practice this whole 'expressing sympathy for minor things' thing.]

My condolences the ship was attacked by Veiziri while we were gone. That must have been a nuisance.

[Did he do good?]

Perfect! You're a natural.

[He is in no way a natural, but it's encouragement.]

Now I've got to get the rest of these bodies burnt. We can talk more later, if you like.

[Maker why did he say that? He doesn't even enjoy talking to Justice. But... well, for Anders he'll make the effort.]

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Keep the change, ya filthy animal!

C

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