driftfleet | Stick a Fork in Me

Who: Katie McCoy and you
Broadcast: Fleetwide.
Action: Vanquish, Iskaulit, Malum
When: Today!

[Video]

Just a moment--

[She'd apologise for the deafening thunk of a very solid piece of metal striking the floor in front of your screens, but she's in too bad a mood. It's the business end of a battle axe, runes inscribed along the metal edge and the weapon far too ridiculously big for a person like Katie to use. In fact, it's not temper that made her slam the stupid thing into the floor. She just can't lift it for very long, it's too goddamned heavy.

(Especially for someone who's been out cold for nearly three months, and this is what she comes back to?)]

Now. Who's responsible for this? Where did you get it?

[Anyone who saw any Tully-related flashbacks in calibrations will recognise the weapon for his. Otherwise, the runework is distinctly Scandinavian (Younger Futhark, to be precise) if there are any geeks in the audience.

...also, that's from the Atroma and it's been sitting in the cargo bay for months. Merry belated Christmas? She really appreciates it. Honest.]

---------

[In person, one can find Katie either dragging said stupid axe back to her quarters on the Vanquish, down at the fox park on the Iskaulit, or lurking at a table in Malum and getting really drunk, which is possibly not wise but par for the course.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[There's always a very good chance that he can do absolutely that.]

That's a tragedy. So, I'm guessing it has a story to it and it's not just a random useless Atroma gift?

[Hey, if he can see souls (or their absence) she has two of them. One is decidedly not human.]

It could be both. It's my very favourite paperweight from home.

[...but also, honest answers, hohoho.]

[It's definitely something he files away for the future. Probably best not to bring them up just now. She's not in a good mood and he's rather not have anyone raging in his bar.]

And here's me, only having a weird-shaped glass thing.

[They're quite comfortably curled around each other, anyway.]

Well, you can't really knock weird-shaped glass things. They're at least good for guessing games. Or hitting burglars.

I generally have other ways of dealing with anyone stupid enough to try and steal from me, but yeah, sure. I like it 'cause it's pretty.

Have you had many such stupid people?

[Let's talk about you, not me.]

Not in the Fleet, thankfully. Back home, I had one or two. Humans- they'll always try their luck even when the odds are stacked against them.

[But that's not healthy.]

Something that can be said both for and against them, I suppose. [Generally, she likes it. Blind confidence is a wonderful emotion to snack on.]

I would be entertained if they tried stealing from me once in a while.

Exactly! I'm fond of the duplicitous nature, to be honest. You can never guess what you're going to get from them.

[Katie you are fast making him A Fan of you. ]

It's very entertaining. It's that one moment when they realise they fucked up in ways they could never imagine before. Their little eyes bulge out of their heads and everything.

[That brings an outright giggle.] And do you think they learn from the experience? Or do they just learn not to try it again with you?

Well, if they turned over a completely new leaf, I think I would have been undoing the work my bosses tend to favour. You know, being generally unsavoury and all.

...Chances are that's what happened though. That's just my luck.

[Of course. Demon and all.]

I hope you manage to balance it out with other unsavoury acts, then. How are those going for you?

Like, back home or here? Because those will be two very different answers.

[No they won't.]

Perhaps you ought to give them both to me, then.

Back home is a little more tricky because I haven't been there for a while, and when I was there, the last thing I remember is the day after the aborted apocalypse.

Here? Mostly minor irritations. No point doing worse, nothing I can do can top what Atroma brings to the table.

[Which brings home the point she's drinking in the first place.]

I don't know. Perhaps you ought to try. Make it a challenge.

What? Doing worse things than Atroma does to people? Seems a little below the belt, don't you think?

[...]

I suppose so. Though it might be nice to have a person that plays mean tricks that people can yell at you face to face for.

I don't know, I have a pretty busy schedule as it is. I don't think I can pencil in the time for people yelling at me.

Oh, well, if you're busy. Perhaps I'll look into making a giant Atroma effigy instead.

That might not be a bad idea. Put it up in a common area and let people have at.

A handy supply of all kinds of goop and rotten vegetables nearby, perhaps.

[She may very well do this. It will be all your fault.]

[He'll take credit. ]

Perhaps with a few rotten eggs in there too. Just to seal the deal.

Sounds therapeutic. Thank you for the idea.

You're welcome. I do my best.

Stick a Fork in Me

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