text & action

[veilstrike]

Who: Leilani and you!
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: On the planet or Blue Fish
When: Throughout the month

TEXT

Is there anyone on the fleet with experience fighting with one hand?

A friend requires a little help.

[ The most obvious 'asking for a friend' line there has ever been, surely. ]

IN THE HOUSING AREA & SUPERMARKET.

[ For a girl that grew up in a clan where 'houses' were travelling Aravel, seeing a modern human house is almost a novel experience. It doesn't take her too long to go out of her way to pick one out, busting the lock and roaming around as she explores all the amenities. It's not a particularly big house, but it doesn't need to be when it's just her and maybe Dorian and a few others - she has some ideas - and she takes the chance to relax, to breathe, to calm down after waking back up with the loss of her arm.

If she spots anyone else milling around the neighbourhood she'll be quick to go out of her way to talk to them, ignoring the fact that she very clearly had an arm the last time people saw her and very obviously does not have one now. She'll also make her way to the supermarket and grab as much fruit as possible, sometimes even sitting in the middle of an aisle to eat some of it. It's been long enough that she doesn't really care about the impression she's making, because the fruit is far more important.

Of course, each morning you can see her busting open the lock to 'her' house again, because she's claimed it for now. If she had a big flag to slam down in the middle of it she would. There's definitely a few nights where she camps out in the supermarket to see what's going on, only to be shocked by the sudden refresh of food, frowning as she tries to figure out if there's some kind of magical reasoning behind it. ]

AMUSEMENT PARK.

[ The amusement park is what really enchants Leilani; she's never seen anything like it before and all the wild rides and exciting thrills make her appear more like a child than a woman in her mid-twenties. While she's not a particularly huge fan of the rollercoasters that leave her hanging upside down - she's been in the hand of a giant before, actually, which isn't particularly fun - she adores the rollercoasters and the quick drops, and is happy to run around and go on any rides with anyone, should she be asked.

When it comes to the games for stuffed toys... She's just on the side of being a little too honest to outright steal them, especially since she's trying to win them for someone, so she's entirely focussed on the ring toss game to try and earn her prize. It's a little bit of an awkward situation with one arm, but she does her best, tilting her head and almost squinting to make aim; half the time she's still terrible and misses, but she's doing her best and that's what counts.

If you're very lucky, you might catch her chasing after a moustached man while trying to cajole him into going on another ride with her, much to his reluctant agreement. ]

CLOSED TO JUSTICE.

[ One of the more novel things about having a house is being able to share it with someone; there's a certain shyness that comes hand in hand with sharing your space with someone who hasn't seen you half dead or shared a room with you for a handful of months. Leilani had no issues inviting Justice to stay with her, but there's something unspoken hanging between them now. They spend time together, they're intimate, they had certainly done things that cross the line between friend and more, but they've never really spoken about it.

She can remember Riona's quiet conversation about what it means to be that kind of person for and with Justice and she doesn't want to take it somewhere that neither of them are ready for, or to push for something that he's not agreeable to.

Evenings together are a wonderful novelty, and Leilani takes the opportunity to settle down in the room she'd claimed for herself, bringing Justice with her. There's an urge, she thinks, to ignore the conversation hanging between them and just kiss him again - and she does, a number of times, because she's definitely not going to get bored of kissing him - but she has to pull back, too, reaching for his hands and squeezing them gently.

Maybe saying 'we need to talk' won't be as ominous to a spirit? ]

Justice. [ Dorian would laugh in her face if he could see her. ] I think we should talk about some things.

Comments

[samahl]

[He offers her his own smile and steps instead. His expression is tinged worry.]

How... [He starts, then stops. He looks around a moment.]

I'm going to ask you some questions, and I'm not sure exactly how to make them comfortable for either of us...

[veilstrike]

Ask.

[ She shakes her head, moving forward and settling down somewhere, legs crossed under herself. ]

I'm well versed in uncomfortable questions.

[samahl]

[He can't help but half-nod and half-shrug in a 'well, that's true' sort of way.]

How long ago did you see him? How long have you been like... well... this.

[He gestures at his own missing arm rather than hers.

He also doesn't feel the need to explain which 'him' he means. He feels like there's only ever going to be one 'him' that the two of them can talk about and instantly know who they mean.]

[veilstrike]

[ Privacy is hardly commonplace when you're an Inquisitor. ]

It's been a handful of weeks since I saw him last. I've been awake on the fleet for half that time.

[ Will the mention of Solas ever not hurt? Possibly, but who knows. ]

[samahl]

[Probably never, honestly. Not for either of them, though her pain is so much different than his.

He looks away from her and sighs a bit. Rubs his nose and feels such a strange, uncomfortable mix of emotions. He feels a sense of anger he hasn't really before. Almost as if he's more angry about this happening to her than he had been when the exact same thing happened to him.

Maybe it had always been easier for him to be angry on behalf of someone else.]

Is there anything you need? I'm here if you need to vent, or... eat ice cream? Or I could get to making you something and focus on work instead? Whatever would the best for you.

[veilstrike]

[ It's the kind of pain that you cannot simply shrug off nor ignore; it hangs around her neck, quite literally, with a wolf bone necklace against her chest. Solas had been the kind of person that comes into your life and changes it completely - he had done that to her, drawn her out and made her into something amazing before ripping her into pieces and walking away.

It's hard for her to talk about the hurt, the depth of her feelings. Leilani had barely been able to manage it with Dorian and he was everything to her, another piece of her heart freely given. ]

I'm not sure what there is to say, honestly. He came, he told me everything and he took my arm. It was as I expected. [ She turns her head down to look at the space where her arm would be. ] What do you need to do?

[samahl]

[It's strange how hearing it laid out like that can make him remember it so clearly. Everything down to the pain in his arm, the grass under his knees after he collapsed from it, the way Solas had gently taken his arm and apologized for what needed to be done.

His hand moves to the upper arm of the one had had ones had the anchor in it. The shadow pain bothering him more than he'd like to admit.

He thinks, for a moment, that he could say something more about it. There's someone here who could understand what he's been dealing with more than anyone else possibly could - because she is dealing with it too. Dealing with more than it even.

He wants to provide that to her, certainly, because she deserves to have something like that. He just doesn't know if he's strong enough to ask for it in return.

In the end, he doesn't ask. He doesn't share the way her words had made him flash to a moment of vibrant memory. Instead, he responds gently but with purpose. His tone carefully designed to hide his own pain while giving her a place to share hers if she wishes. Or to ignore it entirely by focusing on the topic instead.]

Take measurements. And we could work on a design together. I want to make sure the prosthetic is functional but you should have an aesthetic that you like. I brought everything I need to start with that first step, then I can probably find some materials on this world, or at the next waystation if they don't have everything I need.

[veilstrike]

[ The pain that she feels is bone deep, settled into her as if it's now a part of her being. Every time she slips into dreams she feels as though she can reach out and find him, as if he's right there, even though she knows now that he's a world away. Sitting here, opposite Cyril, she can feel the ache of her missing limb, the familiar bursts of magic that she had been so sure would kill her, that she had been prepared to die for if it meant that she could keep her friends safe.

She remembers the grass and the water, she can remember the way he reached for her and touched her face, the press of his mouth against her own. My love, he had said, and it echoes in her ears and makes her want to cry. There's so much weight on her shoulders, heavy with the knowledge that everyone she holds dear wants her to track down the man that she loves and slaughter him.

They want her to cut out his heart as surely as he had cut hers.

Aware that it's an incredibly sensitive topic, Leilani doesn't ask for more from him. They're both hurting, they've both lost someone, and she can't compare her broken heart to his - they're different things, formed differently and differently made. ]

What kind of aesthetic do you mean? Any hand will work well enough. [ Shifting, she moves a little closer. ] What level of function do you think we can manage?

[samahl]

I've been working on something that would let me use a bow again. I think with some application I might be able to come up with something that would let you use a staff? If that's something you're interested in?

As far as aesthetic, things like color, shape and form, anything like that. The one I wear around Kirkwall, for example, has a design painted along it. It helps put the humans at ease if I wear something beautiful.

But this would be designed for you.

[veilstrike]

I'd like to be able to use my staff again, yes. I'm trying to learn how to use it with one hand, just in case.

[ She frowns, considering the idea of having a design on her arm and all she can do is breathe out, turning her head a little. ]

Could it match my tattoo?

[samahl]

Oh absolutely. It really is up to your imagination.

[She'll have to tell him what design she used, but that's the point of designing it together.]

[veilstrike]

[ There's a moment where she pauses thoughtfully and then she just turns, taking off her shirt so that he can see the tattoo across her shoulders. Green and blood red roses are intertwined with a long vine, a snake with bull horns curling around the midst of them all. Peeking over her shoulder, she grins. ]

Too complex?

[samahl]

Not at all.

[He examines the work carefully, making sure he understands the lines and how the images work together to form the whole of it.]

It's beautiful. And it will be wonderful to have a hand that matches it, I think.

[veilstrike]

[ Maybe she should be more concerned about stripping in front of him, but she doesn't quite see an issue with it. They're not the same person, technically, but she has an edge of careful shamelessness about her in his company.

He's experienced the same things she has, after all. Who better to empathise? ]

Thank you, lethallin. I appreciate the kindness.

[samahl]

[He also doesn't seem to think there is anything unusual about her exposing her skin to him, but then his thoughts on nudity are a little different than what others might think.]

Think nothing of it. I know how frustrating all of this can be. I want to help where I can.

[veilstrike]

I'm beginning to get used to it, but it hasn't been too long a time.

[ She glances at her lost arm before she sighs. ]

It's strange. I think I miss the Anchor.

[samahl]

[Cyril presses his lips together at the expression of a sentiment he had never shared.]

I know... But don't miss the overwhelming pain, at least. At least the ache that remains is bearable. At least for now.

[veilstrike]

[ Maybe it's the connection with Solas she misses, or the fact that it made her something more than she was before - a First of a Clan who were so close to being destroyed. ]

No, that is something I don't miss. At least it makes sense now.

[samahl]

[Cyril is quiet for a moment, unsure how to approach his subject but a part of him needing to put words to it.]

None but the Dread Wolf could bare it and live. It doesn't put a damper on any long term plans one might have.

[veilstrike]

Just a few.

[ Leilani lifts her shoulder, settling back and crossing her legs under herself. ]

I can't say I wasn't shocked to learn the truth, but looking back... It all does tie together.

[samahl]

[He nods at that, unable to escape how true that is. There are so many times he'll look back and remember things that Solas had said only now they all seem to be telling him the truth, just in ways that made it so less obvious exactly what truth he was sharing at the time.]

Sometimes I wonder how I didn't see it at the time, but no one thinks that legends are speaking to them.

[veilstrike]

[ It hurts even more, recognising that while he never outright lied he twisted his words and hid his answers to the questions she asked. It was so clever, and so well done, and it breaks her heart even more. ]

We had no reason to imagine the Dread Wolf could be on Thedas, let alone pretending to be an apostate. I wouldn't believe it myself if I hadn't seen the temples.

[samahl]

[Cyril feels the truth of that weighing down on him.]

Did you believe before that? In the Creators I mean?

[veilstrike]

I believed enough to feel pride in my vallaslin. I think... I believed they were true, that they existed, but I'm not sure if I believed they cared as much as other people did. It's difficult to look back and think of something when your mind has been so changed.

[samahl]

[Cyril looks down for a moment, feeling an odd sense of grief - distant because it never really applied to him, but still there. Like the grief, you feel when a friend's parent has died.]

I never did. I thought they were fun stories, but nothing more. I couldn't even begin to imagine the world as it once was, before the Veil.

It's strange. We learned so much but all it makes me feel is a strong sense that I know even less than I did before.