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Who: Tyrion Lannister
Broadcast: Public
Action: The Marvisa
When: Right about now.

[Welcome to a view on the Marvisa, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome back your friendly neighborhood Tyrion Lannister who sits up blearily to stare into the camera with sleepy mis-matched eyes of green and black. He blinks a few times, runs a hand through his too thick golden curls, then peers at his surroundings. A sigh escapes his lips.]

... so either I have over imbibed or the Lords of Atroma have seen fit to kick me out and then kick me back in again. Lovely.

[He cracks his neck to the left, to the right, and strokes his beard.]

Since I am stuck on this ship for the next few days -- hello friends. What have I missed and what terrible trouble are we in now?

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'Bull'. Fitting. The size of the man and his bravery, I am guessing.

[He can see those fleet of scars, ser. Not to mention that dashing looking eyepatch.]

Bravery? Hmm. [He rolls his shoulders is a shrug, leaning back and crossing his arms.] Maybe, but bravery's for heroes. Me? Heh, I'm just an old merc who likes to go where he can hit the most things.

[He considers the feed for a moment with his good eye for a moment before adding.]

What about you, Tyrion? What's everybody's good friend known for?

Aaaah, well. I won't tell you that one of the foremost literary traps for any hero is to say he isn't one ... oh wait, I have.

[He smirks, and that smirk only deepens.]

Honestly, I am quite well adept at speaking. At great length and with a great deal of convincing rhetoric.

[And the Bull's chuckling...because you remind him of someone, and it's not a bad memory.]

Look. I'm just a mercenary who likes to kick some ass, drink some ale, and not go to bed empty-handed. If that makes me a hero, then the books have been lying.

[He chuckles. It's plain to see through the video, in comparison to the beds he remembers from his own arrival, Tyrion's a lot...smaller than he is.]

So I see, Tyrion. Maybe that's a dwarf thing? You guys tell really tall tales to make up for it? I know a guy who's a professional author, makes his living on bullshit. I hear it's pretty good pay. [A beat.] You kinda remind me of him. I think he used to be around here. Varric Tethras? He owned a bar.

[To be fair, Bull, most people are much smaller than you. Tyrion is just smaller than most.]

Ahhh, Ser Tethras. Yes I did know him, the time that he was here. You are correct, he had many tales to tell and all of them entertaining. I rather liked him.

[A delicate pause.] ... however, to be clear, I am a different kind of ... dwarf. I do not have a different ancestry. In fact, both my mother and father are human. Well, I know my mother was. My father might have come from a long line of vicious arseholes.

[Yeah, yeah. He knows.]

Ha! Yeah, Varric's good for a laugh...and a load of horse shit.

[Bull considers Tyrion's explanation for a moment before nodding.] Huh. That's new, but- [And he shrugs.] Why not? [And he spreads his hands wide, well, as wide as he can in the confines of his ship.] If I offended you, I'm sorry.

[And you know, because Tyrion started it.]

I'm going out on a limb here, but...nobility? In my experience, fathers of noble lines are almost always assholes.

[The smile on Tyrion's face widens.]

He never did tell me about the crossbow, though. I assumed that was a great secret in itself.

[He waves his hand.] On the contrary, I am honored. I have heard the dwarven people to be ... a little conservative for my tastes, but otherwise a pleasant lot. And it would be nice to have things built to scale for once.

[A faint smirk, before his eyebrows rose together. Now that was a good read.] Very much so. Please, try not to hold it against me.

You're kidding, right? I mean, it's not that hard to figure out. [Nevermind that he's met the "Bianca" in question. He's not going to tell the story, even the broken bits he knows. Varric's his friend and you don't betray trust like that.] Bianca's probably some woman he was sweet on. Maybe she died.

[Bull chuckles at that, looking around his small cabin...which is small by the Fleet's standards and they shoved a Qunari in it.] I know, right?

Bah. [And he shakes his head at that.] ...nobles can be pretty uptight, but I've got it on good authority the ones who didn't live up to their fathers' standards aren't so bad.

Well of course it's a woman - but which woman? Why? I know I could call my gun Tysha and have some rather interesting tales to tell on her behalf ... but without the story it's just a fancy way to name the tools of one's trade.

[He smirked even further.] You could probably look into an upgrade. Considering your ... general largesse.

[A snort of amusement.] Well then I should be considered amazing.

Bianca, I guess, but I'm just assuming. [He shrugs.] That's how I know she's important. People you care about but don't mean the world to you, you'll talk about. Bianca's "sacred".

[He looks around again.] Maybe I'll talk to my boss about it.

[And he chuckles.] Maybe, big guy. Tell me about Tysha.

Sacred ... yes, that would be the word I am looking for.

[Head tilt.] You have a boss already?

Tysha ... is a story for a few bottle of wine, my new friend.

Captain, yeah. Aren't they the ones who call the shots around here, at least where their ships involved?

[He laughs.] Ha! I like where this is going. You're on, soon as you get off that rig.

Really depends on the Captain ... but yes, for the most part. I've always seen it as more of an honorary title, after all.

[He tips a bow.] Good! I am always glad to have another drinking companion.

Maybe most of the time, but when shit goes ass up, it's better if one person's calling the shots. So far, mine seems pretty good at it, and that suits me fine.

[He chuckles.]

If that's your game, Tyrion, the Iron Bull is with you.

Oh well then I might be in trouble ... mine seems to just want to make everyone like him.

[Good thing he always had so many weapons...]

My game is ... well it's complicated but there are tits and wine? Will that suffice?

Is it you?

[He's grinning alright? It's a joke, big guy.]

...well, shit. Yeah. I'm game. Anybody I know?

Not any more! [He grins in turn.] My main concern was making sure we were armed to the teeth - then making everyone like me.

Not yet. And you get to have all the tits, as I am a married man. [See this generous sacrifice, Bull?]

Ha! I like the way you think, Tyrion. A captain should be liked by his crew.

What, your wife doesn't give you tits, anymore? [He shakes his head.] Humans are weird.

And he should also arm them.

Aaaaah I had an arranged marriage ... so ... tits weren't really on the table. Then. They might be in my future though!

Good. Where I come from, just about every nobleman has a mistress or ten. Maybe I can keep an eye out for you.

[Get it? Just the one...since it's the only one he's got.]

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