driftfleet | (no subject)

Who: Cyril Lavellan
Broadcast: OPEN
Action: The Space Bar
When: After he wakes up.

[Network]

[Cyril has been asleep for the last few weeks and when he finally comes to he feels an odd sense of resignment over this whole thing. He really should be angrier, he thinks, but all he can really do is sigh, shake his head, and get really drunk.]

Well, I'm in a mood for a drink. If anyone wants to join me, I'll be at the Space Bar.

[Action]

[And that is exactly where he is after he makes this announcement. He seems pretty relaxed as he orders something strong and works to finish it off. He really doesn't want to seem contemplative or mopey, but he can't quite shake the realization that Atroma could literally do anything to him and he'd be powerless to stop them.

He hates not being able to control every little thing about his own body.

That's why he looks especially well tonight. His make up is even more on point than normal, his hair is perfectly placed, his clothes chosen to complement his form the best way he can, and everything about his body language is so tightly performative - purposely portraying the image of someone without a care in the world.

These are the things he does control. He controls how much alcohol he puts in his system and allows the fuzz to take away the edge of the sharp fear in his chest. He controls how much he smiles and jokes with those around him. He needs to believe that he maintains some level of control, because being reminded that the chip in his head means Atroma can play with him like a little toy makes an uneasiness settle over him he would very much like to ignore for now.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[After a moment, he pulls away so he can look at her properly.]

We should do something to give us both a reprieve then.

What did you have in mind, hm?

Actually, I was thinking about trying to see if I could help tend to this garden. Would you consider that a distraction? I could use more green in my life.

I think I could make that work. I did enjoy caring for the garden in Skyhold.

Me as well, though Harding did tease me a bit for the amount of elfroot we grew.

I don't even want to ask what you were doing with it.

Mostly it was potions! And... recreation.

Recreation. [ She snorts. ] I've never done that.

You haven't?

Back in the Clan, there was this boy. A beautiful, troubled boy. I... [Weird, how he can't even bring himself to say 'I loved him' now, when there's nothing to lose by saying it.] Well, he was everything to me for a long time.

But he was also made of fire. All passion and emotion. And rage. We learned how to use elfroot because it calmed him down. Then, for a while, it helped with the pain of the Anchor.

Not really. I spent my time studying, if I'm being honest.

[ Leilani knows what he means, but she nods her head, offering him a soft, gentle smile. ]

I didn't have anyone like that. I had some people that I knew, [ intimately ] but no one that I loved.

It must be difficult to be First. The amount of responsibility you hold. I know it can be isolating.

And then you were made Inquisitor and that was likely all the worse.

It wasn't as bad as people think. I had the Keeper, and I had my books. [ Not many friends, though, which is why the Inquisition was so delightful in her eyes.

She met so many new people, so many people she began to care about. ] I had friends.

And now you have more. That is one thing we both gained through our shared circumstances.

I know. I am more glad for it than I can say, truly. It was a gift I hadn't really thought I would get.