driftfleet | We'll be back after these important messages

[just when it seems like the Hosts are going to leave you all to yourselves, with this latest upset--augments glitching left and right, revealing things that are supposed to be hidden--the faces of Atroma appear once more. the usual jingle plays from the speakers in the main hall, and the giant screen flickers to life.

Diamond's smiling face once again graces her beloved passengers.]

Good evening, everyone! I hope you are all doing well, despite the... continuing technical issues.

I would first like to thank you all for being so patient! We greatly appreciate your cooperation through this difficult time, and we want to assure you that the repairs are nearly complete.

I can't imagine how eager you all must be to get out of here and return to the comfort of your own ships. I want nothing more than to speed the fleet through this rough patch, and get back to our regularly scheduled activities.

So... if you're like me, and are getting tired of all of this calibration nonsense, let me tell you exactly how we can all make that happen.

[and here's where she takes a breath, with a little rise and drop of her shoulders, but she doesn't let her smile falter.]

...I see that some of you have been digging at things that might seem fun and interesting at first, but I would like to let you know that the more energy we spend putting everything back where it belongs, the longer the calibrations are going to take.

So, instead of making things harder on yourselves and on us, I would like you all to do something that will speed things up a bit. Instead of straining yourselves on outdated and silly things, I encourage you to find someone who isn't part of your own crew and talk to them. Make a new friend and tell them all about your ship and the interesting folks you live with.

Not only will the audience love it, but you will be focusing on your beloved ships and establishing new connections, and that is just the kind of thing that will make this whole thing easier on all of us.

Sounds simple, right? Just get out there, say hello to someone, exchange some stories, and we'll all be done with this unpleasant business in no time.

[and just as they had on the first day of calibration, your Hosts are right there, present and listening.

you certainly don't have to answer them in the way that they would like, but if you do have anything to say to the Hosts, now is a great time to do so. who knows when they'll deign to speak to the fleet in real-time again.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He sounds amicable as always, when he speaks, but the undercurrent of sarcasm is very much there. He's kinda pissy about the whole memory thing.]

"The more energy we spend putting everything back where it belongs, the longer the calibrations are going to take."

Okay. So. Call me crazy a lot of people do and they're not entirely wrong but that sounds a teensy weensy ever so tiny bit like a threat. In that 'bad foals, you stop playing about with something that might help you or the memory exposing nightmares will never end' kind of way. There's a tone there, y'know?

[He gives a little shrug of his shoulders. ]

Doesn't seem to follow with that Stepford happy squeaky clean theme you guys have been running with. Might wanna watch that. You know what they say about image. Once its dirtied, no soap in the world can clean it again.

Kinda like getting sauerkraut on a tablecloth. Blegh.

[she clicks her tongue at him, in a gently disapproving way.]

I'm not threatening you, dear. I'm only being honest. And I'm trying to help you.

Focusing on your ship, and stopping this silly tampering with things that really won't help anyone, will help this all end more quickly.

[His ears fold back and he gives an annoyed, horsey snort. He'd say what he really thinks about you, but his TV G rating forbids him from such things. But he's sure thinking it. ]

Which is it? Focusing on my ship or focusing on people outside my ship?

[He asks it idly, examining the tip of a forehoof. ]

Got some mixed messages there.

[speaking with oh so much measured patience here.]

My instructions are simple. Focus on your home ship, your beloved crewmates, and do so by talking with people who may not know them-- otherwise you'd just be repeating things they already know. It's just good conversation, dear.

And the longer you tamper with things that really don't benefit you anyway, the longer the calibrations will have to take.

Trust me... we don't want you to be stuck here, anymore than you do.

[Oh he hears that tone and it makes him want to tamper MORE. ]

Pretty sure them wandering about in our heads tells them everything they need to know about us anyway. Just sayin'.

This it the tone I use when I believe you. Note the heavy use of sarcasm.

[and with that, her smile loses anything that might have been genuine. whatever it might have been before, it's definitely all business now.]

I apologize if the calibrations have caused you any undue distress, and we will continue to hurry the repairs as much as we can.

In the meantime, any cooperation--which helps speed the process along--would be greatly appreciated.

[Oh ho, don't play with smiles lady, he KNOWS smiles. ]

How about you stop the calibrations and we'll stop playing about with your things? Fair deal?

[the business tone just continues, as she has the mannerisms of heading this conversation toward its close.]

As stated before, the calibrations are a necessary repair mechanism that will end once resynchronization is completed. You can choose to speed the process along, or hinder it. Simple as that.

Atroma does hope you will cooperate, and thanks you for your patience.

[Cheese would like to rail against this, but he knows it's pointless. Paradisa may never have spoken, but he gets the same vibe from Atroma as he did the castle. It's like arguing with a brick wall. ]

Yeah. I'm sure you do.

[Rot in Tartarus :| ]

[this wall may not have the literal bricks and mortar that Paradisa had, but Diamond cheerily cuts the conversation off just the same.

with a smile, she ends the broadcast.]

We'll be back after these important messages

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