/takes the huntress out back and buries it (jan mingle pt. II)

[scrubscrub]

Who: Anyone on the SS Huntress! Crew and visitors.
Broadcast: N/A
Action: SS Huntress
When: More of January! We got three new crew mates and it will be messy.

IT'S ANOTHER MINGLE FOR OUR EVER-EXPANDING SHIP.

Also, we need an update on how well Koala is doing at pinball.

God, help this ship.

Comments

[fishwife]

[She leaaaaaaans in, grinning with all her sharky teeth.]

You're short, cute, pinkish, and don't eat enough. What else could you be?

[nerdeology]

[He doesn't like where this is going. And those teeth are terrifying.]

I'm a seraph.

[AND HE WILL RUN THE HECK AWAY IF YOU SO MUCH AS LICK YOUR LIPS, HE'S NOT GETTING EATEN TODAY]

[fishwife]

[SHE DOESN'T EAT HUMANS WTF??? She's not spiderbitch!!]

What, like an angel? [The only angel she's aware of is the angel of death. Which he definitely doesn't look like.] I thought angels had wings.

[nerdeology]

[LOOK IT'S HARD TO GET OVER THE HELLION-THING

And really? Really? This again...]

Not that kind of seraph.

[fishwife]

[She slips her hands in her pockets, thankfully giving him his space back.]

So what's the difference?

[nerdeology]

No wings, for one.

[He's not all that familiar with angels, since the only one he can ever recall hearing about was a hellion, but apparently they're called seraphs in other worlds? Weird.

Whatever. When it doubt, go by what history's taught them:]

"Things which cannot be seen or explained, such as gods, spirits, or supernatural phenomena are revered by the people as seraphim." Some here have called me a ghost, but that's wrong. A spirit is... closer, I suppose.

[fishwife]

I noticed. [She wants to pick him up and look at him and it'd be SO EASY but the last time she did that, someone started crying. So maybe not.]

Nah, you're not a ghost. That'd make you a monster, like me. [It's said without any trace of meanness; obviously it's a designation and not an insult on her world.]

Do seraphim eat?

[nerdeology]

[...Monster, huh. Looking at her, that isn't a surprise, but she's so nonchalant about it. Are hellions and monsters two different things, then? He still can't sense anything, but there have been those who can suppress it...]

We do sometimes. It isn't required to stay alive, though.

[fishwife]

[She seems genuine, if a bit... intense.]

If you feel the urge, I made some spaghetti. It's in the fridge. [She jerks a thumb in the direction of the kitchen.] It isn't weaponized this time.

[nerdeology]

[Wait, what]

Why would spaghetti be weaponized?

[fishwife]

Too much cayenne? [She shrugs.]

[nerdeology]

[Good grief.]

How do you cook here? I've never seen equipment like this before.

[Stoves are fine and all, but where do you light the fire??]

[fishwife]

Oh, you're a bumpkin! Here, let me show you.

[She reaches over to one of the many knobs on it... and turns it all the way up.

The burner promptly bursts into flame.]

Easy as pie.

[nerdeology]

[OH MY GOD HOW]

Wh- that's dangerous!!

[He lifts his hand, summoning an arte, and water splashes all over the stove, replacing the fire with a puff of black smoke.]

[fishwife]

Hey! Was that really necessary?

[Undyne turns the oven off with another spin of the knob, so that the steam will abate.]

At least you can control the amount of fire this way. It's safer than an open fire! [A pause.] As long as you don't cook something too long, that is.

[nerdeology]

The stove was on fire. How was it not necessary!?

[And this is their cook!? How are any of the humans still alive...]

[fishwife]

It's supposed to do that! That's how it cooks! I had it handled, anyway.

[A very good question.]

[nerdeology]

If you use a fire like that then the food will get burned!

[SHE'S WORSE THAN SOREY WHAT THE HECK]

[fishwife]

Are you sure? Sometimes it just cooks faster.

[oh my god.]

[nerdeology]

It doesn't-

[HRRRGHHHHHH. This person is a trial already.]

Faster does not equal better.

[fishwife]

[She considers... and then she lifts her hands in a gesture of surrender.]

All right, fine. Why don't you show me how it's done?