(no subject)

[experiencepoints]

Who: A ~mysterious anonymous poster~ and you
Broadcast: Anonymous text
Action: In her room on the Bishop, if you really want to say hello
When:

[It's taken Nightingale a while to figure out how to make the anonymous text function work, and even longer to decide it's worthwhile to post. Still, she doesn't have anything else to do, and this has been eating at her for a while...]

I realized recently it's been over a year since I was last home.
Over a year since I've ever seen anyone from my world, even.
And that year has been kind of a mess.
Now I'm two crazy worlds removed from home, and it's not looking like I'll get to go back anytime soon.
It's just now really starting to sink in.
I'm starting to get homesick, I guess.
But I know there's a bunch of people here who have been here even longer than I have.
Or have a lot more pressing things to get back to.
So... How do you cope?
How can you deal with this for so long?
After this long, my usual distractions aren't really working so well anymore.

Comments

anon text

[effluent]

then whatever shit advice you find in this network isn't going to help

anon text

[experiencepoints]

Probably not.
But it's worth a try anyway.
I don't lose anything by trying, anyway.

anon text

[effluent]

or in the end you just feel more alone than you did before

anon text

[experiencepoints]

In which case, there's alcohol on the Iskaulit.

anon text 1/2

[effluent]

better apologize to your liver
nothing to lose, my ass

anon text

[effluent]

[there's a minute gap before the second text appears]

what did you want to hear?

anon text

[experiencepoints]

[She's about halfway through replying to the first one when the second comes in, and she deletes it to focus on the reply that matters.]

I don't know.
If I knew even that much, I probably wouldn't have had to even make this post.
Something comforting, I guess.
Something to make this place worth it.
Even if the ones I care about keep leaving.

anon text

[effluent]

you care enough to still look for hope
doesn't that mean you've already got it, or some hallmark card crap like that?

the way I see it either you build something new here
or you remember what you're fighting to go back to and keep that in you
if that thing or bond or hope is enough to pull you through the bullcrap
then you've got your answer

anon text

[experiencepoints]

I don't think it works that way.
But thanks.
It just gets hard here.
I'm constantly reminded how alien all of this is to me.
Or, I guess I'm the alien one here.
It's incomprehensible half the time.

anon text

[effluent]

the alien space-shit and ships
or everyone inside them?

anon text

[experiencepoints]

Both.

anon text

[effluent]

people get easier
they're kind of predictable when you pay attention to the right things

anon text

[experiencepoints]

For you, maybe.
Predicting people is not a talent I have, unless someone is really obvious.

anon text

[effluent]

here's a tip free of charge
everyone wants something
could be selfish, could be nice, doesn't matter there's something they want
that's the big equalizer

anon text

[experiencepoints]

... Not always.
There's exceptions.
And that doesn't always help.

anon text

[effluent]

I call bullshit
unless someone is ready to die
there has to be something

anon text

[experiencepoints]

Like I said.
Exceptions.

anon text

[effluent]

okay then shoot
tell me about this mythical selfless soul

anon text

[experiencepoints]

Like you said, someone who's ready to die.
Someone who's just broken inside.