driftfleet | oo1; accidental video/action

Who: Alistair and YOU?!
Broadcast: Fleetwide; mostly accidental.
Action: On the Marsiva!
When: Now? Now. Sure, now.

Teagan? Teagan! [ The man on the camera is young, handsome, and looking a bit put out to be where he is. This isn't his castle! What is this place? He's also sort of looking away from the screen, not fully aware he's broadcasting. He mostly thinks he's talking to himself. ]

Okay, hah hah, very funny, you've had your joke, now where are you? And where am I? I'm sure I've got a very important meeting with someone who will be very angry when I don't show up - not that I care much if I'm making the Orlesians angry, it's sort of funny when their faces get all red and they start trying not to swear, but still...

Have I been kidnapped? Has someone kidnapped me? I'm pretty sure kidnapping the king is treason. I can have your head for that. [ He doesn't sound so much angry as... vaguely confused and disoriented. ] Off with your head. Whenever I figure out who you are, I suppose.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ That gets a chuckle from Alistair. ]

Fair enough. The same could be said for a lot of Thedas, I suppose. I'd still rather be there than here.

As would most of us. Still, at least very little tries to kill us here.

What a relief. It does get a little tiresome after a while, everyone trying to kill you all the time.

Not being able to turn a corner without a band of bandits or insane cult members trying to kill you.

[It's hard, being a party member. ]

Cultists. Those are really creepy. We once fought a cult that worshiped a dragon, thought she was Andraste. Nasty piece of business.

...

[What the flying fuck is wrong with people? WHY IS THEDAS SO FUCKED UP??? ]

I'm not even sure why I was briefly surprised by that.

Yeah, it was the weirdest thing! They were living up in the mountains and they tried to kill us just for asking questions!

You likely insulted their...dragon worshipping by asking something any sane person would.

[Like "why are you worshipping a fucking dragon???"]

We just wanted a pinch of ashes! They didn't even care about it, they were just angry they couldn't get to the urn.

So...they wished to kill you because you wanted something they couldn't get anyway?

[Why is their world so fucked up? He really, really wants to know. ]

Sort of. They asked us to defile Andraste's Sacred Ashes. To free their dragon goddess from... something. I don't know, I don't speak crazy.

Ah. I imagine the Chantry people did not approve much of such a thing.

[Sebastian would have had literal kittens. ]

They probably wouldn't have. We didn't do it, though, so that made the cultists angry. After a while, you'd think people would learn not to throw themselves at Solona Amell! All that happens is they die.

[...Ah. That would explain why Riona flipped out. ]

I have heard that about the Hero of Ferleden.

[ This 'different timelines' thing is giving him a damn headache. ]

Wasn't that long ago we were all fugitives. Now - it's weird.

Not for me. Your battle against the Archdemon happened a decade ago.

Ugh. Not more future stuff.

[Be glad you don't have the knowledge of TIME TRAVEL wrapped up in all this bullshit, Alistair. It's the worst.]

Hm. Not as far as most of the others, however.

What a relief?

[ He's rubbing his forehead and wincing. ] I can see why we shouldn't know the future.

From my experience, it holds nothing but mystery. My advice is to remain as ignorant about is as long as you can.

Yeah, I'm going to be avoiding learning any more, that's for sure.

[ And possibly try to forget what he's already learned, with booze. ]

[Booze cures EVERYTHING. ]

That would be for the best. I wish you luck with that.

Yeah, thanks.

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