driftfleet | (no subject)

Who: Obi-Wan Kenobi
Broadcast: Text
Action: Iskaulit
When: Jan 30th

A: TEXT

I think it's time I retire from teaching for a while.

I don't suppose anyone knows a decent way to pass the time?

B: ACTION

[ When Stefan announced the prayer room, a quiet place for meditation, Obi-Wan had been thrilled. While he enjoyed and cared for the Huntress, quiet is not something they are known for. After talking to Anakin, he knew he was in dire need of quiet and inner peace

He does not regret ( he can not regret )

And yet.

In a way he had envisioned as a child, it had always been Master and Padawan, together. Even when separate, they fought together, learned together, believed in each other. But Qui-Gon died all too soon, and for so long, Obi-Wan threw his hands up against tradition. When Yoda told him to be Anakin's master, he chose to be Anakin's friend. He did not caution against attachment, only warned where it might lead.

He breathes heavily, his legs folded on the mat. It's not working. The Force is still too quiet, too alien at this moment. It doesn't understand his sorrow.

Obi-Wan chuckles, opening his eyes and pushing his hair back. It should be used to that by now.

Looking down at his hands, he's quiet when he speaks. ]

Please help me.

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[ He doesn't like it. There's more in the future he knows he's not being told and he rather not press the issue. But Ahsoka has a point too. ]

The future is set for the others. What exactly would we talk about?

I don't know-- maybe if we had a plan, we could run it by them. They probably have insight and information we don't. They might be able to come up with solutions we can't, or tell us if our plan wouldn't work.

[ That might be the best solution. At least others won't have to compromise what they know. He nods, somber. ]

I can't violate the confidence given to me, but perhaps we can brainstorm some ideas.

... Good. Then-- that's that.

[She nods with determination, looking out into the middle distance.

She doesn't feel okay by any stretch of the imagination, but she can't sit around and do nothing, either. Having some kind of plan of action makes her feel better, at least. Like she's not completely helpless.

A small part of her wonders if this wouldn't be considered a certain kind of heresy, in the eyes of the Force. To question the will of the Force, to try to change it. That perhaps she should work on accepting it, rather than rejecting it. After all, who is she to question the Force?

But it's a very small part, and she shoves it down. Ahsoka is not made for inaction.]

[ He glances at her. She's very young and for a brief moment, he regrets saying anything at all. Perhaps it was a bit too much to place. And like Anakin, she too can react emotionally and impulsively.

Still . . . trust your instincts, he keeps telling himself. There's more here that he simply cannot do with knowledge.

He exhales. Some of it leaves him into the Force. He does not need to hold onto this anymore. It's out of his hands now. ]

[With Obi-Wan's exhale, she finds herself exhaling in sync, too-- an automatic reflex. With it, she feels her combativeness deflate somewhat, and all that she's left with is the horrible knowledge Obi-Wan has imparted to her.]

... I'm sorry. I don't mean to make your life more difficult, Obi-Wan.

But I think-- I think I need some time to myself right now. To think things through.

I know.

[ And he does. He knows Anakin and Ahsoka, in a way he doesn't know himself at times. It's partly the reason why he told her to begin with.

( it's why when Anakin chose, he felt nothing but relief )

No one makes a life difficult. You simply have to live it. Obi-Wan has been through difficulties that would make anyone quake in fear. He has yet to give in. Even though he came perilously close.

It is not fear that will defeat him, but despair.

He will not allow it. ]

Take the time you need, Ahsoka.

[She gives him a grateful smile, but it's weak.]

... Thanks.

You stay here. I don't think I'm quite ready to meditate on this one just yet.

[She walks over to the door, intending to head out, but then she turns back--]

And... thank you. For trusting me.

[ He can't find his voice. But he finally murmurs. ]

You're welcome.

[ He centers himself onto the mat once more. Peace is still beyond reach and he has a long way to go. ]

[As for Ahsoka, it's time to go find a punching bag.]