(no subject)

[beardstrokes]

Who: Obi-Wan Kenobi
Broadcast: Text
Action: Iskaulit
When: Jan 30th

A: TEXT

I think it's time I retire from teaching for a while.

I don't suppose anyone knows a decent way to pass the time?

B: ACTION

[ When Stefan announced the prayer room, a quiet place for meditation, Obi-Wan had been thrilled. While he enjoyed and cared for the Huntress, quiet is not something they are known for. After talking to Anakin, he knew he was in dire need of quiet and inner peace

He does not regret ( he can not regret )

And yet.

In a way he had envisioned as a child, it had always been Master and Padawan, together. Even when separate, they fought together, learned together, believed in each other. But Qui-Gon died all too soon, and for so long, Obi-Wan threw his hands up against tradition. When Yoda told him to be Anakin's master, he chose to be Anakin's friend. He did not caution against attachment, only warned where it might lead.

He breathes heavily, his legs folded on the mat. It's not working. The Force is still too quiet, too alien at this moment. It doesn't understand his sorrow.

Obi-Wan chuckles, opening his eyes and pushing his hair back. It should be used to that by now.

Looking down at his hands, he's quiet when he speaks. ]

Please help me.

Comments

[mistyday]

Oh.

[It must be like how Cordelia felt, when Queenie left.]

You feel like you lost him, like you coulda done more, right?

[beardstrokes]

[ Uncannily perceptive. Though Obi-Wan always faltered in matters of the heart. ]

I simply wonder if it was my teachings that led to this.

[mistyday]

Maybe. Maybe not. But [She shrugs] kids are kids. They get a certain idea in their minds, decide something is unfair, it's hell convincin' them of anything else.

[beardstrokes]

The world's always against them. Especially the adults.

[ It had still . . . hurt, in a way. Knowing that being on the Council meant Anakin and Ahsoka didn't fully trust him. ]

[mistyday]

But you're not. You're like Cordelia, you actually do care, you care a lot.

[beardstrokes]

. . . Yes.

[ It's fact, written deep in his soul. If he knew how to stop, perhaps he would.

But he doesn't. ]

It's how I've always been.

[mistyday]

He's lucky, you know, to have someone who gives a shit about him, whether he realizes it or not.

[beardstrokes]

I think that's debatable. At least, from his point of view.

[mistyday]

Doesn’t make it any less true, just ‘cause he doesn’t see it.

[beardstrokes]

[ Doesn't it? Focus determines reality. It doesn't matter how much effort he puts into it.

Perhaps it was expected. Obi-Wan had never been good at matters of the heart. Qui-Gon would have solved this easily. ]

I find that truth is often subjective to those who perceive it.

[mistyday]

There's still truths that are true no matter what though, right? The Force doesn't stop existin' just because someone doesn't believe in it. Same with magic or I don't know, the laws of physics.

Love is one of those things too.

[beardstrokes]

Well, I know my truth in the matter. At least.

[mistyday]

That’s good. Doesn’t make it hurt any less I know, but it’s still important.

[beardstrokes]

I would not deny it.

[ Even though he may not know how to fully express it. ]

[mistyday]

I'm sorry. I wish I was as good at fixin' heart hurt as I am at fixin' other hurts.

[beardstrokes]

Don't be.

Fixing a heart is never meant to be easy anyway.

[mistyday]

No, I guess it's not.

[She settles again, closing her eyes.]

I'm ready now I think, for real this time.

[beardstrokes]

All right then. Take the position and we'll try again.

[mistyday]

[She nods and does as he says, taking deep breaths in the process. This time she settles in much more quickly and easily: she wouldn't say her mind is clear, exactly, but the thoughts are much less insistent.]

[beardstrokes]

[ The Force slips around them, filling the space between the air. Obi-Wan can sense it and he barely restrains to reach out to it, to sink into its currents and have it wash away his uncertainties.

But it wasn't about him. Not right now. ]

The Force is like a river of light. Clear your mind until you see it before you. Let your feelings go and let the Force in.

[mistyday]

[River of light, river of light. Misty focuses only on those words, on trying to feel beyond the surface of her senses. It doesn't come immediately, but slowly... slowly... she begins to feel a tug, something just out of reach.]

I think... I can feel it!

[beardstrokes]

[ His lips twitch at her enthusiasm. ]

Nicely done. The Force is always with us. We simply need to reach out to it.

[mistyday]

[There's a slight hesitation, though it's clear she's still excited.]

What's it like, when you do?

[beardstrokes]

Like I'm being bathed in light.

[ Sometimes, Obi-Wan feels more like a vessel to contain all that glorious energy, to move with the flow of the universe. For him, letting go is never a problem because all Obi-Wan wants is to serve the will of the Force.

Until now, anyway. ]

[mistyday]

That sounds really nice.

[And finally, she lets herself sink into the Force. The light that was at the edges of her consciousness now fills it. Everything that scares her, everything that makes her feel weak and alone, is forgotten, if only for a few minutes.]