driftfleet | first one to make that doctor who joke loses

[ Bless the Maker for her boots that will certainly be quiet dirty by the end of their little adventure but that doesn't matter! Spares her the hell of walking through all this without shoes entirely. Silly elves. ]

Not at all, not to mention it'd ruin my clothes. I worked hard for them you know, had to fight a dragon and everything.

[ For once Hawke decides not to take the lead, following just a little behind in hopes that Fenris' sense of direction is slightly better than her own. ]

How are those feet doing? Regretting your lack of shoes yet?

Yes, I do remember the dragon, Hawke. That was not exactly a fun time for any of us.

[That dragon was the WORST. All dragons are the worst. He huffs softly, trudging through the mud and really not enjoying the squelchy feeling between his toes.]

I will live. I have walked through worse.

[Like the Deep Roads. ]

Come now, Fenris, you had to have been having a little bit of a fun. I know I was.

[ But Hawke likes dragons, she still really wants to be a dragon. ]

Might need a bath when we get out of here.

[GRUNT. ]

It was a job. It is a lot less pleasant fighting a dragon when you have to be close enough for it to drool fire on you. I did not enjoy that part.

[Ah, not this is something he can get behind, and a smile crosses his face. A bath, please, so he can be clean and WARM.]

Maker, yes. Now that is something I would enjoy.

I am not sure what you're complaining about, you're not the one who almost got eaten. If anything I should be complaining.

[ It's hard for her lips not to press into a grin, she fights it as best she can though it is of little use. She grins like a stupid kid about to make a lewd suggestion, one that would make her mother faint should she ever hear it. ]

More than my irreplaceable company?

You were the one who told us to fight the dragon, if I recall.

[Okay so the douchey guy version of her that he knows but whatever. His point remains. That grin is enough to make him clear his throat awkwardly, but his smile remains. ]

There is little I enjoy more than that, Hawke.

I would attempt to deny that but I'd be lying.

[ Something things don't change no matter what, Hawke's decisions to do such things as fight dragons or go digging through filth being one of them.

If anything clearing his throat only makes her grin wide, brighter, edging perhaps too close to the side of smug. ]

You say that but a hot bath is pretty enjoyable. You're going to have to convince me.

[Ah, there's that smug grin. The one that convinces him that it's okay to loosen up a little. A minuscule amount, true, but for Fenris it's an awful lot. Not for the first time since she arrived on the Fleet, he realises how much he's missed her. The smallest of smirks plays across hi lips, mirroring hers. ]

Oh? And how do you propose I do that?

[ Her laugh is sharp, bright, bounces off the entrance as they close in on it. Dark, dank, pieces of an old mining operation still present, generally unpleasant but good enough for a temporary shelter. ]

It'd be cheating if I helped you, Fenris. [ The Champion all but skips inside and scoops up a few bits of burnable old wood. ] Maybe lean on past experience, I'm confident you can think of some way to convince me.

[He follows her with a leggy amble, chuckling deep in his throat. It's all too easy to fall back into their old banter.]

That does give me quite a few options, Hawke.

[ Hawke shrugs, lips pressed together in a obviously pleased grin as she goes about clearing space for a fire with her foot. Never one to make certain things simple, this one. ]

Does it? That is a shame, maybe try a few you never know what could work.

[She doesn't, and it's infuriating. He wants to just... he doesn't know, do something. Pick up where they left off. He knows she cares about him, and there's that niggly feeling in the back of his head that he's technically cuckolding himself. Still, he wants to. So much. ]

That could take all night.

[ They could, really, Hawke isn't against it but she doesn't make the towards it. Knows better than that, so all she does is grin at him, providing Fenris the opportunity to moves as he wishes. ]

Don't think we're going anywhere until morning, do you?

That is a very good point.

[He steps closer, shifting his pile of tinderwood to the crook of one arm. He's close enough to touch her, almost does, but hesitates. Always second guessing himself, even now. ]

I- we never talked about how we parted. In Exsilium.

[ That gives her a moment of pause, a sharp inhalation of breath. That, yes right, she remembers that keenly it was one of the first things to comes rushing back when she arrived on the fleet. ]

You never mentioned it. [ And she wasn't going to push. ]

[His brows furrow as his gaze drops to his feet. Unsure, uncertain how was best to proceed. He's never, ever going to be good at just taking what he wants. ]

I suppose I was afraid you had forgotten. Or maybe more so that you hadn't. [He hunches his shoulders in a half-shrug. ] I know I am not the Fenris you know back home.

[ Decides to busy her hands with the fire, grabbing a few scattered stones to make into a circle to place the wood. A little wooden tent like she used to do with Carver and Bethany, nights of camping barely a yard from their home. ]

Hard to forget something like that. [ To jest is as simple to her as breathing, she doesn't think twice about it. Knee-jerk reaction. ] Truthfully, Fenris, I don't see the difference you're the same brooding elf with the same brooding problems. Your memory is all that is different. [ And perhaps, she thinks hollowly, his heart. ]

And I don't expect anything from you, you know that? Ignoring my terrible habit of flirting with about as much as Isabela and my love for teasing until your face goes red. Just don't think you have to do anything because of how things stand in my world.

[Fenris stands awkwardly near her. He knew they needed to have this conversation eventually, that he couldn't just ignore it forever. More to the point, he didn't want to ignore it. ]

I don't brood. [The response is automatic by now, he almost doesn't even realise he's doing it. ] And it's not- it's not like that. This isn't out of some duty to some other version of myself.

[Another version of himself that has done far better than he has or likely ever will. Fuck you, Other Fenris. ]

I kissed you because I wanted to. You know better than anyone that I do nothing unwillingly.

[ If she had her way she'd talk herself out the conversation, change the subject somehow, joke until it is all forgotten. But that... Maker, it wouldn't be fair on either of them and even she knows it is a conversation they need to have. She can't run from everything.

Hawke sits staring at the little tent of sticks and dried grass, hand going out for whatever Fenris managed to accumulate. ]

You're right. [ Inhale, sharp, through the nose and mask. ] You're about as stubborn as a mule, doubt anyone could get you to do something you don't want to do. [ I kissed you because I wanted to. She shouldn't be so relieved to hear that, right? Maker's balls. ]

Exactly.

[Fenris wants to stay on his feet, to pace around, to look for a chance to bolt. He doesn't, though. He's so tired of running. He sits down heavily next to her, staring down at his feet. This is not...easy. ]

I met someone here. [He needs to get this out first, he supposes. ] His name was Dorian, a mage from Tevinter. Despite being the exact person I would want to wipe off the face of the planet, he continued to prove himself to me time and time again. We...grew close.

[He hates talking about this, it still feels sour in his mouth. ]

I thought I loved him but it was...difficult. We fought a lot. I think in the end, we were just too different to make it work. As much as it hurt, it was right that it ended. He left soon after, so I suppose it was for the best.

[ To say she is surprised... well, she is certainly surprised. Not in the bad way, but the... look it is really surprising to think Fenris met someone. ]

Dorian? Oh, I remember him. Charming fellow for a Tevinter. [ As surprising as it is to hear that her dear elf met someone, it is even more surprising to hear it was the Tevinter mage she encountered a couple of times during her stay in Skyhold - of all people a Tevinter mage.

Hawke forces herself to look back at their unlit fire then, listening and allowing it all to sink in. Inhaling as a surge of mana tingles her fingertips and a small flame comes to life in her hand. How is she to respond to this? Andraste's tits, everything that comes to mind sounds too callous to leave her mouth. She's sorry that he had relationship troubles but part a stupid selfish part of her is also glad the Vint is gone.

She flicks the flames into the sticks and dried grass, watching smoke slowly start to rise as the fire begins to crackle to life. Then she turns to look at him. ]

Want a hug?

[ Nailed it. ]

[His eyes stay on the fire as it blooms into life. Even now, more than a decade after his escape, he still tenses at the sight of magic brought to life, his muscles coiled and ready to run, or fight; whichever worked best. Some things, it seems, never change.

He lets out a low, rumbling chuckle at her comment, and his shoulders slacken a little. ]

Have I ever?

[He takes a few sticks, feeding the fire, before eventually turning to look at her. ]

I just- I was angry, when he left. That it ended the way it did. [That he let all his issues swallow him up again, that he pushed someone away.] But now... Now, I am glad it did.

[To have her come here, when he was struggling with a relationship that was equally burning and sinking...it would have been too cruel, even by Atroma's standards. For both of them. He exhales again, trying to find the words, struggling with them. They never come easy. ]

What I meant to say is that I'm glad that you are here. Even after...everything.

[ Hard not to feel awkward now taking a spare stick to poke at the fire, their source of warmth in the growing night. Emotional talks and Hawke have never truly meshed well, likely because she does everything in her power to avoid them - avoids talking about Bethany, about Leandra, about Carver, about Malcolm, about how read she was to throw herself into death's maw, about the nightmares that still haunt her sleep.

This? It's on a different scale but still... awkward. Something says she shouldn't be glad whatever he had ended, because that is frankly a horribly selfish thing to be glad about. But part of her is, just as it is glad for his awkward way of telling her he's happy she is here and he still... well things that weren't said before they left Exsillium are still there. Not said, but there.

Hawke exhales, fixes a smile upon her face, and turns to look at him fondly. ]

I see your ability to express yourself is still lacking. [ Ah, but she adores him for it. ] Thank you, yes thank you. For being glad and for remembering me.

[ Turning her head back to the fire Hawke laughs. ]

You know it's funny, I was scared I wouldn't be remembered. That the Hawke you all would remember wasn't me.

In that regard, I doubt I will ever change.

[His lips lift into a small smile, a touch shy, perhaps, but mostly happy. Content. This may be a difficult conversation, but he's not sad he's having it. Not at all.]

...I'm starting to believe it would be impossible to forget you at all. I-

[He hesitates, then closes his eyes with a sigh. It's totally not an angsty broody sigh at all nope. ]

Honestly, if I were to have a choice between going home and forgetting you or remaining here, I think I would choose the later.

[Thedas is so fucked up anyway and it's not like he even LIKES his Hawke. ]

I'm sure all of Thedas will agree with you there, especially considering Varric 'Tale of the Champion' is still floating about.

[ It's a need to do something with her hands that has her poking the fire with a stick, smokes and embers rising into the air as she does so. As awkward as it is, as she currently feels, she can't help but smile, can't help but feel relieved. ]

Aww, you say such the sweetest things.

[ Putting the stick aside she shuffles closer to him, just enough to place a quick kiss to his cheek.

Andraste's tits she must look stupid, sitting there grinning like some sort of idiot. Utterly too pleased with herself, she is, damning him as much as she damns herself. You're a fool Marian, an utter fool. ]

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wolfuncaged - 2016-05-06 16:57 (UTC) - Expand