driftfleet | Chapter Six [Text]

Entry tags:

Chapter Six [Text]

Who: Richard Castle and you
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Windrose if you really want?
When: RIGHT NOW

It was my birthday on the first of the month, and normally I'd have celebrated it, but having my first birthday here and this planet having deadly air have made me want to come clean about something.

I think I might be dead back home.

I don't know for certain, and I never will know unless someone from back home shows up AND they're from further down my timeline. Which is looking less and less likely the longer I'm here.

I'm not asking anyone else to share if they're in the same boat if they don't want to, but I'm still figuring out how to process it, and like I said, it's been hitting me hard lately. So I had to get it out somewhere.

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[She is even going to act like that wasn't super strange. It was though. For the record, it was.]

I'm not sure there's a right way to do this. It's not your average problem. I mean, what do you? Call everyone individually who you want to tell? And then what if you forget someone or just stopped to have dinner first and someone else finds out not from you. Suddenly it's like the high school version of telling everyone you're dead. [That's not a thing, Kitty.]

[Castle settled himself into a chair as Kitty spoke, and he considered her point before nodding agreement.]

That's a pretty good way to put it, actually. And maybe someone might see it and find out they're not alone, you know? That was part of my motivation for asking about it. I just... don't want to feel like I'm the only one dealing with this.

[She takes a chair too and then says the next sentence slowly.]

You're not even the only one in this room.

[So, yeah, there's that.] I mean, I've had it confirmed. I don't have to wonder. [She actually thinks the not knowing for sure would be harder.]

[Castle closed his eyes and inhaled.]

... Thanks for feeling comfortable sharing that with me. Did you know when you came here or... did someone tell you?

I found out at the prison, so I've known for about a year. When Kurt from home got here he accused me of impersonating a dead woman so if there was doubt left that's gone now. [The wardens could have just been playing games with her before, but while she always kept that in mind she found herself believing it.]

How did you find out? Is it just the last thing you remember seemed pretty unsurvivable?

[Castle sucked in a breath between his teeth at that.]

Damn- that had to have been a shock for him, too. I've spoken to Kurt a few times- nice guy.

And yeah, pretty much. I'd gotten dragged into a case my fiancee was working on and inhaled some kind of disease that was going to kill me in 24 hours. We were closing in on the perp, but I blacked out before I saw whether or not she got the antidote. Then I woke up here.

You're probably thinking of the other Kurt. [Is it sad she knows this less because of the simple timing of the younger Kurt being around longer and more because "nice guy" was the descriptor?] They're two different versions of the same person though. Mine arrived about a month ago. He has a red mark over his eye. [But you're not wrong. It was probably a shock for him too after losing so much back home. She doesn't let her thoughts stray far though. She listens to Castle's story with interest. It does remind her a bit of one Reid told her once about his own life. It was Anthrax for him, but he knew he recovered.]

Real life cliff hanger. [And a fiancee left behind too. Someone had mentioned he had a kid as well. It just gets worse.] Maybe she did. I hope so. [For both their sakes. That would be hard to live with.]

Oh, so now there are alternate universes coming into play? Sheesh. Being a contestant on the Drift Fleet is just ENDLESS fun.

[Castle nodded.]

Kate is competent. She had backup that's just as competent as her. But there's still that little nagging possibility that the perp got away with it.

Oh, please, almost everyone I know here is from an alternate universe of mine. [Okay, not really, but only because she knows a lot of people.

But she nods, sympathetic.]

I heard you have a daughter. [She imagines that's his main concern.]

Jeez. Atroma must really have it out for you- there are people you know, except noooooot quite, and also you're dead, surprise! Drama! RATINGS! [Castle made jazz hands before turning serious again.]

I do, yeah. Alexis. She's an adult now, so she could take care of herself if she needed to, and she's still got my mom and Kate to look out for her. But... she's my little girl, damnit.

[No one has ever jazz hands'd her death before, Castle. You are special. She does look amused by it rather than offended. No actual death for you today! Okay, that wasn't on the table even if she'd been offended.]

Hopefully it'll all be one long, needless scare and you'll get back there alive.

[Castle was indeed special, Kitty.]

Yeah... me, too. Now that I know for sure I'm not alone, I'm gonna try not to dwell on it too much. It's like... I've got it out in the open now, I've had people reassure me it's not a ridiculous idea, so it's like the air has deflated, so to speak.

Then it sounds like you made the right call in...making a call about it. Nothing looming over you. [Yeah, she should tell some people, shouldn't she?]

Yeah. I got it off my chest, and now I've gotten people to share the load with, so to speak.

But some new loads to carry too. I'm the cloud that comes with every silver lining. [Smiling.]

I dunno... this is the kind of load I don't mind carrying.

Then I'm glad it worked out for you. I'll let you get back to talking to our other death buddies.

Sure... and thanks for talking to me about it, too. I know it can be hard to be open.

It can be harder to be closed sometimes. [She gives him a little smile, nods her head and heads out of the room.]

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Chapter Six [Text]

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