(no subject)

[complicatedliar]

Who: Agony Aunt Agatha (a mask cunningly worn by Loki and Leto)
Broadcast: Fleetwide text
Action: None
When: Right now

[Attached picture: A friendly, smiling, white-haired old lady. She's got the kind of face you can trust, radiating good humor and worldly reasonableness.]

Hello, intrepid explorers and darling drifters!

I know you're far from home and all your friends, family, and other loved ones. Your Agony Aunt Agatha is here to listen to your troubles and give you sage advice. I've lived a lot of years and seen a lot of things--and trust me, your problems have a solution, no matter how odd or insurmountable they feel.

Write in anonymously or with your name, whatever you're more comfortable with. Auntie Agatha doesn't judge (mostly), and your secrets are safe with me!

Keep smiling, sweethearts,

Your Auntie Agatha


(OOC: Replies may come from either Loki or Leto, but will purportedly and untraceably be from delightful Aunt Agatha. Doesn't she look charming?)

Comments

text.

[astrobleme]

Can I ask a question for a friend?

text.

[complicatedliar]

Of course, I'd be happy to help out your friend.

[Resisting the temptation to write that as "friend."]

text.

[astrobleme]

[Hey, he's in need of some deniability here.]

Okay. This person - my friend - has spent their entire life believing something important about themselves. Really important. And then one day they realized that thing might not be true after all. And it's upsetting to them. I don't know what to say to them or how to comfort them.

text.

[complicatedliar]

Being upset and angry is very natural in such a situation. The key is finding a productive way to express those feelings. [Like murder or genocide!] Tell your friend that you sympathize with their plight and you will support their efforts at making things right. There isn't anything that can really fix this except time. [And murder.] And action.

text.

[astrobleme]

That's sensible advice. I wasn't sure if you were just messing around, but that really is sensible.

[Shinji has already killed something like half--three quarters?--or more?--of the human population by causing the apocalypse twice. He's looking for other outlets. Less deadly ones, with any luck.]

My friend has tried to do gardening and artwork, but those are only temporary solutions at best. Is there anything else you could recommend?

what is anon [text]

[bythewaves]

I think some problems are beyond all solving.

[text]

[precedented]

In that state of mind, nothing will ever be solved and stagnation awaits you.

[text]

[bythewaves]

Stagnation can be comforting, in its own way. Besides, sometimes it seems that it would be better to stagnate and vanish, rather than bring trouble on others.

Re: [text]

[precedented]

A fatalistic point of view. How can you say you only bring trouble to others?

Are you a mind reader to know what troubles they have?

[text]

[bythewaves]

Because that is all I have brought, it seems. So it was foretold, and so it has been.

[voice]

[summerschild]

You're not my aunt.

[ text ]

[precedented]

Do you want one?

[summerschild]

I don't think so. I already have Aunt Lysa.

[precedented]

You can have more than one.

[summerschild]

No, I can't. They all died. [What a cheery child.] Why is there only a picture of you? Instead of a video?

Text;

[onlyanapple]

...Betty White?

[precedented]

Yes

[ Whoever that is. ]

[onlyanapple]

...

REALLY Betty White? Because I'm pretty sure she's still on Earth.

[complicatedliar]

Just like you are, kiddo?

[onlyanapple]

Wow. One thing I am definitely not is a "kiddo."

And that didn't actually answer anything.

text.

[fuga]

Who would offer secrets to a woman that claims to be a false relation? It is foolish.

text.

[complicatedliar]

You come from a very literal place, don't you.

text.

[fuga]

perhaps. it is no business of yours.

text.

[complicatedliar]

You're taking a lot of effort to come to my house and tell me things aren't my business. Are you okay, dear?

text.

[fuga]

You made this post demanding people share problems that are no business of yours, claiming things that you have no right to. Perhaps you should seek assistance for your twisted mental state.