003; video;

[theirinurpants]

Who: Alistair and YOU?
Broadcast: Video; fleetwide
Action: Mmmmmaybe????
When: Today

Right, I know everyone's going on and on about the masks and whatnot - and don't get me wrong, the air down there on that moon is filthy! It's really shocking, in all honesty.

But if you can get past the mask things and the poisonous air, there's this thing. It's a game. It's called... paint ball. And it's amazing! [ Alistair's face lights up with boyish excitement. ] You form teams, and lob globs of paint at each other! The team that scores the most globs on the other teams wins when time is called.

This is the best thing ever! Who wants to come play with me?

Comments

[bryces_pup]

They shoot the stuff out of guns. That's going to sting a fair bit.

[theirinurpants]

Well... I mean...

Okay, okay, you have a point. But full plate probably isn't necessary!

[bryces_pup]

I was thinking more just my gauntlets. And perhaps my greaves, too. Though I do feel like I've neglected that armor. It's been sitting in a corner in my room, gathering dust. It was made just for me, too. Down to the ridiculous helmet.

[theirinurpants]

Ridiculous helmet? Well, now I want to see it.

[bryces_pup]

[A pained sigh.]

Of course you do. One moment.

[She's gone for a minute. When she returns, she shows him the helm in question in all its over-the-top glory.]

[theirinurpants]

[ He laughs at the sight of it. Naturally. ]

Can you even see out of that?

[bryces_pup]

Barely! And look at this... floofy plume thing on it. I look ridiculous! And I'll have you know that a certain king commissioned this for me and I am quite certain he was laughing, too. [Alistair gets a glower for it. It might not have been him him who ordered its creation but he's the closest Alistair around, so...]

[theirinurpants]

I had it made?

[ He blinks in surprise, and then laughs sheepishly. ]

All right, that might be something I'd do.

[bryces_pup]

[HUFF.]

Just you - he - both of you wait. I'll get back at you both. Him for making it and you for laughing.

[theirinurpants]

To be fair, it would be very good at protecting you!

[bryces_pup]

If my enemies did not piss themselves first from laughter. Though I suppose that would give me a good opening...

[theirinurpants]

Exactly! Disarm them with laughter, and then disarm them.

[bryces_pup]

Ooooh. I do like lopping off a limb every now and then.

[theirinurpants]

It can be pretty satisfying, I'll give you that.

[bryces_pup]

Especially heads. [She smiles - perhaps a bit too cheerfully for the subject in question.] Nothing vents frustration better than lopping off a genlock's head and watching it roll.

[theirinurpants]

The genlocks are particularly good for that.

[bryces_pup]

They're just the right height.

[She sighs, almost wistfully.]

You know, while I'm glad the Blight's over, I do miss killing darkspawn a bit.

[theirinurpants]

It's a lot easier than running a country.

[bryces_pup]

All too true. And a lot more fun. Usually.

[Her smile fades a bit, though not entirely.]

But, you have to admit... the fun you get when running a country is infinitely better.

[theirinurpants]

I dunno, I haven't really had much fun lately. Not since the big celebration, anyway.

[bryces_pup]

Oh no, more fun killing darkspawn, I meant. Not ruling. [She scrunches her nose.]

[theirinurpants]

Oh, yes, I suppose, though I don't think I'll be doing much more of that.

[bryces_pup]

You... never know? Some might decide to pop into the castle, say hello for old times' sake?

[theirinurpants]

That'd be almost a relief at this point.

[bryces_pup]

And quite perfect. You'd get to kill darkspawn, everyone will be impressed and go "ooh, look at our strong, handsome king, killing those terrible darkspawn! what would we do without him?"