driftfleet | [snuggle up real close everyone]

[That's a shame, because Kurt's hand begins to slow as she rambles. In the beginning it's mostly surprise that technology like that is used for good purposes; he'd heard rumors McCoy had rigged up something similar in his laboratory of horrors, to take the untrustworthy human equation out of things, both in terms of keeping the unborn alive and having easy access to tweak before their unfortunate birth. Too many of the machines the X-Men had taken from the ruins of Apocalypse's strongholds had been far beyond their ken, but there had been holding tubes that could have supported fetal development. Jean had confirmed having eggs harvested from her when she was held captive, but they'd taken samples of everything when she was being processed for the breeding pits. And if McCoy'd had that technology--if Sinister had that technology, as they suspected, why keep the pits at all? (He knows why.)

His hand stops entirely when she shifts onto the topic of relationships, his brain flat refusing to parse any of it. Not even refusing to believe Wrath's anything but mistaken (that will come), but his mind flat refusing the puzzle clicking together because he can't. Erik can't be someone he can't trust, even when he's not Kurt's Erik and he should know better. It can't make sense when he thinks about his own Erik, how he'd cradle the photographs of Charles Xavier like they were his infant son's fragile head. He'd named his son after Charles, teamed them after the man.

(Deep down, hidden beneath the surge of nameless fear and shock, is a tiny spark of relief mixed with regret, because he could have told Erik after all. He could have told his mentor how his mother knew Destiny, and not had to pretend not to know her face.)

Kurt swallows hard, because Wrath is still there and expecting an answer. It comes quietly, more strangled in his throat than he'd like.] We don't.. There's nothing like that in my world.

[Wrath eyes Kurt with alarm.]

You look like you're gonna throw up. Do I need to get you something? Did you eat something bad?

[Does not even occur to her that the contents of the conversation could have upset him. How could any of this be upsetting?]

[Kurt shakes his head, even uncertain as to how much a lie that is. He feels like throwing up in reaction to the flood of emotions; he won't, because he's an X-Man dammit (Erik named them after Charles.) He knew this Erik was different, hard to forget with the massive age difference between the two men, but this amount of difference rattles the trust Kurt wasn't aware he'd placed in the man. His silence on the relationship is understandable, the world he came from isn't that much different than Kurt's own (he thought), but if he could hide that then what else is he?

He shakes his head, remembering a moment after doing it that he repeats his gestures. Sloppy, stupid. His mother taught him better.] I'll be fine, Wrath. I will. We just.. we simply don't have that in my world. I suppose you've been taking a bed a caveman, darling. [The endearment slips out, and a muscle jumps in his jaw when it does. He follows it with a smile, a very bright one for someone who just looked like they got slapped by a plant of wood.]

[Everything about this situation feels wrong, suddenly. It's alarming. And that smile? Even more alarming. What is even happening? The desire to just blindly accept everything Kurt says wars briefly with her instincts. It's not a pretty fight. It's that strange, bright smile that seals the deal.]

Don't bullshit me, Kurt.

[Maybe she's wrong. Maybe this is just him being upset about replicators, though that makes little sense. But if she's wrong, she will apologize.]

[He calls her darling and then she reminds him of Linda. A heartbeat later and he realizes it isn't just Linda she reminds him of; he's always had a habit of drifting toward people who would call him on his crap. It's still unexpected enough to wipe the smile right from his face, Kurt shifting on his feet.

He's tempted to tell her that all Darkholmes do is bullshit, but he's never lied to her and the prospect of making her think he has is remarkably painful. So instead he offers a weak truth, his stomach turning.] I told you, my world is very different from yours. We don't have.. any of that.

[Long pause.]

Well yeah. I already know you don't have uterine replicators. Charles told me.

[Wait a fucking minute.]

Wait, are you saying your universe doesn't have homosexual couples?

[Are you even fucking serious, she has to be misunderstanding something.]

Edited 2016-05-31 12:28 (UTC)

My universe doesn't have anything any more, it's dead. [The admitting is too flat not to be hurting him, despite his expression being stone-faced.

It also isn't what she asked, and though he's well aware her back isn't what it should be Kurt maintains a healthy fear of what she could still do to him. Sighing heavily, he gestures with his tail.] What do you want me to tell you, Wrath? No, it didn't. Not if they were smart, or strong enough that it didn't matter what you were fucking so long as you made some effort to pass your genes on. That's what it all boiled down to, Apocalypse and Weapon Omega's rule; you survived if you were strong enough, if you passed that strength on to children. Hardly any room there to love someone you could create a child with, much less--

[He stops then, closing his mouth abruptly enough that his teeth click together.]

Edited (I thought of more. Stop me before I edit this five million times.) 2016-06-01 13:17 (UTC)

[No, this has just confused her even more. She sees that Kurt is upset. She would like him to stop being upset, but if she's not even sure why that's happening, it's hard to figure out how to fix it.

The best she can do for the moment is squeeze his hand because she's at least trying to understand what he's getting at.]

That sounds really awful. And I'm really sorry. [Another hand squeeze.]

But I don't understand what Charles and Erik here have to do with that. Your universe sucks. This is a much better place, even if it's not great.

[He squeezes her hand back both times, grateful for the tiny act of affection.]

Erik was married to my sister in my world. He--Alright, I'm surprised in the least that any version of him would chose a lover that would give me fits but.. [He pauses, pressing his lips together as he tries to make sense of his whirling thoughts. There's something tickling at the edge of them that he can't quite put together.] The first thing I think is, 'if something this big is different, then what else? How different are they both from the men they were in my world and can I trust them at all?'

But.. but then I think about how much that man meant to Erik, my Erik. After Xavier's death he lived to keep that dream alive. He named his son after him, named my team after him. And then I don't know what to think. [And that is about the same level of honesty that Kitty's gotten out of him since they came here. Maybe more so, because Wrath never knew him before.]

But the Erik here isn't that Erik. [That's important. She gets the whole mutliverse thing.] Why does him having Charles as his boyfriend bother you? Charles is great.

[But she gets the whole trust thing, because it is... if you've had a tough time, it can carry over.] For what it's worth, I trust both of them. But maybe it's easier for me because everyone here is new to me. I don't have any like... baggage from my world, not like that.

It sounds like Charles was really important to Erik in your world. And... it's probably not even your business how important if Erik never told you. Love... it's not like good rare earths, right? It's not limited. Because you give a lot of love to someone doesn't mean you have less to give to other people. Not if you're a good person with a big heart.

[She squeezes his hand again.]

Because I don't know Xavier. I know his legacy, but this is the first version of the man I've met. [That's the easy part of what he's feeling, protectiveness over someone he shouldn't be this attached to. He and this Erik haven't spoken much, but each time has reinforced the resemblances between the two. He'll admit its a little ridiculous to worry about the most powerful man (in his world) having a broken heart, but that's what Kurt did. He protected Magneto--and failed, when the man needed him the most.

He hears the rest of Wrath's words without entirely processing them in the moment, right until she starts talking about love. His face lifts slightly to look her in the eyes. The point she's trying to make isn't really puncturing his stubbornness about Charles and Erik, because he's seen love turn toxic and poison the people involved. He was raised by his mother, after all; Raven's taste in men was horrible. But the point does nestle in right next to something Kitty'd said to him, when he finally let himself open up a little more. 'One love doesn't have to replace another.' Dammit, no, he doesn't have time to open that can of worms (yes he does. He has nothing but time now, and that terrifies him.)

Kurt sighs heavily, and lifts Wrath's hand to kiss her knuckles.] Will it hurt your back to look at me if I sit on the floor, or shall I just get myself a chair anyway? I think this might be a long conversation.

[Conversation is good. Conversation means people trying to understand each other. She considers the physical aspect though.]

If it's gonna be a long conversation, might be better to go back to one of our rooms so I can lay down.

[Stupid back. Stupid body. She feels bad about it, but he's being pragmatic and she owes it to him to do the same.]

[For his part, Kurt just nods and holds out his other hand for her. No one comes out of war without physical damage; he just got lucky that most of his was superficial. Benefit of being a teleporter with good reflexes.]

I can 'port us. Would you prefer your room or mine?

[Wrath takes his hand without hesitation. She trusts Kurt.. She'll never hesitate.]

You pick. Whichever will make you feel safer.

[His tail loops around her waist, another point of contact because it makes him feel steadier.]

Yours. Just in case you feel the need to toss me out on my ear. [With a brief grin he teleports them both, with all the brimstone and stomach-lurching that comes with ducking into another dimension (temporarily, too quickly for a human eye to see). When they reappear Kurt's watching her carefully. It's habit, when he teleports people who aren't members of his team.] Alright?

You planning on being that dumb? [She can't recall ever throwing anyone out of her room. She recalls some nasty arguments, and she recalls people walking away because she doesn't believe in accepting bullshit or being anything but frank about it, but she'd always prefer to fighting until it's done.]

Yeah, I'm fine. [But there's a touch of shakiness to her voice, because the instant of vertigo makes her remember the fall, and--no, this is not a thing that she has time for. She clenches one hand into a fist and closes her eyes for a moment. Solid. She's not falling.] Everything's green.

I've been accused of many things, but being a particularly intelligent man isn't one of them. [And when compared to the likes of Henry McCoy, he isn't. Kurt's a resourceful man with good genetics and a little bit of cleverness.]

You're being sick, that's better than a lot of people. [He still keeps his hands on hers as a steadying influence, because hearing the tremor in her words means they translate in his mind as 'No, but I will be.'] Well enough to sit down? It might help.

You don't have to be smart. You just have to not be dumb. [It totally makes sense in her head.]

[Like hell she's copping to the real problem here; too much to explain.] Yeah, I can sit. [Which she does, on her bed, though she does lean on him to do so. Having something to do, even if it's just grabbing her pillows and getting settled, helps get her evened out.] I'm okay, Kurt. You get yourself comfortable.

[You can't fuss over her as a way of avoiding this conversation.]

[It makes sense to him, though the devil if he could figure out how to vocalize it. He also has the sinking feeling that he is being an idiot; scratch that, he knows he is about some of it. Erik is a smart man with good instincts; better than his, when it comes to women. Lovers. Rogue was dangerous too, but never to him.]

Alright. [He still fusses a little, mostly just helping her sit and adjust pillows until its clear she has that part under control. He settles into a sitting position, bare feet dangling off the bed until he's brushed the dirt off with his tail. Then he tucks his legs under him and proceeds to stare at said tail as it twitches on the bed, as though the thing doesn't belong to him.] ..I have no idea how to have this conversation.

[Wrath settles comfortably and watches him. She stretched out her legs to rest one foot lightly against his knee.]

Okay.

You can probably start by figuring out if your problem is with gay people in general, with Erik being gay or bi, or with Erik being gay or bi with Charles.

[This woman does not fuck around.]

Or maybe all of them.

[No she doesn't. Kurt closes his eyes and tilts his head back, ignoring the tiny voice in the back of his head that screams at leaving his throat exposed. This is Wrath; if she didn't outright kill the Stalker for threatening one of their own, she won't tear out his throat before he's even spoken.]

Charles. [That's the easy part to untangle.] In his world, my mother is his adopted sister, and that doesn't incite a vast amount of trust. My mother was.. she fought to save humanity in our world, but in at least two others she's taken the opposite side. In every world she's primarily concerned with the well being of herself and the few she considers family, and to hell with anything or anyone that stands in her way. [Which is why he immediately proposed security measures against the one in the Fleet.]

He grew up with her.

[She listens carefully.]

I can understand that would make you paranoid. But this isn't the Charles you know, and being around someone a lot doesn't mean that you are going to be just like them either.

I think before you do anything dumb, maybe you should get to know him.

I didn't know him at all in our world. My world is the way it is because he died young; I've only heard about him from my Erik and Xavier's step-brother, Cain. [His mouth tightens when he mentions Avalon's pacifist monk.] Strange thing about that brother; he told us himself that he used to be a terror of a man. But when we met him, he'd developed such an aversion to violence that he had a fatal stroke when Avalon was attacked and I tried to goad him to fight. Maybe just coincidence.

[Kurt opens his eyes, staring up at the ceiling.] Maybe not. I know that people aren't that different between worlds; I recognize my mother in the Mystique that's here. I recognized my Erik in this one, and myself in all the other versions of me that I've met. I don't recognize my world's McCoy in the one that's here, and that makes me suspicious most of all.

[Level look.] If you're trying to say something Kurt, fucking say it. I get confused when people don't say what they actually mean.

I think you're making a mistake in looking for the similarities. Because you'll see what you think is there and ignore what's different because you think you know what to expect.

Let people be who they are instead of who you expect them to be.

I'm confused, darling. I don't know what to think, and I can't trust my guts because my instinctive reaction is.. not fair. Not right, and not who I want to be. [Which is him trying to ease into a 'yes' answer for the first part of her primary question, because its a difficult thing to admit. He's ashamed of the fear reaction he'd learned over the years, because he should have known better.]

I don't know that I can do that with--Anyone who had a counterpart in my world. They're too powerful, and I didn't outlive the rest of my team by being a trusting man. [There's a pause between 'out' and 'live' in which Kurt twitches slightly, just enough for his leg to tense under her foot.] Looking for what I know will keep me safe, as well as the rest of us.

[snuggle up real close everyone]

extra butter on mine, please

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There was supposed to be a 'not' between 'you're' and 'being', oy.

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