driftfleet | (no subject)

Who: Itty Bitty Obi-Wan + You
Broadcast: Y
Action: SS Huntress
When: Now

[ Video ]

[ The feed shakes for a few minutes before it centers on a young thirteen year old boy. He has the trademark padawan braid and robes as he sits on his knees in front of the camera. His expression is quiet and muted, though it seems like he hasn't had much sleep. His eyes are red-rimmed and tired. ]

Hello. If you could tell me if this ship is heading to Coruscant, I would be grateful. If not, I'd be happy to earn my way there through any duties you deem necessary.

[ He hesitates, pausing for far too long, biting on his lip. ] And if you -- you have seen Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn.

Thank you.

[ Action ]

[ Obi-Wan weaves himself through the ship, his shoulders hunched and his saber in a tight white-knuckled grip. Surely Qui-Gon wouldn't have left him here . . . not after coming back. Not after their discussion.

Then again, what rights did Obi-Wan even possess?

He tugs the hood over his face and keeps a wary eye on everyone who came close. This was a strange vessel and their responses got even more confusing. Best to keep to himself until he got to Coruscant. ]

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[ His expression tightens further and he doesn't reply. ]

[ He doesn't have to say it, even if Master Tahl isn't mentioned. He forgets, sometimes, of all the people Obi-Wan has lost before he came into the picture.

He could have said the Master-like thing to say - something about the Force working in mysterious ways. But screw that. ]

I know what it must feel like. People die, whether no matter what we do to prevent that.

She didn't have to die.

[ This is not a comfortable conversation to have but he's determined to stick with it - like his Master had stuck with him. ]

But she did. She is gone, and there's nothing you can do about it. But making sure no one has to go through what you're feeling right now, that is something you can do.

[ Obi-Wan blinks furious tears from his eyes, looking anywhere but at Anakin, his hands balled into tight fists. ]

Listen to me.

[ He grips Obi-Wan's shoulders, almost shaking him. His throat refuses to work until he swallows, breathes and attune himself with the Force. ]

The anger, the sorrow you feel-- [ His voice cracks then. he killed them all he shouldn't have done that it's not the jedi way ] It will fade. You will come to love others as much as you had loved her. They won't replace her but you'll remember loving her and passing on her words and wisdom as your own. That's how you honor her death.

[ He looks up. ]

Honor. . . ?

[ He nods firmly. Conviction now, doubts later. That's always worked for him. ]

[ Honoring Cerasi. Obi-Wan isn't sure he could do that. She died and even though her sacrifice changed the course of history and the fate of Melida/Daan . . . she had just been a girl. Someone his age, dying. ]

I was there. When she died. I held her -- and nothing made sense. I couldn't stay there anymore. They didn't want me.

[ He paused, held in his breath. His hands are on Obi-Wan's small shoulders and he pulls the boy - his Master from another time into a hug. He notes that Obi-Wan comes up to his chest. How strange it is to be the one comforting when he remembers having their positions reversed when his mother died. When Darra... He holds on to Obi-Wan tight, re-strengthen the bond the share in the Force. ]

[ He stiffens before he digs his hands into Anakin's cloak and lets out a tiny wordless sob. He hadn't had the chance to grieve. Everything had happened so fast and then he had to leave. ]

It's alright. You'll be alright.

[ he's never been the one to comfort, always the one to be comforted. it seems strange now that the roles have been reverse. he waits, patiently. for as long as obi-wan needs to cry. ]

[ He nods weakly, his head hung in shame. ]

[ he tilts obi-wan's head up. crying kids. awful. ]

It's only human to feel.

Feeling didn't help her. Or me. That's what Master Qui-Gon said.

Master Qui-Gon- [ a beat; he can't reconcile this obi-wan's qui-gon with the image he has. ] I'm sure he has his reasons for saying that. Maybe feeling doesn't help her but it's only natural to grieve for the dead.

And... I don't think he would have meant it that way if he knew how you're feeling now.

[ He nods, wiping his face with his sleeve. ]

I have to become a Jedi. I can't let her down.

She's part of the Force now. As long as you remember that, she'll always be with you. She'll always be guiding you.

And ... don't be too hard on yourself, Obi-Wan.

I'll . . . try. Thank you, Master Skywalker.