driftfleet | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Who: Everyone messed up by the dragon plot, and visitors
Broadcast: N/A
Action: Blue Fish's clinic!
When: All throughout the Solrius dragon plot and through the space flight to the next destination.

[So several RPG characters, a dragon, and two messianic figures walk into a planet.

Everything is suffering and tears, there's a lot of dead people, there's no punchline. But, hey, for the survivors, the Blue Fish's clinic is treating wounds and generally being a decent place to rest and recover and pray you don't see a dragon again. And for those who weren't involved, there's enough people bedridden here that there may just be someone you want to visit.]

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[she looks shocked for a moment, reminded of something she still feels sick thinking about. she takes a breath.]

...Do you know how much I would have hated myself if I had hurt somebody as badly as he hurt you?

I know. That's exactly why I wanted to stop them. Before they did worse.

... I already know I failed.

I don't care about you failing or whatever, I...

You should have been thinking about more than just them.

Edited 2016-09-13 02:57 (UTC)

... I know. But I... I can't leave someone I care about like that. I had to do something.

No, you didn't have to, that's the entire point! You could have waited long enough to have a better plan, you could have kept yourself safe so I wouldn't have to come across you and think—

[pushes a hand through her hair, stressed]

I thought you were dead when I first saw you, you know. And when we were going back to the Fleet, I kept thinking I'm not going to be fast enough, she's going to d-die.

[her voice cracks.]

[... and just like that, her heart breaks. What is she supposed to do? If she were to leave it alone, because she couldn't do anything-

Do what you want. I'm staying here.

No. She can't ever be that person again. She has to try to help those she can help, those that she cares about. And she thought... She truly thought she could do it. And when she did, she could be proud- She'd have the power to save her friends. If Nyssa were to control Opal again, then... Then Nightingale could fix it. She could save her.

But she couldn't, she didn't have the power, she failed. She got beaten horribly. She almost died. Opal isn't a fighter, so Nightingale wants the power to protect her, but was protected by her instead. And now, she's upset, and crying, and that's unacceptable. She never wants to hurt Opal like this. But... What can she possibly do?

(Dimly, she recalls having nearly this exact conversation with Bluebird. That time, she was on the other side, arguing much like Opal is now. She knows how much of a hypocrite she's being.)

She wants to just pull Opal close and hug her tightly, but... she can't. She can't move her arms, which is kind of Opal's point, isn't it? She ran in with a half-assed plan, and hurt this much for it.

... If she can't move her arms, she'll try the next best thing, and a warm breeze suddenly flits around Opal, pressing against her shoulders- The closest she can do to holding her like this.]

I'm sorry.

[What else can she say to that?]

[she feels it, and she swallows.]

I don't want an apology. I want you to promise me you aren't going to do something like this again - not alone.

[... She remembers this part from that talk with Bluebird, too. The big fight they had, because Bluebird had promised, then broken that promise. If Nightingale promises... She doesn't want to do that to Natalie. Can she promise if she's not sure she can go through with it?

But... She shouldn't try to go alone. Natalie's right. She always had a party, a team, people to fall back on and help her when she's not enough alone. She's beating herself up for not being strong enough to do this solo- To do it like her parents would- But she doesn't want to be anything like them. She should rely on her friends.]

... I... I promise.

[She's going to do her best to keep this promise, at least, and whatever happens, happens.]

[she takes a deep breath, rubs at her face. she seems a little bit calmer, even if she's still upset.]

...Okay. Thank you.

[She makes a small noise of affirmation, trying to steady her breathing from that emotional roller coaster just now.

... The silence is uncomfortable. She doesn't want that anymore. She wants to hear Opal, and wants to hear her normal voice, the cute, sarcastic Opal. What should she say? What can she say to make her happy? In the first place, why is she having this conversation when painkillers have her brain stuffed full of cotton?]

You know... When I was on the ground, I was thinking about a lot, but... My biggest regret was that I never took you up on that offer you made.