[Closed]

[exothermia]

Who: Erik, Charles and Raven
Broadcast: N/A
Action: a birthday on the Iskaulit
When: November 3rd

It was some time in the early morning, between fits of sleep, that Erik realised he was fifty-three. He had known it was coming for days, in the back of his mind, but it strikes him suddenly when he wakes from another unremembered dream and knows it must be nearly morning. The knowledge sinks into him like a stone, having broken the surface just as suddenly. It doesn't take long for the grief and loneliness to seize his heart again, always waiting for a moment to strike. He curls up under his blanket in the dark and wills himself to be silent, unseen.

His last birthday had been a happier affair. They were never grand or exuberant, but he didn't need or want them to be. Having a family to celebrate with was gift enough to Erik's mind. He vividly remembers the paper party hats Nina had made for the three of them to wear, the breakfast Magda had served up before he had to go to work. It was shocking to think he'd almost become used to it, after those initial few years where he hadn't been the most receptive to Magda's insistence that they do something. Even just a dinner.

Now he was to have his birthday in outer space, far from Earth and where his family lay beneath it. It was hardly worth acknowledging... just like all the years before they'd entered his life. His broken heart begs to differ, though, so he has to give it its due.

After a while, he wipes his face and gets up. Charles wants to spend time with him today, so he sets about having an early shower and shave (down to faint stubble, at the least). Another couple of hours listening to the terrible music the communicators have on offer, in the company of his fluff slug, was enough to settle his turbulent feelings into something manageable.

By the time Charles knocks on his door and they head to the Iskaulit, he's put himself back together.

Comments

[exothermia]

[Erik tilts his head, looking up at the greenery himself.] Maybe for similar reasons. People wanted something to grow here, something less artificial. So they decided to do something about it. I've seen people tending the gardens, when I've visited before.

[axiomed]

It's relaxing.

[ He shrugs his shoulders. ] We all look for bright spots.

[exothermia]

Mmm. [He sets his empty plate down, resting his hands in his lap.] I'm more at ease in metal spaces than most, but even I need to be around nature sometimes.

[It's something he'd never thought of, until he'd spent long periods of time without. Even the camps, horrible as they had been, hadn't cut him off from the living world. And living so near the woods in Poland, even the gardens at the Institute, had soothed his heart when he needed it most.]

[axiomed]

You've always seemed to enjoy it.

[exothermia]

[A bit dry.]

I didn't when I was a teenager.

[axiomed]

Well, we all struggled with such things when we were teenagers.

[ Granted, Erik had other things on his mind. ]

[exothermia]

I'm sure some don't. You have plenty of students who love being outdoors.

[axiomed]

Well, yes. But I meant sometimes we don't know what we care about until much later. Epiphanies aren't easy to reach when you're younger.

[exothermia]

[He stares at Charles for a moment, before he huffs softly. That's a truth they both know.] Try telling a child that, though.

[axiomed]

I try not to. I know lost causes when I see them. Besides, it's better for them to reach that conclusion for themselves.

[exothermia]

Yes. It will take them much longer than they realise.

[As it had for him. Even then, it kept changing through the years, and even now stands uncertain in the winds of fate.]

[axiomed]

Even if it does . . . the school will always be there for them.

[exothermia]

Yeah.

[He believes that. He's walked those halls, seen the security and hope in the eyes of those young people under Charles's care. If those students were to come back a year, five years, twenty years after leaving, they would still find a helping hand. It's strange to remember how little he thought of it years ago, when only defiance and forging ahead was on his mind.]

[axiomed]

[ He smiles as he cuts a little bit of his cake. ]

Is there anything you'd like to do today?

[exothermia]

[The question comes as something of a surprise, and Erik shifts a little, uncertain.]

I didn't... have anything in mind. [He'd intended to approach it as any other day, albeit one with a more hollow feeling. Now, though, his expectations have been overturned.]

[axiomed]

[ His smile remains. ]

Which is fine too. But if something comes to mind, let me know.

[exothermia]

This is already more than I could ask for.

[axiomed]

[ Charles surveys him. ]

That doesn't mean you can't ask.

[exothermia]

[He knows that... in theory. In practice, it's much harder, not least of which because he doesn't tend to ask for much at all. Erik rubs at his chin slightly, pushing the fork around his plate with a finger.]

I know. I'll let you know. [His glance lands on the drinks, and he tilts his head in that direction.] What are those?

[axiomed]

Alcohol. Some wine and vodka. Nothing special, I'm afraid.

[exothermia]

Does it need to be? [After consideration he takes the wine bottle.] I don't habitually have either of them, so they're uncommon enough.

[axiomed]

Some things should be special.

[ He leaves it at that though. ] I'll pour you a glass.

[exothermia]

[Erik pauses, before handing the bottle over to Charles instead.]

Sometimes it's the act that makes it special, instead.

[axiomed]

Or the people.

[ He dutifully pours the wine into the glass before handing it back to Erik. ]

[exothermia]

[Erik takes it with a murmur of thanks, eyeing the liquid in the glass. What they're doing here, for all that it's simple, is raised to the level of special because of what it means. It has to be evident.]

We could play chess, later.