Video. the ramblings of a drunk british man.

[edwinjarvis]

Who: Jarvis and you, valentine. ;)
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Tourist/Iskaulit, wherever you catch him
When: Valentine's Day of course!!!

[Jarvis here, ready to be — drunk? Perhaps just a little. He is actually doing a PSA whether he realizes it or not, looking disapprovingly at his wine glass. He's rosy-cheeked and his tie is the slightest bit crooked. Just the slightest. And he is currently abandoning his coat because it is clearly getting hot in the Tourist kitchen.]

Oh, myyyyy goodnessgracious, I think — I... Yes, the wrong bottle, this is... the wrong bottle. It's just a little purple...er than the other I was supposed to take from the shelf. I should have known better; I can't read —

[He looks intently at the liquor bottle, marked in alien writing that their augments certainly can't translate.]

I can't read this, period. I think I accidentally drank one of the more potent... bottles...

[... hiccup]

... Not the whole bottle, mind you, I'm not a barbarian.

Clearly two glasses is downright diabolical. I apologize, Miss Nami, I believe this is one of the newer imports. I will have to credit it out in take — ...take it out in credits. Goodness, it's warm in here. I'm going to go to the Iskaulit, since I fancy it cooler there... Cookies!! [Yes, that's as sudden as it seems, and he claps his hands together.] I'll make some cookies, because it is Valentine's Day, and cookies have to be made, and I haven't the supplies nor the mind-power for chocolate... anything, really. And I certainly have nothing to do on Valentine's Day, no sir — or ma'am. I am quite freed up by... by the light-years-away... -ness, of my predicament. Very much free to bake indeed. I don't mind at all. I — it's very... un-routine of me, to have no one to bake for on this particular date.

[He huffs.]

If you don't have a valentine, please stop by the Space Bar kitchen, I will have cookies so you can at least eat cookies. It's completely unnecessary to have a single valentine — it doesn't need to be a... lady or fellow you fancy, either. I'll have you know I made my classmates biscuits every year, save for — goodness, that time in... 1925...? When I came down with the flu. What a terrible February that was. I thought I'd gone — bubonic.

..... I'm talking quite a lot.

If you'll excuse me, I need my apron. Where did I put my...

[...... He's wandered off.]

Comments

[mucked]

Oh, shut it. Pillock. No one could replace you and your pavlovas.

[edwinjarvis]

[He looks absolutely touched and surprised.

The liquor probably plays into it, but still.]

You like my pavlovas?

[mucked]

Americans always muck up the meringue. [ deep! breath! you can do this, carter. you can be nice. ] Same goes for an Eton mess.

[edwinjarvis]

America does have concerning culinary practices, I've noticed.

[Does it help the compliments if we talk crap together?]

Just imagine how terribly space will muck it up.

Getting ingredients properly here is a nightmare.

[mucked]

And yet alcohol appears to be nigh universal. There's a lesson in that.

[edwinjarvis]

Universal and potent.

[He's starting to think it's good Howard didn't stay long.]

[mucked]

Save us a bottle. You know, I ought to be proper miffed you waited until I was out of the fleet to get drunk.

[edwinjarvis]

My apologies.

Should I ever accidentally indulge in extremely potent space alcohol, you will be right beside me.

[mucked]

Sarcasm doesn't always become you, Mister Jarvis. I'm serious! [ huff. ] I find myself with a dearth of associates who can enjoy a glass of middling ersatz whiskey. It seems as though every second person in the fleet is somehow impervious to its effects.

[edwinjarvis]

Such a terrible fate to befall you.

I usually leave the drinking to Mr. Stark.

As well as the gambling.

And the flirting.

And the questionable opinions that should probably never leave one's mouth.

[mucked]

[ howard. now, there's a man she wouldn't mind sharing a drink with. not today, obviously. today is earmarked for something else entirely. but she misses that camaraderie. it's never been something she's chased from mister jarvis; never needed it, before now.

but here they are. adjusting. ]

What were you trying to drink? Before you accidentally ingested alien spirits.

[edwinjarvis]

One of the simpler drinks available -- it was a bit fruity, and much of it had been destroyed in the raid. I had saved some of the last bottles, but I'm afraid they looked quite like the new batch.

... And I'd forgotten my glasses in my room...

[TRAGIC]

[mucked]

So that excuses the first mouthful. Less so every one that followed.

[edwinjarvis]

[He's quiet on his end, with a bit of weight behind it.]

I suppose that's true.

[Perhaps it was just easy to shrug and drink the glass. It's hardly a concern.]