06 - video

[winn]

Who: Winn Schott and you
Broadcast: Video
Action: Tourist
When: Friday

[ there's something off about winn when the feed turns on. something different from all his other broadcasts. it may take a second to spot it but once you realize what it is it becomes glaringly obvious: there's not a hint of happiness anywhere on his face. his eyes, his lips, his nose, it looks like every last bit of joy has been drained from his features, so even when his lips do stretch lightly upwards, despite his dry eyes it feels more like watching him sob than seeing him smile. ]

Margaery's gone home. [ he has no way of knowing that. she could have been kidnapped to another world, one where she would have no protective big brother to introduce her to superheroes and feminism, to embroider with her and teach her science. but he chooses to hang onto that thought, to believe that she's gone back to the family he knows she so desperately missed despite never letting her pain show. he clears his throat. ] If any of her friends wanna come by for a toast and some stories, I'll be on the Tourist all day.

[ he has been on the tourist since he realized she disappeared, curled up in his bed, shut down. this is the most he's said since, and it feels almost like an outer body experience. he clears his throat again, and nods at the camera before killing the feed. ]

Comments

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[winn]

It's cute that you think so.

[ he hits go. game on. ]

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[spacebro]

[Mon-El's car goes VERY FAST and immediately drives into the the side of the wall and wrecks.]

Hm. It goes slower when it does that.

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[winn]

[ we have a snort! I repeat, a snort has been detected! ]

Very perceptive.

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[spacebro]

[That's a pretty good thing to hear considering how he found him. He points at the screen and then at Winn. Serious.] Do over. I've got this.

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[winn]

You got nothing.

[ with a few clicks he starts recording their next game. he's going to make a montage of mon-el's greatest crashes. ]

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[spacebro]

[Wow. Cruel.]

I've got you in my mirror that shows me the view from behind. [He manages to make it through a curve without going into the wall! And then...he does.]

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[winn]

[ you must pay for your arrogance. ]

Rear-view mirror. And in your dreams.

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[spacebro]

[Be gentle, bro.]

That is faster to say. Third time is the time!

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[winn]

Charm. And only if by charm you mean spectacular loss.

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[spacebro]

I am going to charm your car into a wall this time.

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[winn]

Not unless you learn actual magic.

[ the banter feels so good after all the days of shutdown depression. it's kinda like mon-el is saving him from drowning a second time. ]

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[spacebro]

[He might need to. He isn't in the lead but he is doing better at not crashing this time!] Why is it so hard to make the car go fast and not crash at the same time?

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[winn]

You have to crawl before you can run, young grasshopper. If it makes you feel any better, Kara and I have been playing this for years and she still can't beat me.

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[spacebro]

Grasshopper? [Foolishly looking from the screen to Winn as his car slides off the track, but it was in the grass so he can maneuver it back on the track!]

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[winn]

Movie reference.

[ he's not that okay, he doesn't really feel like going into a babbling explanation. ]

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[spacebro]

[He nods, trying to keep his car on the track while speeding up.] Did Kara mention that she and I are together? [Best time, right?]

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[winn]

[ his car stays on the track, if you thought you could cheat your way to victory you are sorely mistaken, sir! it's not exactly a shock, he's got eyes, and his kara senses are pretty sharp.

but still, there's a pang there. there's a difference between knowing and knowing. ]

No, when'd that happen? [ he's guessing about the time kara started looking all giddy. he forces his face to relax into something more smile-like. it's not a good time for him to have this talk, he's too out of it, but he's not going to turn mon-el away, either. ]

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[spacebro]

Valentine's day. I was going to tell you sooner, but I wanted to make sure it was real and then my ship collided with another one. [Stuff came up. He knows this isn't ideal either but he's surprised he waited this long.]

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[winn]

[ valentine's day. he thinks of his own valentine's day with kitty. they were so happy. feeling happy feels so far away from him right now. ]

...so I guess she liked the necklace. [ he has ample experience at smiling through his misery, so he does that now. ] Congratulations.

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[spacebro]

She did. [Mon-El has some experience with that too and has a feeling that's what's going on now. It's not the performance so much as the timing. He shifts closer, wrapping one arm around Winn's shoulders and giving him a squeeze, less worried about the game for the moment.] Thank you.

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[winn]

[ winn turns his gaze up to mon-el, and his smile is a fraction more genuine at the gesture, because he really does need the physical reassurance right now. ]

You're welcome. I hope you realize how lucky you are, she's one of the best. [ rivaled in his heart only by kitty. ]

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[spacebro]

[He'll keep it going for a bit.] I do and she really is. I want to make her happy.

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[winn]

As long as that guides you, I'm sure you will.

[ or, well, he hopes. ]

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[spacebro]

Thanks. I hope so. It's been really good. [He doesn't want to shove his happy at Winn right now, but there's been a lot of happy.]

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[winn]

I'm really happy for you.

[ and he is, even though he's not happy right now - he's happy for them. he's happy that kara finally seemed to have found what she wanted, what she needed, and he's happy for mon-el because he knows from experience what not being seen feels like. ]

I don't want details, ever.