video. sponsor drop... FLAMINGOS EVERYWHERE GOD SAVE THE QUEEN

[edwinjarvis]

Who: Jarvis and you
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: SS Tourist
When: Today!


[Jarvis had just been returning to the SS Tourist after a day of working in the water and at the bar on the Iskaulit — it's clearly the Atroma's doing, some sort of surprise for the butler that must've been quite desired... clearly... He stumbles a bit in the dark, confused, because when is the cargo bay ever dark?]

Hello? Captain??

Mr. Schott?

.... Miss Price? 

[He flicks on the main lighting system at last after a mild curse hitting his knee, and he's horrified by what he sees, as Hotel California plays muffled over the speakers. Not played by anyone on board, of course. But that's not the worst of it... No, the worst of it is that he finds himself... surrounded. By plastic...pink... flamingos.]



Oh... dear god.

... 

[He plucks up a note.]

"To Edwin Jarvis, to help with the homesickness, a kind sponsor has decided to offer an army of your favorite Earth creature..."

[He looks to the left. Flamingos. To the right. Flamingos. There's some sitting in the shuttle seats. There's one wearing one of his ties.

Jarvis wipes a hand across his forehead, looking to the floor in his shock.]

... This is the worst day of my life.

[One of the flamingos tips over and clatters.




DISCONNECTED. 


....

no, no, this is not over!!!



RECONNECTED.]



What in the bloody underworld am I supposed to do with dozens upon dozens of these?!

[hands on HIPS!!!! LECTURING THE ATROMA!!!!]

This is a sour waste of resources!! I would like a recall! Nobody wants your army of — of — hellbirds!

[... Outside of the SS Tourist, they've also peppered the ocean floor around the ship with flamingos, too.]

Comments

[namisan]

...there's a refugee camp?

[GUESS WHO HADN'T PAID MUCH ATTENTION]

[edwinjarvis]

Oh, yes, indeed there is. A small place where quite a few of the sick are located.

Unfortunately they've fallen quite ill in a lot of circles; there's even a ghost town here, where nobody is left for fear of becoming infected. If that's indeed how it all works. [He nods.] I've been a bit of a hired-on nurse of sorts. Not even that, really, but I can help with little things since the staff is spread thin.

[namisan]

[Well, that sounds delightful.]

I wonder if we were brought here because of that. The illness, that is.

[edwinjarvis]

Do you suppose so? We do have some talented minds here aboard the fleet.

Unfortunately I am not one of them, though I don't mind offering what services I have.

[namisan]

Yeah this isn't anything I can help with, either.

[But if there's actual refugee camps. Sigh.]

Well, I can always translate my comb collection to something more useful in the markets.

[edwinjarvis]

Your comb collection?

[namisan]

The hair accessories in question. I was just going to sell the leftovers.

[edwinjarvis]

Oh! Yes, well...! I would be happy to purchase some, actually.

It would be good to keep such things readily available, should my ship have anyone who would benefit from such supplies.

[namisan]

Well, I can bring the leftovers to the bar when I come in next. You can poke through them in the kitchen.

[edwinjarvis]

That sounds fabulous, thank you.

I suppose some good can come of these rather nasty sponsor drops after all.

[namisan]

Well, what's trash to one person is often a goldmine to another. My hair accessories made a bunch of people pretty happy.

[edwinjarvis]

Certainly. Have you considered hair bands, perhaps? To push your hair back.

Perhaps you can find some decent patterns...

Maybe some elegant accessories attached.

[namisan]

Mr Jarvis, are you trying to give me fashion advice?

[Amused.]

[edwinjarvis]

That entirely depends! Do you think it's good advice?

[namisan]

It's not the worst I've ever heard. But have faith when I say I have fashion covered.

[edwinjarvis]

I will hardly be one to argue otherwise.