driftfleet | video. sponsor drop... FLAMINGOS EVERYWHERE GOD SAVE THE QUEEN

Who: Jarvis and you
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: SS Tourist
When: Today!

[Jarvis had just been returning to the SS Tourist after a day of working in the water and at the bar on the Iskaulit — it's clearly the Atroma's doing, some sort of surprise for the butler that must've been quite desired... clearly... He stumbles a bit in the dark, confused, because when is the cargo bay ever dark?]

Hello? Captain??

Mr. Schott?

.... Miss Price?

[He flicks on the main lighting system at last after a mild curse hitting his knee, and he's horrified by what he sees, as Hotel California plays muffled over the speakers. Not played by anyone on board, of course. But that's not the worst of it... No, the worst of it is that he finds himself... surrounded. By plastic...pink... flamingos.]

Oh... dear god.

...

[He plucks up a note.]

"To Edwin Jarvis, to help with the homesickness, a kind sponsor has decided to offer an army of your favorite Earth creature..."

[He looks to the left. Flamingos. To the right. Flamingos. There's some sitting in the shuttle seats. There's one wearing one of his ties.

Jarvis wipes a hand across his forehead, looking to the floor in his shock.]

... This is the worst day of my life.

[One of the flamingos tips over and clatters.

DISCONNECTED.

....

no, no, this is not over!!!

RECONNECTED.]

What in the bloody underworld am I supposed to do with dozens upon dozens of these?!

[hands on HIPS!!!! LECTURING THE ATROMA!!!!]

This is a sour waste of resources!! I would like a recall! Nobody wants your army of — of — hellbirds!

[... Outside of the SS Tourist, they've also peppered the ocean floor around the ship with flamingos, too.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

You know, I'm willing to bet they would rather not be in jail in the first place.

Better than wandering the streets of Los Angeles, I can assure you.

Regardless, he's gotten his revenge. I've had to clean the grass stains from my pants.

I'm sure that's enough to satisfy him.

[Pausing a beat before she says:] So are you just going to get rid of all of them?

... Actually, I've been considering giving them to the people who live here.

I've heard they have a great enjoyment of shiny, bright things.

There's no denying that they're bright. You'll have to tell me if the locals enjoy the addition.

Edited 2017-03-17 23:13 (UTC)

Most definitely!!

Now, how've you been lately, Miss Romanoff?

Can't say I have any real complaints. Things keep going. The new world has been something.

[But nothing she really asked or enjoyed, in particular.]

It sure has, hasn't it! Have you done any extracurricular activities while you're here? Perhaps visited the temples, or the people? They have some wonderful sea food.

I'd hope so, since it's all they have. No fish, though.

Still, some very good shellfish.

Oh, yes. No fish, certainly... A shame, I love fish and chips on occasion.

But perhaps it reminds them of cannibalism in some way. They are rather fishy in some regards.

Something like that. Sometimes, you just have to accept those little cultural foibles.

That said... I wouldn't mind some fish myself.

[She smiles a little.]

The shopping is interesting, though. These people have style. Not sure it's good style, but they have it.

Well... I will not have a single utterance if you should steal away fish privately.

[HE WORKS FOR HOWARD AND WITH PEGGY.

He is very good at pretending He Saw Nothing.]

Any luck in this fashion department? I can't imagine you've located any boots you're hoping for.

Nothing for myself, but I can appreciate what I've seen. Especially some of the jewelry.

[She flashes a bright smile when he brings up boots, though.]

I don't imagine they have a lot of use for boots around here, though.

[OH JEWELRY!!!! He's made some you know!!!

He must investigate your personal tastes.]

They would be quite waterlogged, no doubt. And full of ocean sand.

I must say, that is one thing I am not enjoying about the planet. Infinite amounts of sand.

Sand enough to go around. [Said sarcastically, but not with malice. It is what it is.]

You know, all this ocean and no real beaches. That's just not fair.

But I guess we've had enough of those already.

[FROOOOWN]

Not enough for me.

Whether it be New York or California, there were always a surplus of beaches.

All this water, and I could really do with some actual sunlight.

Next time we're on a world that has solid ground and a sun, I'll drag you out for a stroll.

I will eagerly await this stroll.

I may not be much in the way of warriors, but I am highly skilled at going on walks.

I'll hold you to that. Imagine by the time we get there, everyone will be ready for a stretch.