driftfleet | Network Post

Who: Jack Sparrow and ANYONE
Broadcast: Fleetwide - Unfiltered
Action: Cargo Bay of the Bishop
When: Soon after appearing on the ship in a shower of brilliant confetti and chocolate

[The pirate's got the general idea of things after the rather sterile initiation aboard the Marsiva with all of the Metal Men serving him plates of mushy foodstuffs. All told, it hadn't been unlike the time he'd disguised himself as a eunuch to infiltrate the Moroccan sultan's choicest harem, but ended up assigned to polish the sultan's prized marble gazing ball collection instead. You were low eunuch on the totem, you didn't guard virgins; you rubbed balls day and night until they gleamed like a thousand dying suns.

But you can't let that get you down. You find a way to profit.

Which brings us back to the Metal Men aboard the Marsiva. Jack's first taste of futuristic robotics, they were rather like eunuchs, but were hard and shiny, like marble gazing balls. There were no virgins anywhere to behold. That was where all the similarities between the Marsiva and the sultan's palace stopped.]

Just like rubbing the sultan's damnable balls again. [Alert listeners will hear him mutter that whilst musing over his adventures and trying to figure out use of the coms.

[The Bishop, though, had possibilities. Its cargo hold was empty save for a bicycle that didn't move and moving pathway to nowhere, but it had plenty of smuggling potential. Maybe, too, a place to hide the rum.

Later, louder, with video:] Captain Jack Sparrow, here, aboard the bloody metal box, Bishop.

[He doesn't care that Cersei is the "official" captain.]

I've got a keg of ale and a lovely bottle of rum [no he doesn't] to give to the gentleman -- or lady -- [no, he won't] what knows the prime trade routes in this quadrant of the universe. Savvy?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I wouldn't understand, eh?

Then I shall have to guess.

[Spies were INVENTED in his time, woman! Daniel Defoe himself! Meanwhile, ignoring the part about being here so long that back home doesn't matter.]

I'll start with the A's, shall I?

Alehouse porridge fastener?