driftfleet | Stick a Fork in Me

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Stick a Fork in Me

Who: Katie McCoy and you
Broadcast: Fleetwide.
Action: Vanquish, Iskaulit, Malum
When: Today!

[Video]

Just a moment--

[She'd apologise for the deafening thunk of a very solid piece of metal striking the floor in front of your screens, but she's in too bad a mood. It's the business end of a battle axe, runes inscribed along the metal edge and the weapon far too ridiculously big for a person like Katie to use. In fact, it's not temper that made her slam the stupid thing into the floor. She just can't lift it for very long, it's too goddamned heavy.

(Especially for someone who's been out cold for nearly three months, and this is what she comes back to?)]

Now. Who's responsible for this? Where did you get it?

[Anyone who saw any Tully-related flashbacks in calibrations will recognise the weapon for his. Otherwise, the runework is distinctly Scandinavian (Younger Futhark, to be precise) if there are any geeks in the audience.

...also, that's from the Atroma and it's been sitting in the cargo bay for months. Merry belated Christmas? She really appreciates it. Honest.]

---------

[In person, one can find Katie either dragging said stupid axe back to her quarters on the Vanquish, down at the fox park on the Iskaulit, or lurking at a table in Malum and getting really drunk, which is possibly not wise but par for the course.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

How appropriate. I'll make sure to welcome him if he does show up.

[She'll be extra special and super sweet. She won't even draw blood. At first.]

Just like I hope you'll help me welcome any of my friends.

[Tully's had centuries of having to deal with Katie as a precocious brat. He'll manage.]

Are you sure? A pooka's welcome is often a very interesting thing. [The most innocent of looks.]

[Eh, but Edna has the added benefit of three humans, three other seraph and a hellion as her welcome committee. Tully will have his hands full.

But it would be fun. For her.]

You've met my idiots. I could take less stupid. Besides, new faces around here are always welcome. They always ask the same questions.

One wonders why nobody has played bingo based on their questions, honestly.

[...now there's a thought. A mean one.]

What makes you think someone hasn't?

[Edna frowns, curious.]

Bingo is some sort of checklist, right?

If they have, they've been very quiet about it and I'm very disappointed in them.

[Grin.]

You could say that. It's a little harder to explain, all things considered.

What's stopping us from making one then? If they aren't sharing, why shouldn't we strike out on our own?

[Yes, she's serious. Somewhat.]

[Her eyes light up.]

How terrible of us. What sort of things should we put on it?

[Edna is also strangely into this. It's cathartic.]

"Why am I here?" "Who's in charge?" "What's a space ship?" "When can I go home?" "Where's my mommy?"

"Why aren't you fighting?" "Where can I complain?" "What's an augment?" "Where are my things?"

[This is fun.]

"Where's the real food?" "Why do we have to pitch in?" "What's with all the aliens?" "Why are there so many different versions of Earth represented?" "How do people get picked to come to this show?"

[She's heard these all. It feels good.]

[She's laughing now. Congrats, you've successfully cheered a pissy pooka off.]

Hold on, hold on. I feel I should write some of these down.

[She's got nothin on her but chalk, that sucks. But that doesn't mean she's not gonna vandalise the nearest wall in the name of remembering all these.]

[You're welcome. It's always a good day when Edna can make her friends laugh and make fun of idiots.]

How many do we have to have in total to make up this bingo?

[Lucky for Katie, Edna's parasol actually has a built in pocket with some odds and ends tucked away. Fragments of paper and a crayon are tossed at the pooka. Edna's like a freaking Boy Scout, only cute.]

Enough to fill a square minus one.

[Well, she can't be exact. But now Edna has produced paper and crayon she can draw up a grid and just show it her, middle square already filled in FREE SPACE. Twenty four empty squares all up.]

[Edna looks over Katie's shoulder while she draws up the square, curious as to what it will look like.]

So, there is a space that is just for free. And we need to have what? A full line somehow?

[She might not have Bingo yet, but it's a simple concept.]

We have nine. Maybe mention of ratings? They always whine about that too.

All right, hold on. [She's gonna fill in what they do have so far.]

Ratings, though! That's a good one!

It took me a while to get used to the idea of ratings. Like, who really cares what we're doing day-to-day on space ships? Losers at home, that's who.

[She looks over the card. There are really a lot of blank squares.]

We already had one asking about food... What about all the stuff on the Iskaulit. Like this place or my mountain. Or the ghosts on the Fleet.

They probably won't get asked on a first meeting. Though there's no reason we can't play specialty bingo too. Hmm.

[Thinking.] It doesn't have to be questions. What about when they threaten us with violence or tell us we're no help? That happens a lot.

Those who threaten us are idiots. It's so pointless, but I guess that it does happen a lot.

So are the people who think the entire idea of being here is either funny or dumb. What's funny about this place?

Some people have twisted senses of humour. Or some people just grew up in a place where different things are funny. Or some people use humour as a coping mechanism. Or all of the above.

[Sagely. But then--]

Or some people are just complete morons.

I think it's more the last than all the others. Even the smart ones are stupid.

[Her parasol twirls, a sure sign that she's thinking about something.]

Is this the sort of game that's more fun with other people or can it just be the two of us?

How many do you want playing?

Well, it's a game, so more people playing makes it fun. Do you know anyone who would join and not be a goody-goody?

[That's why she's not asking Mikleo, Alisha, Sorey or Eleanor to play with them.]

[Crowley comes to mind. Not sure about others; she suspects Sam would lineface at her in that crinkly-brow way of his.]

We could leave a small pile of bingo cards anonymously in Malum. That seems to be home of the more easygoing.

[Edna taps a single finger against her lips in thought.]

Sounds like a plan. I guess we'll have to consider rewards for those that win. Since it's a game.

This is work.

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