001;

[privateeyed]

Who: Ben and you folks
Broadcast: Yes
Action: SS Huntress
When: now

action; SS Huntress

[Ben doesn't take teleportation well. In fact, if the confetti and the music didn't tip the ship off, the loud cursing probably does - there you go, Huntress, your security officer is here]

What the fuck—give a guy some fuckin' warning next time, geez! God damn teleporting bullshit.

[once he's calmed down, though - and picked up some of the pudding because far be it from him to turn down free food - he's wandering the ship, peeking his head into rooms to see what's what]


broadcast;

[once he's somewhat settled in and found a place to sit and digest everything going on, Ben decides to set up a broadcast to get some Shit Done]

Anyone here good with cybernetics? Or - I don't know, computers? Advanced stuff, can give you the specfics if you're interested. Don't need you right now, I'm just covering my ass just in case.

[he pauses, and maybe realizes he should . . . introduce himself. Like a normal person would. You know, instead of just getting down to business]

Uh - anyway, name's Ben; if you don't know shit about cybernetics . . . I don't know, come tell me about the weird crap going on here. Or stuff I should know. I like being informed.

Comments

[passingthrough]

It's happened at least three times for some people. And it almost happened once back at home for me. But it's your first I take it.

Which ship did they put you on?

[privateeyed]

Three? That's some shitty luck. Yeah, uh - this is the first time.

I'm on the Huntress.

[passingthrough]

It is. Or good luck if you get an upgrade out of it. There are worse places to be. Not that you ever want to be somewhere without any control over you life, but hey...

The Huntress. That's... That's a ship I don't actually know much about. [She knows a few of people on that crew, but none of them that well and most of them are more recent to the fleet.] So, no help there.

[privateeyed]

No control, but a free upgrade? Wow, that's tempting. [it comes out deadpanned, it isn't tempting at all]

There's something we've got in common. How many ships are there?

[passingthrough]

Life in a cage version 2.0. [She smiles like it's a joke, but also...this is prison too just without the bars and walls. Not that her actual prison had bars or walls. Just a big dome in an otherwise pleasant setting.]

Seventeen if you count the Marsiva and the Iskaulit and don't count the shuttles. I'm captain of the Twin Roses. I didn't name it.

[privateeyed]

Sounds like it'd be some old rock band name. [a thoughtful pause] Or a metal song name. Can't decide which is better.

[seventeen. That's a lot of people] Could be worse - could be named after dead general no one knows shit about outside of history class.

[passingthrough]

I'm seeing a hair band with it for sure. And I can almost picture the logo and since they have a logo it should probably be the band's name. [It just follows a logical track you see.]

Or General Twin of the Rose family. He probably had a crazy mustache.

[privateeyed]

Hair band? [give him a minute] Like those bands from way back in the 1980s? [.......] Yeah, I can see it.

Bet he liked to wear red, too.

[passingthrough]

Oh, for sure. Bandanas tied around random parts of himself. Fringe. Leather. Random metal spikes. Just a lot of really mixed fashion messages.

[But she heard that pause.]

So, kind of a future guy? [Not that she's from the 80s, but she wouldn't act like they were a distant memory either. AND DON'T ASK WHEN SHE'S FROM! I CAN FEEL YOU THINKING ABOUT IT! ALL OF YOU! EVERYONE READING THIS!]

[privateeyed]

Probably fit the times. I don't know, that's a bit out of my wheelhouse. [he likes vintage stuff but even his knowledge only goes so far]

Uh - it's 2123 where I'm from, so. Maybe? [BUT IT'S SO TEMPTING NOW KITTY, THE NATURAL PROGRESSION OF CONVERSATION CALLS FOR IT]

[passingthrough]

[It might just fits her occasionally mistmatched sense of style.

IT'S TRUE, BUT SHE WILL FIGHT IT! SHE WILL BURY IT IN ALL THIS OTHER CONFUSING INFORMATION!]

That counts. At least to the median timeline of fleet residents.

People are brought here from [counting on fingers for greater effect] any planet, any reality from the multiverse, and any timeline. Mix, match, and repeat until you get a rag tag gang of misfits to fill your reality show. Hilarity and drama ensue.

[privateeyed]

[listen he can't talk, he wears a leather jacket almost religiously. He enjoys older styles more than the new hotness or whatever it is people wear in his time]

The - medium timeline. [she elaborates, answering his next question] See that just sounds like a shitty made-for-TV Disney movie. If only this place would get that same rating.

[passingthrough]

Depending on how much they show I'd say we're R to NC-17. [Does that make it better?]

[privateeyed]

I don't think I've seen a single movie higher than an R. What, they watching people have sex and shit?

[passingthrough]

No idea where the cameras are, so it's hard to say if they are always or ever actually filming or not. If they can then they probably are? It's not like they're interested in our consent.

[privateeyed]

That's breaking so many laws. [christ almighty] Yeah, yeah, space, I know.

[he glances over his shoulder, as if there may be a camera in the corner - then he flips it off and yells] I'm taking a vow of celibacy, you voyeuristic fuckheads! Enjoy that.

[passingthrough]

Yeah, I think after the multidimensional kidnapping they gave up worrying about laws.

[Kitty looks amused at the outburst.] You're probably only hurting yourself, but good luck with that.

[privateeyed]

I'm offended, deeply. [deadpan] I'm legally required to be.

[he scoffs and settles back] Not hurting a thing.

[passingthrough]

People are very law abiding and pure in the future.

[privateeyed]

If only. [he snorts] It sure as hell would make my job easier.

[passingthrough]

Curiosity achieved. What's your job, Ben from the future?

[privateeyed]

Ben from the future sounds like one hell of a boring movie.

[as he answers, though, his right eye suddenly darkens - like the light behind it went out. He casually reaches up to hit himself in the head to get it working again]

I'm a certified private investigator - CPI. I do the PI thing, but I'm also like a freelancing cop. I'll take cases from the cops that won't get the time it deserves and work them myself.

I used to be a cop, but the CPI thing is a lot less a pain in the ass.

[passingthrough]

It definitely doesn't have an R or above rating. [She smiles and then listens to him talking about his job.]

Former cop, huh? I used to date a fed. Actually...I guess I used to date two feds. [She'd never thought of Winn that way before and maybe it wasn't fully accurate, but he did work for a secret federal government agency as an agent.]

[privateeyed]

You underestimate how much cursing I do. I can get it to an R. [what you've heard so far is mild compared to when he really gets going]

Hey, so did I. That's two things in common.

[passingthrough]

[That would be more fun. Her ratings are usually for dark themes. Okay, sex too.]

Wow, go us. What was the first thing we had?