(no subject)

[sassy_assassin]

Who: Sara
Broadcast: Video!
Action: On the Marsiva // The Twin Roses
When: Now!

[ The feed starts with Sara adjusting the camera and pursing her lips, then flashing a waxy smile that doesn't go anywhere near her eyes ]

Hi, so, I'm going to need you to go ahead and let me out of here and return me to my ship. I mean, we could do this the long way, but you really, really won't like that. It will be long. And painful. Possibly over days. The thing I'm going to assume you didn't realize about me before you decided to make this incredibly idiotic move is that I don't take kindly to cages. They're not really my thing, and I have a particular prejudice against the people who want to put me in them.

But hey.

[ She puts her hands up in a conciliatory manner ]

Maybe I'm reading this entire situation the wrong way. Just come and get me, we'll talk, and I won't even break your fingers for it. Promise.

Okay? Okay. Chop chop!

[ She rolls her eyes, sighs, and switches off the camera ]

****

[ some time later, Sara shows up in a burst of confetti on The Twin Roses. Hi friends! ]

Comments

Action

[sassy_assassin]

That's the impression I'm getting, that everyone else is as stuck as I am. Shame, really.

I'm Sara.

Who's the cat?

Action

[goldenglasses]

[Vash smiles kindly as he lowers his hands and finishes that step he was in the middle of.] Oh! This is Kuroneko. She's one of our many pets on board. I hope you're not allergic. I would say I'll try to keep her out of your room, but I'm just going to be honest instead.

She kind of does whatever she wants no matter what I try to do. [As if to prove how pathetic Vash is with her Kuroneko reaches up to sharper her claws on his legs. She wants food!] OW! [Excuse Vash for a moment as he reaches down to carefully remove the cat from his leg.]

Action

[sassy_assassin]

Seems like she and I have a lot in common.

[ she outstretches some fingers to entice the kitty to come over for scritchins ]

Action

[goldenglasses]

[Kuroneko is more than happy to oblige. Coming up with a soft nyerow and brushing her head against those outstretched fingers. She's always happy to shower everyone except Vash with love.]

Aw, that's not fair! She hasn't even fed you once yet! [It's not like he's jealous that this cat he didn't even want likes everyone more than him or anything!]

Action

[sassy_assassin]

[ scritch scritch ]

Hey, game recognizes game.

So, which one are you? The thief, the spy, the mafioso, the samurai, or the pacifist?

Action

[goldenglasses]

[Samurai is Makie. Mafioso is Chuuya. Spy is... Kurt? Kitty? He's pretty sure it's Kurt as Kitty didn't mention being a spy to him before. Thief is likely Remy.] I am happy to say I'm the pacifist. So I take it you've met either Kitty or Kurt.

Action

[sassy_assassin]

Kitty, the ex-assassin. So now you have two of those.

Action

[goldenglasses]

Hey, as long as there's an "ex" in front of that I have no problems with retired assassins. [Just in case there was any worry about his pacifist title.]

Action

[sassy_assassin]

Glad to hear it, then.

Action

[goldenglasses]

So, what do you do now that you're not an assassin?

Action

[sassy_assassin]

I'm a ship captain, actually. I run a timeship and we travel through time to fix things. Sometimes we even manage to do it.

Action

[goldenglasses]

What? Really? Though time itself? Don't you have to worry about changing the future too much or something? I read something like that in a novel once. Or do you always go into the future so that doesn't matter?

Action

[sassy_assassin]

I mean, there are rules.

But some rules are made to be broken.

Re: Action

[goldenglasses]

So a rebel ex-assassin, huh? Yeah, I think you'll fit in around here just fine.

Action

[sassy_assassin]

I'm something of a professional fuck up by now. But we always win out in the end.

Action

[goldenglasses]

Hey now, professional fuck up is my job. I don't want anyone stealing my work away from me. [He says with a a wink and a smile.]

Action

[sassy_assassin]

I suspect I ended up on the right ship.

Action

[goldenglasses]

I'm sure you have! We're a pretty good bunch here. I doubt you'll have any problem fitting in, but you can let me know if anyone gives you any trouble.

And if it's me giving you trouble then, ahhhhhh... please don't tell Kitty?

Action

[sassy_assassin]

You scared of her?

Action

[goldenglasses]

Scared? Of Kitty? Please, she's like a pussy-cat! [He laughs loudly at his own pun.] Please don't tell her I told you that one either.

Action

[sassy_assassin]

Uh-huh. Right.

If you're not scared of her... just remember, you're the one who made the pussy joke.

Re: Action

[goldenglasses]

Well, you're an ex-assassin, right? I'm pretty sure that means you can't tell her or else she'd kill me. There for, you'd assassinate me. And as you are retired you are just not allowed to do that!

[Because that's obviously how logic works.]

Action

[sassy_assassin]

Hey, assassination only refers to killing people I'm directed to kill, not who I feel like killing.

[ she's teasing ]

Action

[goldenglasses]

What!? That's no fair! It should include all people!

[He pouts as if there was some sort of rule he's just been cheating out on.]

Action

[sassy_assassin]

It's not my fault that different words have different definitions.