driftfleet | VIDEO; I want to play a game

Who: the Iron Bull and YOU
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: If you wanna find him in the gym on the Iskaulit, sure!
When: Late Monday night, because when you can't sleep, but it's just because you're thinking of home, you do shitposts in the middle of the night.

[ It's pretty clear from the sheen of sweat across the Bull's considerable shoulders, he's been working out even if it weren't obvious he was in the gym of the Iskaulit at the time. He takes a seat on a bench as the feed turns on and he smiles amicably at the fleet. ]

Hey! So, back home, me and the boys used to play a game when we were on the road. It's not easy to carry around a table around for cards just to have somebody get pissed and knock it over. [ He shakes his head. ] Anyway, here's how you play: you figure out the weirdest, most badass monster you and think of, right, and then you pit it against somebody else's, and you figure out who would win in a fight. Then, the loser has to come up with something that could beat the winner, or somebody else does. Whatever works. Sometimes there's fights.

[ He rolls his shoulders in a shrug. ]

That's the fun part, anyway. Okay, I'll go first: How about...a... [ He looks thoughtful. He's not going for the dragon first off. That's sort of like cheating. ] ...a wyvern, but with wings that let it fly in short bursts sort of like a chicken...and, uh...a gaze that can turn things to stone if its held too long.

[ This is a come at 'em thing! Feel free to post your own, threadjack with rebuttals, arguments, your own "games". Have fun! ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Hate those things, we got stuff like that back home.

Umm I bet a Red Dragon could kick its ass though. Fire breath obviously, but even though they're not that big it takes ten tons of beatings to put the damn thing in the ground.

...did you say red dragons aren't that big? Define "small" then.

Y'know, small. [Holds up hands for approximate scale] Red dragons are about, uhhh...on all fours, maybe as tall as three of me? Four? There's smaller ones, only about as tall as a me and a half.

[ Bull nods. ]

Yeah, that's pretty small for a dragon, but a hell of a lot bigger than a wyvern. And they breath fire, huh?

Yeah most of 'em. ...All of them? All red dragons do, but there's other, uh...dragon-y monsters that don't.

How big'r your dragons?

Shit, depends on the breed, but...around the size of a mid-range battleship?

Shit. I want to fight one of those.

I know, right? Shit, the beat of their wings sends shockwaves through the air, and that roar. I'd kill to roar like that!

Wait okay so, do you wanna bekill a dragon?

Okay, so. We Qunari don't hold much sacred, but dragons? Shit yeah.

[He grins, leaning closer to the video feed.]

There's this legend, see, that sometime, maybe a long time ago, somebody mixed dragon in our blood. It's the horns probably, but killing a dragon's sort of like...a rite of passage, the small anyway. And a High Dragon?

[He makes a grunt of pleasure.]

There's nothing like going face to face with that kind of raw, uncontrolled power and dominating it.

....this is starting to sound kind of sexual.

....

[He clears his throat and....might look a little bashful?]

Yeah, okay. I know it's not everybody's thing.

Uh, yeah, no judgment [SO MUCH JUDGMENT] just- how does that...work...?

Wow you know what? Dumb question. Don't wanna know how it works.

Whoa, hey now! I don't want to fuck a dragon. Fighting them just really does it for me.

I guess that's not too weird. [He gets a rush after fighting though not to the point where he wanna truck n fuck]

[Just means you're not trying hard enough, Cloud.]

Heh, never had a complaint.

I don't even know your name and now I know more about your sex life than I ever wanted to. Great.

It's the Iron Bull, kid. Now you know two things about me.

The Iron Bull?

Yeah. I like the article in the front. Makes it sound like I'm just a mindless weapon, and that really does it for me.

[bruh that is sincerely dope as fuck] Oh, cool. Y'know, tough. Bet it looks good on a business card.

[Yeah, man. He knows. He knows.]

When you're trying to get hired by nobles, yeah. It's pretty smart to keep it simple, that way they get it. When they hire me and the boy, they hire the Bull and his Chargers. See? Simple.

[taking notes tbh] Do you always gotta have a group? Didn't you ever go it solo?

We always get hired as a group, but we've all got different things we're good at. Take Skinner. She's really good at sticking knifes in things before they do the same to her. Dalish is our mage...but she says she's an archer to keep the Templars off our backs. Stitches is our healer, and he's pretty damned good at it. Rocky's pretty good at blowing shit up and Grim? Grim's terrifying to face one on one. Krem's my second-in-command. He's pretty good at scoping out a battlefield and putting people where they need to be. And me? I'm really good at hitting things.

[Can you tell how much he loves those guys?]

video

moseyin - 2018-09-24 04:27 (UTC) - Expand

theirondragon - 2018-09-25 22:31 (UTC) - Expand