VIDEO; I want to play a game

[theirondragon]

Who: the Iron Bull and YOU
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: If you wanna find him in the gym on the Iskaulit, sure!
When: Late Monday night, because when you can't sleep, but it's just because you're thinking of home, you do shitposts in the middle of the night.

[ It's pretty clear from the sheen of sweat across the Bull's considerable shoulders, he's been working out even if it weren't obvious he was in the gym of the Iskaulit at the time. He takes a seat on a bench as the feed turns on and he smiles amicably at the fleet. ]

Hey! So, back home, me and the boys used to play a game when we were on the road. It's not easy to carry around a table around for cards just to have somebody get pissed and knock it over. [ He shakes his head. ] Anyway, here's how you play: you figure out the weirdest, most badass monster you and think of, right, and then you pit it against somebody else's, and you figure out who would win in a fight. Then, the loser has to come up with something that could beat the winner, or somebody else does. Whatever works. Sometimes there's fights.

[ He rolls his shoulders in a shrug. ]

That's the fun part, anyway. Okay, I'll go first: How about...a... [ He looks thoughtful. He's not going for the dragon first off. That's sort of like cheating. ] ...a wyvern, but with wings that let it fly in short bursts sort of like a chicken...and, uh...a gaze that can turn things to stone if its held too long.

[ This is a come at 'em thing! Feel free to post your own, threadjack with rebuttals, arguments, your own "games". Have fun! ]

Comments

[tough_love]

Oh I'd hardly call it a fight. Even if your creature did somehow win, any battling would no doubt be over in seconds.

We call them sand rippers because they attack from underground. They swim beneath the surface and ambush anything that moves. Usually in packs, but well, that would just be unfair.

So- how does your, er...[the heck was it called again? no matter]...creature combat something that ambushes you from beneath your feet?

[theirondragon]

It's a wyvern, and it can fly a little bit.

[ Okay, not much at all. ]

Fine...okay, what about a giant with a really big club that can sense motion beneath the sand?

[tough_love]

I should mention they will breach to attack low-flying shuttlecraft as well.

[Seriously, this is why most of her people get around on those big zibosons. Something alive and big and durable that's just not worth the effort.]

I would say it depends on just how big this giant is.

[Because come on Bull, just. Look in the mirror. The two of them are already considerably bigger than anyone else in the Fleet.]


If it were large enough, not even its reflexes would be important. But if it is too small...

[theirondragon]

Hey, it's big enough I'm calling it a giant. Most of 'em are two, three stories tall easy, ground shakes when they walk. They're slow, but who cares if you only have to hit something once?

[tough_love]

Hm. In that case, I suppose it is likely the giant would win, even if it is unlikely to emerge unscathed.

[But hey, what better way to fight a giant than with another giant?]

But it would not have any chance of success against a feral To'kustar- one that somehow retains enough intelligence to at least properly strategize. I have been told that typically To'kustars are sentient beings, but I have encountered some that were... wrong. Very, very wrong.

[And that wasn't Looma just deploying some hyperbole for dramatic effect, either. The longer she thought about them, the more visibly uncomfortable she became- she was still enjoying the game, sure, but it would be hard to tell just from looking at her. Smile waning, arms drawn in close, she'd even dug a finger into the freshly re-healed wound on her left forearm just to take her mind off it. She does not like being helpless, and despite being trapped here, it's obvious that wherever she'd run into these creatures, it was a very different situation.]

[theirondragon]

[And you mean "what more badass way, right? Because that fight would be ridiculously badass.]

Okay, this sound pretty awesome, too. What what'a To'kustar?

[tough_love]

Another race from my home galaxy. Or possibly from somewhere outside it- it is just known that it is possible to stumble across one somewhere in it. If they have a homeworld, none have managed to discover it. Everything I have heard suggests they are nomadic in nature, and tend to wander the furthest reaches of the galaxy. I have yet to encounter a normal one, and what little I know of them is barely better than rumor.

[Which isn't to say it's inherently untrue. She just wasn't prepared to put much faith in the details until she'd seen them crop up again and again in different stories, such as their solitary nature and where they might be found. But she could definitely confirm their size.]

But I have seen feral ones. And if what you say is true, then I would expect your largest giant to be capable of reaching one's knee.

It would have to leap to do so, of course.

[theirondragon]

...no shit...that's badass.

[He grins.]

You know, Looma. One day, I'm gonna figure out how to get to your universe.