VIDEO; I want to play a game

[theirondragon]

Who: the Iron Bull and YOU
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: If you wanna find him in the gym on the Iskaulit, sure!
When: Late Monday night, because when you can't sleep, but it's just because you're thinking of home, you do shitposts in the middle of the night.

[ It's pretty clear from the sheen of sweat across the Bull's considerable shoulders, he's been working out even if it weren't obvious he was in the gym of the Iskaulit at the time. He takes a seat on a bench as the feed turns on and he smiles amicably at the fleet. ]

Hey! So, back home, me and the boys used to play a game when we were on the road. It's not easy to carry around a table around for cards just to have somebody get pissed and knock it over. [ He shakes his head. ] Anyway, here's how you play: you figure out the weirdest, most badass monster you and think of, right, and then you pit it against somebody else's, and you figure out who would win in a fight. Then, the loser has to come up with something that could beat the winner, or somebody else does. Whatever works. Sometimes there's fights.

[ He rolls his shoulders in a shrug. ]

That's the fun part, anyway. Okay, I'll go first: How about...a... [ He looks thoughtful. He's not going for the dragon first off. That's sort of like cheating. ] ...a wyvern, but with wings that let it fly in short bursts sort of like a chicken...and, uh...a gaze that can turn things to stone if its held too long.

[ This is a come at 'em thing! Feel free to post your own, threadjack with rebuttals, arguments, your own "games". Have fun! ]

Comments

[theirondragon]

Trust me, I know. Look, things went so sideways back home, that they had to enact an ancient organization that overrides everybody else just to sort everything else.

[He pauses.]

Not that I'm complaining. The Inquisition pays me and the boys pretty well. War's always lucrative for mercenaries.

[dothelokimotion]

I hear that's rather common on many worlds.

[theirondragon]

What, human's coming up with their own cleanup crew? [he chuckles.] Can't say I'm surprised.

And yet, I've had a lot of folks here ask me, "Hey, what's a Qunari?" But I've never heard "what's a human". They're everywhere.

[dothelokimotion]

Indeed. It's rather frustrating to explain one's self over and over again. And yet, it rarely takes.

[theirondragon]

Nah, It's probably that there's so many of 'em, they just assume you're human until you tell 'em otherwise. Me? It's harder to hide.

[dothelokimotion]

[ the iron bull doesn't look that unusual to loki, but he's traveled most of the known universe. ]

That must get frustrating in its own right.

[theirondragon]

Sometimes. They treat me like a dumb ox-man. Sometimes that really works for me, you know?

[dothelokimotion]

[ A nod. ]

Turning their expectations against them. I do that frequently.

[theirondragon]

Eh, maybe not against them, but when you're a spy and you look like this, and you're surrounded by a bunch of humans, it works better if they think you're dumb, yeah.

[dothelokimotion]

Are you a spy?

[theirondragon]

[He smiles.]

Not anymore.

[dothelokimotion]

What changed?

[theirondragon]

[He doesn't say anything for a moment.]

You want the short version or the long version?

[dothelokimotion]

[ He shrugs. ]

I have time to spare.

[theirondragon]

About 10 years ago, the Qun sent me south as a spy undercover as a Tal-Vashoth mercenary. Tal-Vashoth means "Grey One", basically it's what they label everyone who's turned their backs on the Qun, only it was a ruse. While undercover, I put together my own band. Fast forward, the Qun offers an alliance to my current employer, but needs a hand protecting an important ship from some mutual enemies, first. My guys are pretty good as shock troops, sure, but they were pinned down and facing enemy reinforcements. Ordering them to fall back would sacrifice the ship and ruin any potential alliance the Qun was offering.

[He looks somber, but resolute.]

I saved my guys.

[dothelokimotion]

That would be considered admirable.

[ And of course, detrimental to the cause. Setting progress back a great deal too. ]