action and video.

[rebuildyourruins]

Who: Thor + you
Broadcast: yes, video
Action: First Breath and Blue Fish
When: January 3rd - 4th

closed to Natasha.

[It takes some time for Thor to calm down enough from the shock of his memories to even think about what to do next. He had effectively chosen one thing of importance - Loki - and firmly shoved everything else to the side for hours. To take stock of the rest of it, look his own glaring mistakes in the face, was too much for him at the outset. But Thor isn't selfish at heart. There's only so long he can take focusing on himself before his mind turns to others.

He has to review what he knows from those last shattering moments on Earth with a grim objectivity before he gets in touch with the others. Once he does, it's easy enough to put together some of the pieces from his conversations with Natasha and know she's the one to call.

Not call exactly, but text.]

Can you meet me in the Space Bar?

[He briefly considers saying something else, bracing her for what he wants. There's no way he can think of to put that into text, though, so he doesn't. Once it's sent, he heads over to the Iskaulit to wait.]

action - first breath.

[Thor hadn't exactly been subtle when he came hurtling through the First Breath the night before, running straight through the ship in full battle armor before shutting himself in Loki's room. And that's where he stayed for a long time.

He does eventually come out though, rubbing tiredly at his face and heading into the kitchen. Thor's been here enough times to know where everything is. After a few moments of staring blankly at the countertops and cupboards, unreality threatening to unmoor him, he shakes himself and smacks the coffee pot onto the stove.

He'll be there for a while, drinking coffee at the bench and gazing vaguely at some fixed point on the wall. Still in full cape and mail sleeves. The bone-deep exhaustion in his face might have something to do with it.]

action - blue fish.

[Thor returns to his own ship during the day, knowing abstractly that the Fleet is due to depart this world soon. In the past he would prepare for this, restocking the food supplies and ensuring everything in the armory was locked back into place and accounted for. That was when the ship had more crew, and he hadn't yet become captain. Still, it needed to be done. Regardless of how unworthy he feels when he enters his own bedroom and sees the captain's bed in there.

Thor can be found stacking up crates in the cargo bay, checking through the fridges and freezers, and doing systems checks. Later on, he opts to sit on the top of the ship, watching the snow fall in silence.]

video.

[It's not the sudden reappearance of the short, jagged hair Thor used to sport or the incongruous brown eye where his eyepatch usually is that most dominates Thor's face when the video switches on. It's the weariness etched in hard lines all over him. There's no mistaking it, regardless of his otherwise composed demeanour. He merely nods at the camera before he starts, gruffer than usual.]

For those who knew her, Riona Cousland Theirin has left the Fleet. She was here for over three years, so I know she will be missed by many of us.

[There's a pause as though he might say more, but decides against it.]

The captaincy of the Blue Fish has fallen to me in her place. If you have any questions about that, you can bring them to me. [Thor shuts his eyes briefly, shaking his head.] Or... anything else.

[No doubt there might be some. He switches off the feed.]

Comments

[rebuildyourruins]

[It's a compulsion Thor doesn't care to examine much. Like a gravitational pull he always ends up back on the First Breath by evening time, and then he ends up staying there overnight. There's a nameless fear in him about what might happen if he goes too long without seeing Loki in person. Even though they don't talk that much, it's a comfort just being nearby.

It beats rattling around his own ship endlessly looking for things to do. There's not that much that needs fixing or rearranging - Thor had already been taking care of things too well for that. But then Steve had arrived and there was something else to take care of.

He had come back to the ship not long ago, going into the kitchen and taking a seat. That was as far as he'd gotten before he just chewed over his own thoughts, gaze fixed on the walls. Loki's interjection stirs him out of that reverie.]

Uh, sure. All right. [...] You know how to make coffee?

[He can't honestly remember if Loki even knows what it is, beyond Thor telling him to try it.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki rolls his eyes at that, traces of the old humour at the corners. ]

This is my ship, Thor. I know how things work here.

[rebuildyourruins]

[He grunts, not surprised but it's a point of interest all the same. Getting up from his seat he moves around to fetch a mug and get the coffee.]

Right down to the drink dispensers.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki shrugs. the ship is his now and like all things loki owns, he needs to know about it from the inside out. he refuses to leave any detail unattended. ]

Don't make a fuss when someone offers you coffee.

[rebuildyourruins]

I'm not.

[Unless a single comment counts as a fuss. He takes the coffee pot and fills his mug, mind elsewhere. After a few drawn out moments he looks over at Loki again.]

How's your neck?

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki instinctively reaches to touch his neck, before dropping his hand mid-way. ]

Healing. The bruises should be gone soon.

[rebuildyourruins]

[It seems true enough. The bruises have turned that mottled yellow colour that comes with healing, and Loki no longer rasps terribly when he speaks. Thor lets out a breath, nodding, before taking a mouthful of his coffee.]

Good.

[It's a reminder neither of them want.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ is it though? loki can feel the silence hang between them. it's a far cry from what they were before. things loki has inevitably ruined. but he can't feel bad, he refuses to. he just had to hold onto the fact that his death had some meaning. he did the right thing, even if it came at the very end. it was the right thing. the right —

loki cuts it off at the knees. ]

And you?

[rebuildyourruins]

[Thor gives Loki a strange look, not sure what he's asking.]

I didn't get any lasting injuries. None that weren't healed before I even came back here.

[dothelokimotion]

[ quiet, carefully. ]

You have not said much since then.

[rebuildyourruins]

[Hasn't he? Not to Loki, he supposes. Plenty of other people have come around to talk to him. Thor has said and not said a lot of things to them. But there's more explaining to do when it comes to others.]

I've been thinking.

[True. He has. He sighs, rubbing at his eye.]

And it's stupid to say this, but it's weird having two eyes again.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki blinks. ]

I imagine it is an improvement though.

[rebuildyourruins]

It is, and it didn't bother me at home. Here, though, I spent a year getting used to having one.

[And now he finds it jarring to have depth perception again, having gone so long without it in the Fleet.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki sniffs. ]

I could have stolen an eye for you ages ago.

[rebuildyourruins]

Yeah, but I didn't need one. I talked to you about that.

[It was a while ago he knows, but he does remember bringing it up in conversation at least once. As priorities went it was never Thor's highest.]

I only have this one because someone gave it to me.

[dothelokimotion]

[ thor had. loki didn't care much for his reasoning though. ]

Not Stark, I presume. All his technology seems to break down or go evil eventually.

[rebuildyourruins]

No. Not Stark. [He sets the coffee mug down, growing sombre once again.] No one knows where Stark is at the moment.

I got it from one of the crew of the ship who found me in space.

[dothelokimotion]

[ oh no,,,, if only someone cared,,,,, ]

What crew?

[rebuildyourruins]

A group of six. They were... following our distress call. They just arrived too late.

[Not that one small ship with a gaggle of six people could have done anything to save them. Even if one had been a daughter of Thanos herself. Thor knows there had been no one left to rescue by the time they picked him up. That wouldn't have changed if they had arrived any earlier. They could have been destroyed themselves.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki's expression twists. he had put out that distress call. and it had come too late. his hands tremble around the cup. ]

That seems to be the theme.

[rebuildyourruins]

[It does. Thor nods once, staring into his own mug on the counter. After a moment he speaks again.]

There wouldn't have been much they could do. Thanos destroyed the ship not long after you died.

[dothelokimotion]

[ thanos always had a way of rendering loki meaningless. ]

They saved you.

[rebuildyourruins]

They did.

[Thor might have survived the blast and the drift in space, but he wouldn't have lasted that way forever. He knows that.]

And they wouldn't have come at all without that message.

[dothelokimotion]

[ and that does soften the blow enough for loki to look at thor. ]

Good. That's all I wanted.

[rebuildyourruins]

Yeah. I know.

[Loki had made that clear, though it still sits terribly inside of Thor, like a rock in his gut. There's only so much death he can swallow, it seems.

He picks up his coffee again and has another sip, cutting his eyes over at Loki.]