( how the dinosaurs died )

[dothelokimotion]

Who: Loki + You
Broadcast: Video
Action: Planetside
When: Right here, right now

[ the feed turns on, though it seems to start with a burst of static and a blurry screen before it finally seems to straighten itself out. though the scene you might be seeing seems a little . . . hard to take in. mostly because it looks like everything has been frozen. plants, grass and giant dinosaurs like T-Rexs that were in mid-lunge to bite on . . . a huddled lump who has a quilt over their head and cocooned deep within the covers. And also happens to be sneezing a lot. ]

This — [ loki sneezes, looking pale, harried and a little . . . blue. ] — Is the worst. Why is everything so — [ another loud sneeze. ] — uncomfortable?! And how do you make it stop?!

Comments

[sinistral]

I’m glad.

[Though it probably means he should let go of Loki’s hand. He does, though not without a brief squeeze.]

It’s got to be something in the air, something that the shuttle’s systems can flush out.

[dothelokimotion]

[ ah. loki feels a brief pang of loss at that. ]

Most likely. I never knew anything that could do that to me.

I never felt that sort of . . . loss of control.

[sinistral]

[Loss of control, being a literal prisoner in his own body and mind, is something he knows all too well. He forcibly suppresses the shiver that wants to work its way down his spine.]

It’s not fun. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

[dothelokimotion]

No. I imagine you know what it's like.

[ loki has felt it before, long ago. this was nothing, of course, just a slight loss in his usual control but it was uncomfortable all the same. ]

[sinistral]

Intimately, [he says, and can’t stop the shiver this time.] And I know I can be brought right back to that without warning.

[dothelokimotion]

[ he frowns, before he replies, tentative and careful. ]

Can it be . . . blocked?

[sinistral]

No. [He looks down at his left hand, curling the fingers into a fist, uncurling them slowly. Metal plates shift smoothly with the movements.]

They were very thorough in creating me.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki pauses once more, then replies, gentle. ]

Maybe so. But you stand here, proof of the cracks in the mold.

. . . I could help. I have some ability with the mind.

[sinistral]

It's part of why they keep me in storage when they don't need me. [He shrugs.] I haven't been wiped in a while.

[Which is really just talking to distract while he tries to consider that offer, what it means and what it could potentially mean.]

No. I don't know. I need to think about it. [Then, quickly, as if he has to get the words out before they die in his throat:] It's not that the offer isn't generous; it is, more so than I deserve. But I need time. I need to think.

[dothelokimotion]

[ his lips twitch slightly. ]

I wasn't expecting you to accede to it immediately. After all, it is an offer that needs consideration.

[ he doesn't expect bucky to jump right in or want it. after all, it is the mind they're discussing here and people would want to protect it at all costs. ]

No offense was heard.

[sinistral]

Mmm...

[Consideration is putting it politely he thinks, though he doesn't say it. That would be cruel, and Loki seems only to want to help. The mind is a difficult thing, and his situation somewhat unique.]

You're kinder about it than most. I do thank you for that.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki reaches out to touch the metal knuckles of bucky's hand. ]

You can say no as well.

[ the offer isn't a noose or an end to a . . . relationship. loki understand the delicacies of the mind. ]

[sinistral]

[That hand turns at Loki's touch, fingertips brushing his palm again. Like before the only sensory feedback he gets is that of pressure.

But Loki is warm. He hopes Loki will always be warm to him.]

Thank you. Truly.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki smiles once more, gently tugging bucky's hand to rest it against his cheek. ]

You're welcome.

[sinistral]

[He doesn't know why Loki does it, but he does shift the half-step closer so his arm isn't extended awkwardly.]

I suppose I did promise myself into your hands, didn't I?

[dothelokimotion]

[ his hands were never meant to hold much. loki has never known how to hold onto something, how to keep it safe. everything he has touched, he has inevitably ruined in some form. the cool metal on his cheek slowly warms. ]

I am in yours as well.

[sinistral]

Copycat.

[But there's something almost playful in it, and he's watching Loki carefully, watching his hand against pale skin. He has a feeling that Loki's waiting for something, or perhaps he is, but he's no idea what that something could be.]

But see? I told you that your touch couldn't harm me.

[dothelokimotion]

[ carefully. ]

You don't mind my taking liberties with you?

[sinistral]

You haven’t taken anything I haven’t been willing to give.

If you overstep, I will tell you.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki nods slowly at that, tilting his head into bucky's palm. ]

[sinistral]

[He’s still, palm curved carefully to Loki’s cheek, eyes on his. There’s something almost vulnerable about the moment, but it’s not as uncomfortable as he would have imagined.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki smiles faintly, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he pulls away. ]

We should head back.

[sinistral]

You're right of course.

[His hand drops and he takes a step back as well, giving Loki space once more. Still, it hadn't been uncomfortable to allow the other man so close, and that's something new.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki smirks. ]

Aren't I always?

[sinistral]

[Oh is that how they're going to play it?]

I can think of one time you were wrong.