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video ♪ well fuck this

Who: Varric
Broadcast: Open a/v on the network.
Action: Anyone on the Marsiva, since he hasn't been shuffled yet.
When: Dec 29th, or so.

[video;]

[The feed, quite frankly, is crap. The communicator's been bumped on midsentence and appears to be capturing video of an empty bunk.]

—e's ass! Where is Bianca?

[There is some mad shuffling offscreen. A door opens, then closes. The shuffling returns, and this time, there is... chest hair? Chest hair. Sorry. He picks up the communicator, examing it and turning it in his hands, and then finally looking straight into the camera.]

I may be the most desirable dwarf in all of Kirkwall, but that doesn't give anyone free pass to kidnap me twice in a row. Come out of hiding, hand over the crossbow, and maybe I'll feel generous enough not to shoot someone in the face on the way out. Maybe.

[His brows knit together. He leans back and rubs at his temple.]

Maker's breath... my head feels like it's full of cotton. Cotton and shit I've never seen before.

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I hate to break it to you, kid, but all the hair you should've gotten on your chest grew on your head instead.

[He has a bad feeling he's gonna end up babysitting.]

It did not! I-it's just taking a bit, that's all!

[ HIS MANLINESS...

~~sora you lost all manliness when half the players thought you were a chick~~ ]

You're, what, twelve? [He makes a tsking noise.] Your time's running out. I heard humans stop growing at sixteen.

Better start lifting.

I'm fifteen!!

Even less time than I thought.

[He heaves a great sigh, puts on a mournful expression.]

I'm afraid there's no cure for being short and cute. But... listen. [He leans in, dropping his voice to a stage whisper.] If you like wearing dresses, I could probably hook you up with like-minded people. You could make a serious career out of it.

I know a guy who knows a guy who designs dresses for the Orlesian court, and he pays royally. His last two models quit because they didn't like having live birds in their hair, or something. It's an Orlesian thing.

Edited 2014-12-30 18:45 (UTC)

I don't wear dresses! I'm not a girl! That's weird! I'm a hero!

You're a hero? Did you just decide that one day because you managed to smack someone with a stick, or do you have any heroic deeds to go with that?

[He rests his chin in his hand.]

Don't lie to me, kid. I'll tell your parents to come pick you up, and that's no fun for anyone.

I've saved the worlds a couple'a times already, and won a bunch of tournaments at Coliseum and Underdrome!

[He sounds so proud of himself, it's cute.]

You realize that fights get thrown all the time, right? That's not what makes a hero. If you want people to believe you, you're going to need some good stories. You can't just tell people the ending without talking about how you got there.

What's your name?

Edited 2014-12-31 01:43 (UTC)

I'm Sora! And alright, what do you wanna hear? The first time I fought the Darkness, the second time, or the Coliseum tournaments? I can even tell you about a bunch of the worlds and bad guys and all their stupid plans I stopped!

[ uuuuunfortunately, challenges and doubting him are a quick way to get sora trying to prove himself. whoops.

world order? what world order? ]

[Varric reaches into his coat and pulls out a notebook.]

Right, right. I still think the Coliseum or whatever is probably fixed, but it's your tale, not mine.

Tell me about fighting this 'darkness'. Sounds like a great good versus evil story.

Edited 2014-12-31 20:42 (UTC)

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