perks and rec: the video experience

[stopbleeding]

Who: Chopper and Zoro
Broadcast: fleetwide
Action: UH accendo probably
When: 2/28

[Woah, hi Drift Fleet, it’s the Chopper and Zoro show. Meaning, hi, it’s Chopper sitting on Zoro’s shoulder. They’re on some moon somewhere, who cares. That’s not the point. The point is:]

Oi. This is a public servant announcement.

Service, service! You mean service, Zoro.

Huh? Oh. Yeah. Right. Anyway, listen up! Chopper and I have been testing something out. Chopper, tell them.

Huh? Me? [He looks briefly caught off guard with that before clinging to Zoro’s face in a way that lets him lean forward a bit more.] We found out that you can run faster if you don’t wear any underwear!

[Zoro nods (after extracting Chopper off his face).] Yeah. We did tests. I ran faster without it.

By half a second!

It’s a big improvement. [it’s really not.]

Now everyone can run faster, too! Just forget about your underwear and the half seconds will add up! This could save lives!!

[Zoro nods solemnly, then goes to turn off the feed before remembering something.]

Oh. Right. Old man, Shitty Sculptor. Other people. I’m leaving the ship. And everyone else-[He points at the screen for a long moment, tension rising. Then he points to Chopper.]-he’s a reindeer.

[DON’T FORGET IT, ASSHOLES. Chopper smiles and nods, waving at the screen. Bye, nerds. Peace out.]

ooc: Green is Zoro, pink is Choppa

Comments

[alwayscomeback]

He tried to destroy the sculpture I made of my girlfriend.

But I guess he was less of a jerk than the last guy, so.

How're you doing, Little Reindeer?

[tsundeere]

[He remembered he was a reindeer! Nevermind that it was mentioned in this very post.]

My name is Chopper! [In case he forgot that, too.] Zoro is a nice guy, really! He can be a little rough, but if you get past that, he's got a really kind heart!

Is your sculpture okay?

[alwayscomeback]

Yeah, I remember. Thanks. And I'm sure he's the bestest best best guy ever. [Such sarcasm. ]

Yeah, it's fine. I managed to save it.

[tsundeere]

[What is sarcasm.]

Yeah, that's right, he is! But I'm glad to hear that! If you let him know it's important, he won't mess with it. I'm sure you noticed that, too.

[alwayscomeback]

I'm pretty sure your idea of what a nice guy is, is wildly different from everyone else.

[tsundeere]

Eh? How come?

[alwayscomeback]

Because he pretty much decided my statue was an affront to all senses.

[tsundeere]

But he hasn't tried to destroy it since then, right?

[alwayscomeback]

Well...no.

But I bet he would!

[tsundeere]

No way! He wouldn't do that if he knew its importance.

[alwayscomeback]

Are you sure about that?

[tsundeere]

Yes!

[Do his blank staring cheery eyes say otherwise, Sokka.]

[alwayscomeback]

...You.

You really believe that don't you? [Wow, such unfailing loyalty.]

[tsundeere]

Of course I do! Zoro is one of my best friends! He's family!

[Why would he doubt him!]

[alwayscomeback]

[Oh. That softens Sokka's look of disdain a little. ]

Well, family really is important.

[tsundeere]

Right? Right?

[Nodding along happily, he dances a little on Zoro's shoulder.]

My other family abandoned me, my teacher passed, and Zoro and the others were there to take me in! They mean the world to me!

[alwayscomeback]

[Oh no, don't have a sad backstory, tiny reindeer. ]

Wow. So they really mean a lot to you, huh?

[tsundeere]

[Too late, he has one. He's staring very seriously into the camera now, still from Zoro's shoulder, as a reminder.]

They mean more to me than anything!

[alwayscomeback]

[Oh no, tiny reindeer is too precious.]

Same here. Nothing would be right without them.

[tsundeere]

Exactly, exactly! You must care about your family, too, Sokka!

[alwayscomeback]

They mean more to me than anything in the universe.