06 - video

[winn]

Who: Winn Schott and you
Broadcast: Video
Action: Tourist
When: Friday

[ there's something off about winn when the feed turns on. something different from all his other broadcasts. it may take a second to spot it but once you realize what it is it becomes glaringly obvious: there's not a hint of happiness anywhere on his face. his eyes, his lips, his nose, it looks like every last bit of joy has been drained from his features, so even when his lips do stretch lightly upwards, despite his dry eyes it feels more like watching him sob than seeing him smile. ]

Margaery's gone home. [ he has no way of knowing that. she could have been kidnapped to another world, one where she would have no protective big brother to introduce her to superheroes and feminism, to embroider with her and teach her science. but he chooses to hang onto that thought, to believe that she's gone back to the family he knows she so desperately missed despite never letting her pain show. he clears his throat. ] If any of her friends wanna come by for a toast and some stories, I'll be on the Tourist all day.

[ he has been on the tourist since he realized she disappeared, curled up in his bed, shut down. this is the most he's said since, and it feels almost like an outer body experience. he clears his throat again, and nods at the camera before killing the feed. ]

Comments

[takingkarabusiness]

Well, it was either that, or the Kryptonian equivalent of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

[ she smiles sympathetically and brushes his hair lightly at his temple ]

I would think that, based on our experiences here and at home, you would have more hope for seeing her again.

[winn]

That would be selfish. She wanted to go home, she has a family there.

[ a real family, one that he could never compare to and he would never try. but it's hard, seeing her longing for a world that treated her so terribly, that didn't appreciate her. to him, she's the true embodiment of a hero - despite knowing it would be so much better for her to go elsewhere she never wavered. she was always so determined to make her kingdom a better place for the people living in it, despite the steep personal cost she had to pay. ]

A calling.

[takingkarabusiness]

Seeing her doesn't mean plucking her away from her life. You could visit.

[winn]

It's not like Hank's world or Cisco's. [ he shakes his head. ]

I'd probably be seen as a sorcerer or something and burned at the stake.

[ he tried to make a joke but he's pretty sure it's actually true. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

I'm not sure why other people need to know. I'm pretty sure Cisco can choose where to put a breech.

[winn]

I wouldn't know.

[ there's a hint of bitterness there. he understands why his friend doesn't want to deal with his powers, but there's so much potential to them, especially here, even if they're capped. they could know what happens to the people they've lost. maybe they could see if the memories uploaded to their brains are real or fabricated. maybe they can't do any of that because the atroma could fabricate his vibes too - he doesn't know. but as long as cisco is unwilling to try they can't do anything. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

What do you mean?

[winn]

I mean when I last left National City the multiverse was just a theory.

[takingkarabusiness]

I'm sorry. It must be kind of disorienting to have other people remember more things.

[winn]

[ disorienting is the tip of the iceberg, but he doesn't have it in him to explain it right now. talking as much as he has feels like too much effort as is.

so instead, he just shrugs. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

[ okay, so optimism isn't going to be the trick this time ]

What do you need right now?

[winn]

[ truthfully, he doesn't know what he needs. he has no idea what, if anything, could make this better for him. he knows what he wants to do - and that's to continue to wallow - but that's a bad answer and even now he knows it.

of course, that only serves to make him more upset, withdrawn, miserable.

he wants to go home. real home. and sink into his playstation with a bottle of scotch. ]

Punching the Atroma in the face sounds pretty appealing. [ he's never been a violent man but boy do they bring it out of him. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

I'm not sure I can arrange that, but maybe I can find a mask or something and you can punch me.

[winn]

I'm not sure breaking my hand is the way to go.

[takingkarabusiness]

At least it'd be a distraction?

Do you want a project to work on?

[winn]

I'll pass on that one, my hands are my moneymakers.

[ they are how he projects. and how he fixed ship after ship in the aftermath of the raid.

he shakes his head. yeah, he's so miserable he doesn't want to work. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

[ she checks his forehead with the back of her hand. do you have a fever???? ]

We could just talk about feelings.

[winn]

[ there's a quiet noise from the back of his throat, a muffled scoff, like he's forgotten how to laugh and that's all he can get. ]

Maybe I was too hasty with the hand breaking plan. [ he tries to make a joke, but it doesn't come out particularly joke-like. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

Let's not try it out.

I'm okay with just hanging out here, too.

[winn]

[ he reaches over her to his bedside shelf and grabs his phone from home and the phone cisco's made him. linking them and opening each on a racing game, he hands her one.

it's not a playstation, but it'll have to do. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

Oh, you're on.

[ she moves onto her back so she can play properly ]

[winn]

[ he scoots back, pressing himself against the wall to make more room for her. he doesn't move much, but his fingers fly deftly on the touch screen. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

[ Kara is a lot more animated and no matter quick her reflexes are, Winn is still better at games than she is. She's the sort of player who moves with the game, and runs commentary ]

Oh, almost—Ah! How are you so good at this?

[winn]

The force is strong with me.

[ her enthusiasm is actually making him feel a tiny bit better. he's almost tempted to enter a cheat code to leave her eating his dust, just for the reaction. he doesn't, yet. ]

[takingkarabusiness]

The nerd force.