driftfleet | Do pigeons have feelings?

Who: Adalwolfe Hawke
Broadcast: Yes, video
Action: Yes, Malum or Tourist.
When: In the wee hours of the morning, during drift week

Stop me if you've heard this one.

[Hello fleet, it's a very drunk Adalwolfe Hawke on your feed tonight. Which is weird because usually he doesn't make drunk posts, but hey it's been a hard wee- no, mont-... year? No, not long enough.

Life. It's been a hard life. And sometimes that catches up with him, so hooray alcohol and existential 2am thoughts.]

But, right, so, some people in the fleet are from earlier that other people in the fleet from the same versh.. version of the same world, right? So then would them changing someone when they get back - or if I guess 'cause who knows - would them changing a big thing then change that thing for the people here from later there? If say... Idunno, I was from before all the stuff and decided not to go to Kirkwall, would other stuff have happened instead of my stuff? Would that change all the... the stuff?

[Maker he needs Varric or Carver to translate his drunkspeech. He's not so far gone that he can't tell he's making the least amount of sense.]

Or if-if... I dunno if I should say that nevermind, but you all get my point, right? Is it set in stone? Or is it like... all these different Thedaseses that everyone is from, they just get made when something else changed so it still happened but the other thing happened too, somehow? Uh.

[He frowns into his mug. These are very murky, complicated thoughts. Clearly he needs to wash them off with more alcohol.]

Were we meant to do things or do things just happen even if we don't do anything? You get what I'm trying to say, right?

[Someone? Anyone?]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

That's a good quote.

[It sounds like something out of Anders' manifesto, but he's not about to say that. He doesn't want Kitty to know it's Anders that did such a thing, doesn't want to undermine their friendship.]

I don't know for certain, that's the thing, so the question is if the possibility is worth the risk of nothing better happening at all? And the cost of that possibility is also lives lost.

[He seems to sink down in the frame.]

And if I don't know for sure, then is that a fair reason to leave things as they are?

My whole world was a broken mess because of time traveler who wanted to make things better, so I feel like I could be the first person to tell you to leave the timeline alone. But I don't know if it's that easy either.

You wouldn't even be going back in time? You'd be living your life the way you think it's best to live it, right? You'd just have this knowledge you shouldn't have.

Except you probably won't since no one seems to when they "go back" if that's really going back so this is all an academic exercise in torturing yourself?

No, the thing is, it could just end here. I can't really get into the details, but it's doubtful Atroma could bring this person back.

[He's treading dangerously close to Kitty likely being able to figure it out. Maybe she has already, he's too drunk to tell, but he needs to work this out.]

And without this person, it wouldn't have happened. I don't know what would happen to us, though, having already lived through it, if we were ever to go back. If it would actually change anything or just change the Thedas he's from...

[It's too much and too confusing and he finds his drink much simpler.]

[She isn't sure and there are more people from his world and honestly she's not even sure how many since she didn't even really know about Riona until recently. Fenris and Anders are the ones she knows the best though, so her thoughts point in their direction as much as she lets herself speculate. After all, it's also a little confusing both from the complexity and her rough understanding of his world and from the drunken narrator.]

Why wouldn't the Atroma be able to bring them back? I mean it would be one thing if they were dead back home, but if they have a future of setting this off there then that's not the case.

They're... special. Not human, or really mortal? It's complicated, but suffice to say they may not be able to. Go with me on that.

[He lets out a long breath.]

But if they don't do that thing, thousands if not millions of mages may never be freed... There would be those of us who would still work towards it, I'd like to think, but this one act - though it killed so many - does eventually lead to freedom. I don't want to change that part of it. If it's even possible.

[He runs his hands down his face.]

Are we talking about Justice? [Since he's pretty complicated. Though she's also not sure she can see him doing the thing mentioned. Though she's not sure why not given that she really doesn't know much about him or what he is and how that plays out in the world around him.]

The person I mean. Not the general concept. Even if he's kind of both maybe.

I-- Yes.

[What is he supposed to say when she guesses it outright? No, some other spirit from Thedas that's in the fleet?

He sits back a bit, just waiting for it to dawn on her that he's talking about essentially murdering a person for what they will do in the future but it may not even be his future that's affected, or it may change the course of history for the worse...

There are so many things wrong with this.]

Okay, I know I was supposed to go with you on the Atroma not being able to bring them back part, but they brought us here. They bring people back to life. They make people younger or take their memories or shift them into different bodies. They do all kinds of things they shouldn't be able to do. I know Justice is different, but they brought him here just like anyone else. I've seen gods and demons and angels tossed around by forces like this. [She's thinking more at Marina for a lot of that but if she could be shifted here from there maybe it's all part of a larger picture.]

I don't think there's any real reason to believe he's immune or that we have any power over the ways our worlds develop from here no matter what we do. [Not that it's easy to give up that thought. Who wants to feel powerless and under someone else's control? They have so much artificial freedom here. It's just a long leash.]

And even if you could it doesn't sound like you have a clear idea that you should and this is the kind of thing you want to be really fucking sure about, you know?

Yes... I--... yes, you're right.

[He's not sure if he has an obligation to try though, even if it's unlikely that it will amount to anything. When trying means killing someone too, even someone you're on dubious terms with for a myriad of complicated reasons pertaining to the very problem, then is it really an obligation or simply an option? And does he even want to do it for the pure reasons he's outlined to Kitty, or is there some part of him that just wants revenge for everything that went sideways in Kirkwall? He can't answer that question.

And Kitty's right, if he's unsure, he shouldn't act.]

Thank you, that helps with perspective.

[He's still going to drown in a beer or fifteen though, don't mind him.]

Just.. do me a favor and don't tell Anders I was even considering this, alright?

I'm glad. [Though she isn't sure exactly what he's thinking or if this is really done or still stewing for him.]

Mmm, yeah, I don't think Anders would like the idea very much. [He seems very attached to Justice and very much trying to help him and support him. She wonders how that dynamic plays out between Wolfe and Ander's in their relationship. Her response also isn't exactly a promise not to tell, but she doesn't intend to at least under current circumstances.]

Also...isn't Justice kind of a telepath? [She wonders how he'd feel about picking this information up.]

No. No he wouldn't.

[He presses his mouth into a thin line. He's had to make a lot of decisions that he knows Anders wouldn't like. But maybe he shouldn't be. Maybe his natural tendency to want to do things should be curbed here. If Kitty is right there's nothing he can do anyway.]

Sort of. I think there's something blocking him sometimes, otherwise what sparked this whole mess he would have found out the first day he arrived.

[She nods.] In most cases I know about, you have to be thinking about the thing while they're actively listening. [But Justice isn't exactly like anyone she's known even if some of the powers are familiar.] And I'm sure the augments do what they want. [She knows it trimmed off some of Xavier's prowess while he was here.]

So, have you and Anders talked about any of this? [Obviously not the plan, but maybe parts associated with it?]

Do pigeons have feelings?

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