driftfleet | Mistletoe Mingle!

What, so it keeps out something other than that shit? Like what?

[ Another attempt, and nope, he's not going anywhere and also his nose aches from walking right into an invisible wall. Well shit. Again. ]

...Like normal folk. Betrayed by a fucking plant.

[ alucard does briefly pinch his brow, his one momentary lapse in decorum before he approaches trevor. ]

You could have simply asked me. Were you watching me the whole time?

Of course I was. This shit was hilarious.

[ It's not any more, of course, now that he's the victim. ]

Go get your books. I'll figure out how to get out of this before I go drink myself stupid.

I cannot leave, Belmont. The plant no longer simply represents a bane to dark magic and unearthly powers.

It is meant to facilitate . . . physical congress. Such as a kiss.

'Facilitate physical congress'. So that's a fancy way of saying that plants are fucking perverts.

[ The fuck? The fuck. Plants are weird. And if he ever trusted them he sure as fuck does not trust them any more. ]

So I have to kiss someone and then the stupid fucking plant lets me go so I can go work on drinking until I forget it?

[ the slightest thread of good humour flashes through his face. alucard briefly wonders if it's just worth watching trevor put the pieces together.

and it is. just barely. ]

Yes. Someone within the same vicinity.

Shit. Fine. Give me your hand.

[ If he's going to have to do this no matter what, then he's going to make it weird. It's important to make sure your vampire's day is ruined. ]

[ this is hilarious, even if alucard hates it a little. ]

Are you going to use your noble manners on me, Belmont? It may not be enough as you are surely rusty.

Please. This is probably your first fucking kiss anyway. Can't imagine anyone's in a hurry to get close to those teeth.

[ Is it time for bickering and cheap shots? Hell yes it is time for bickering and cheap shots. ]

Hand. Now. Unless you want me to take this opportunity to shut your fucking mouth.

[ that is the cheapest shot, how dare you. alucard bares his teeth a little, pointedly. ]

Careful, Belmont. You wouldn't want me to bite you.

You wouldn't.

[ HE'S GOING TO TAKE IT AS CONFIRMATION THAT HE WAS RIGHT and he is going to laugh and laugh and laugh. ]

But shit, seriously? Does this mean that I have to be nice about it?

[ alucard crosses his arms, in a mild huff. ]

It certainly would not hurt.

Shit. Seriously.

[ He repeats, and this time it seems a little less funny. This is coming uncomfortably close to being Responsible For An (1) Emotion, which is Trevor's actual least favorite thing. ]

Look, if you want to wait for someone who isn't an asshole to show up for this, I've loitered in worse doorways than this.

[ alucard hesitates only briefly before shaking his head. ]

No, Belmont. For better or worse, our fates are intertwined. I would prefer you above all others.

Well shit. Watch yourself, you almost said something nice

[ He just stares at Alucard for a while after that, contemplative. Because that was also dangerously close to One Whole Emotion. Eventually, he reaches out a hand. ]

Hand. [ Because he's not the kind of asshole who goes about taking people's first kisses if they're exactly the sort of dramatic idiot who probably thinks that kind of shit is important. Best for it to be something that can be written off as not really counting if needed. ]

[ why is it super effective, damn him. alucard stares, a myriad of indescribable emotions flitting through before he extends his hand. he's not sure what he'd do if trevor actually kisses his hand. die of embarrassment??? die??? dying seems legitimate. ]

[ Something that can be easily written off. Something that won't result in emotions other than annoyance. He can do this. He's good at not inspiring emotions other than annoyance.

If in doubt, just do the stupidest possible thing.

And so he kneels. As best he can in the confined space. And bows his head. ]

I, Trevor Christopher Belmont of the House of Belmont, do hereby swear my loyalty to you and your fucking stupid suicidal patricide cause.

[ Well it started off convincing, at least. He presses his lips softly against Alucard's knuckles. ]

[ loyalty. alucard doesn't shiver, but his amber eyes go slightly warm and he squeezes trevor's fingers slightly. ]

"Christopher"?

[ alucard, you can't talk, your middle name is Fahrenheit. ]

The fuck's wrong with Christopher?

[ He doesn't get up just yet, and he doesn't let go of Alucard's hand, instead using his free one to feel at where the invisible walls were previously. Problem solved. Good. ]

At least it's not just my dad's name backwards.

I never said there was anything wrong with it. And you are already aware that Alucard is not my real name.

[ just his edgelord name for edgelord purposes. ]

It's what you want to be called by, it's real.

[ He does let go of Alucard's hand now, pushing himself to his feet. Emotions averted. Now he doesn't have to be responsible for anything. ]

Are you going to be a shit about this? Because that 'shutting your fucking mouth' business isn't off the table yet.

[ averting emotions works best for both of them. ]

You'd just lose the tongue.

And bleed to death. Worth it.

[ Worth it to shut Alucard up, that is. Not Worth it to kiss him properly. Obviously. ]

[ alucard shakes his head with the slightest touch of fondness. ]

You have an odd idea of what is worthwhile.

Not much that isn't worth shutting you up.

[ Was he meant to be being nice? Nah, probably not. ]

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time to murder a vampire.

he's taking you with him

wow rude

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