driftfleet | Naviadna Mingle

[Hearing someone talking about dying so casually is never going to sound normal, even with her history of being an evil space witch. She can tell Lup is trying to lighten it all up by the end, anyway.

Even so, Honerva listens quietly to her response, head tilted, still sitting so much like a cat on the pool's edge, the water only somewhat lapping halfway between her knees and her ankles.

For her, it had been so very different, everything being technical, instant, so much less immersive. Always - secluded, as it were.

But of course, there it was: the fact that it was taking control of circumstances out of their hands, as well as the necessity of comfort, even over function. It puts to mind other considerations, but for the moment, she only asks,]

Did it always fall to you to create the house?

Nah, not always. Our group had five wizards, so whoever learned it could take turns, give our own little spins on it. Our captain liked it in a cottage style, Lucy made a library, Barry gave it a lab... it was always different.

[Thinking of them hurts - her family, all the people she's loved and missed for so long now - but she's endured a decade without breaking already, so she can manage a little longer.]

But this... this was mine, so it was the best.

Of course it is.

[She might be able to devise a pocket dimension herself with her own magic, but it wouldn't be nearly as pleasant, or feel quite so safe. That would take a lot of work. In a different mindset, she might have appreciated having a lab, but... that was not what she needed.

However, it is because this home is Lup's creation that she can agree that it is the best, and allow her to bask in that sense of... pride. It's only too late that she realizes, again, how long ago it must have been for her, to last summon it or to be in the presence of those others.]

You have been very patient, with my questions.

Right? You're lucky you're you, or I'd be charging by the minute. Information should never be free.

[Unless it's between friends. Which it is, in that case. Although for her and Taako, sometimes even that doesn't mean anything.]

I suppose that all of my luck could not be so poor.

[After all, was it luck, to be drawn here at all? To make such a ... connection? Hard to say.]

With the noise... abated, it helps to fill some of the quiet left behind.

[Fuel for rousing her thoughts, such as they were. She still maintains her odd perch on the edge of the pool, however.]

Yeah... not a big fan of quiet in general, not gonna lie.

[Despite her words, she falls silent for a long moment after that, brows furrowed, lost in thought. It takes her a bit to find the words to continue with, pitifully vague as they are-]

Kinda feels like we're winding up towards the end, whatever that means.

There have been signs... of change, for some time now. To what end, however...

[Hard not to notice, the Fleet growing quieter and quieter, the ships themselves not upgrading, and perhaps even part of why Lup and Thor suddenly transferred in when they did.

That energy from the planet refused to leave her alone, but it did not give her any true insight onto what would come.]

The question remains... if we are truly to have any choice, by the end of all of this, should we be successful in... breaking the path of the Atroma and the forces which brought us here.

Mm.

[Lup glances sidelong at her, brows furrowing.]

Question being... where do we go from here.

[She might not like it - hates it, as a matter of fact, with every fiber of her being, with the sort of panic in her soul that she'd not felt in years - but she knows where she's going. There's no question. She goes where Taako goes, where her heart goes. Where her family is. That choice might not be so easy for other people.]

We...

[She exhales softly, looking down into the water, still lightly trailing her fingers across the surface, swirling them to keep her reflection from manifesting.]

I cannot deny that it has weighed heavily on me for some time. Whatever the reason, whatever the... forces, that brought us out of our universes... how do we continue to hold on to this time?

Dunno. Might be tricky, especially with how memories work when people are sent back the way things are now. It hasn't been a walk in the park or anything, but... in retrospect, I don't feel like losing what happened here.

[Her family has lost enough already- memories are precious, regardless of the what or the how or the why. But there's no voidfish to conveniently broadcast it here.

She splashes one foot listlessly against an edge of the bath.]

I don't have a choice in going back, though. One way or another, that's how it'll end for me.

You go where he goes, of course. And he... wants to return.

[That much was clear, for all Taako had tried to get himself home and had all but exploded himself in the process.]

It's not just that. I mean, it is, at the core of it, but...

[She huffs a frustrated breath, hugging her knees to her chest beneath the water.]

The thing we need to get his memories back... it's there. I won't get him back for real until we've settled everything, and that's not going to happen anywhere else. Hell, even if that wasn't an issue, I've got some unfinished business to resolve. [And a Hunger's ass to kick.] I won't be satisfied otherwise.

No matter what you face, your resolve is strong. I admire that in you...

[For all Lup had gone through, even at her own hands. That sense of what would be waiting for her, should she return right back to where she was. Forgotten in that umbrella. The recoil from the elf's soul still lingered with her; it wasn't often that she was so affected by another's pain. Those powers of... evocation.

And she thought of her own resolve, how it had cracked under Loki's scrutiny. Even if her own memories were intact, her own universe was still a mess of her own making, to some degree. There was no place for her there.]

... however, I would have you know this. I... I do not want to lose you, Lup.

...I mean, duh. I'd miss me too.

[A soft snipe with no venom attached; there's a smile on her face, small and struggling.]

Not to be that asshole, but you're gonna lose something, no matter what happens. So I guess the question is... what do you want more? What path do you think will lead you to some kind of happy ending?

[Will she go home and try to mend things with her kid, or find somewhere else that she might belong?]

A path toward happiness...

[She's quiet for a moment, reflecting on the first time Lup had mentioned that she could even be capable of finding some happiness. When she had wondered if it was possible for her to feel it at all.

Much had changed since then. She had her faint, memories of when she was last happy, much more locked away still. There was so much to lose, one way or the other.]

Even if I were able to keep my memories, and this... understanding, my son made it very clear when we last spoke that... he did not want me present in our universe. The mother that he envisioned... was a far greater ideal than... what I am now.

[Her hand stills, reflection appearing over the water as she looks down at herself, before she stirs it away again, sending gentle ripples across the surface.]

... Meanwhile, our war is still there. The Emperor... is not as he was. I would not even have Kova... only, my darkness. In my time here I have come to realize that it would not be... a happy path.

[Ah... Lotor said that, huh? She hadn't been aware. Things had been delicate after they'd returned from the Marsiva and he vanished, and Lup had been in no state to try and maintain her own mental health, nevermind anyone else's. She felt like shit for not trying harder at the time, but... she's only one person, and she'd already been hanging by a thread. It's likely that her "help" wouldn't have been all that useful.

That feels doubly true, hearing that. If he'd rejected her utterly, if she'd already lost her husband, if the galaxy's a huge mess, if there's nothing there for her...]

...Fuck it, then. Come back with us.

[Honerva couldn't blame Lup for focusing more on her own mental health after, when she had been the one to encourage Lup to do what she needed to do to hold herself together, with what they had shared. Being trapped on the Marvisa had done a number on both of them.

And yet she been carrying that painful burden of Lotor's words for a while, dreading... everything that might come.

Importantly, Lup had kept her company, and that had helped. It was more than she would have gotten anywhere else. And there's something... lifting about those words, as much as she feels the little seize and tremble of her heart, at being asked. Wanted. She's quiet for those few moments, though she had so much time to weigh it all before. Different now, to finally have the conversation. She lifts her gaze back toward Lup, trying to give her own small smile, gratitude juxtaposed with the gravity of it all. ]

... May I? That... would make me happier.

[Not without it being bittersweet, but if this was a choice she could still make now it had to count. There was really no doubt, though.]

We could... call it a beginning, instead of an... end.

Sure, why not? You'll be free, and that means freedom to choose for yourself. What's the point in going home if you know it'll make you miserable?

[Lup whistles loudly, and a moment later one of the spectral servants floats in with a tray of sweets from the kitchen and some piping tea. She wastes no time snagging a chocolate, popping it into her mouth.]

The world, and I guess the universe I was born in doesn't exist anymore- it was swallowed up by some giant Eldritch space monster with existential hangups. I probably can't ever go back there, even if we kill that thing. And you know what? I don't care. I wouldn't go even if I could- not to live there, definitely. There's no family waiting for me, no cozy fireplace, no house or husband. If we manage to save the world that Taako and me are going back to? That's where my family is, where all my friends are. That's home.

[She sinks further into the water, lips curving into a relaxed smile. Now that it's out there, and Honerva's reacted positively to it, she can be more at ease.]

And you'd be welcome there, if it's what you want.

[She listens to Lup's words, feeling the aching familiarity in most of them. The worlds she had once called home were long gone, and Central Command was only ever a base. And family... that stung most of all, but that was her reality. She had come back to herself too late. Centuries too late. Millennia too late. Clinging to the hopes of the past that could not be.

But the freedom to make such a choice... to know she would be welcome.

She exhales softly, and at last she eases herself fully into the pool, to join Lup. It was more comfortable than she had expected, once she was able to put off the discomfort of such immersion. It was only water, a substance so mundane and yet... so refreshing.]

... it is.

[Even the words are easier to say now that they're out there. And... she remembers, something very important. About not having to be alone, and that went for Lup as well -- and it would be difficult to hold to that, across a spread of universes, drowned in misery. Time to defeat those expectations. She holds out a hand toward her.]

We are friends, after all.

[Lup accepts the hand, shaking it at first, as if making a deal- and the touch lingers after, something more quietly accepting and intimate. This is no formal business transaction. As Honerva said-]

Damn right we're friends.

[There's no hesitation as she responds, although there is a pause afterwards, as it clicks: just what she's offering, here.]

Oh, shit- right. Uhhh, fair warning, though? We're kinda facing the apocalypse, so your stay might not be as long as you'd like. Iiiiif we lose. I mean, I think we'll make it? I have it on good authority that we do? But I haven't lived it yet, so... it's gonna be a shitshow for a while. So try not to let first impressions spoil it for you? If impending doom doesn't make you think twice, that is.

[She doesn't falter; it wasn't as if she had made the choice on a whim.]

Trading one war for another, is it...

[An understandable thing, for all Lup had already said they had gone through. A darkness that sought to consume... but even she had been brought back.

If nothing else, she takes protecting what's important to her very seriously.]

You will see it through. We will. That will not deter me. It is the adjustment that I would have to prepare for... depending on how this goes, and your separate timelines, there is... no telling where I may turn up there.

Yeah, if you get to pick a timeline to roll with, I suggest Taako's. At least that way you'd get longer than five minutes to acclimate, and he can help you out. I'm not gonna be much use for a while no matter what route you go with.

[She shrugs. The downside of being a magical household object: not much good for providing world tours.

...well, among others, too.]

I appreciate the vote of confidence, though. I kinda like the thought of quasi-surviving the end of the world.

... either way, I will bring you back all the sooner.

[Strange new world facing costly consequences or not, Honerva always feels better when she has a purpose in mind. It's what makes adapting to the time in between harder--she'd always moved from one purpose to another, and any time she hadn't was gone from her memories. Aside from the time on the Fleet.]

It is time that we both stopped losing, after all.

[Provided nothing messed with their memories, but that would be one more bridge to cross. Taako's situation might be more complicated, but... they would have to deal with that.]

....Oh. Oh, shit, I didn't even consider that one.

[If Honerva manages to get there- if she holds on to her memories- she'd remember Lup, remember where she is. And even if the voidfish somehow interferes, surely she'd be able to retain some memory of a person being trapped in the Umbra Staff, right? That info hadn't been fed to Fisher, so it couldn't be blocked by the static. It isn't guaranteed that she would know who until she was inoculated, but... it could work. It could totally work.]

It might be tricky, but... holy shit would I ever owe you one.

Tricky... that is one way to put it.

[She pauses suddenly, as she gives a soft, quick laugh.]

For that matter, I realize I have never once asked the name of your world... and we would have to find a way to explain our connections. Following the thought that some part of my arrival would manage to work in our favor... [Like her managing to get there at all. If she could hold fast to the knowledge about the Umbra Staff and the importance of who was trapped within it, those were other factors they would have to prepare for.] At least I should be asking you the right questions.

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