driftfleet | JULY PLANET MINGLE

[It's not fair, and Caesar knows it. In a way, it's a deliberate self-sabotage. He knows Joseph loves winning as much as he does, knows that an easy victory will distract him from everything that happened on the beach, during a day that Caesar still can't determine an unmitigated failure or a resounding, bizarre, confusing success. Part of him wants desperately to distract Joseph, and part of him wants desperately to distract himself. Drink and new things and odd food and Joseph smiling will do that. He knows at least two of these things from experience.]

[His hand shifts to Joseph's shoulder again, and Caesar smiles, a little distant, facing forward into the setting sun.]

Deal, [he says, and then, almost as an afterthought,] Sometimes you're a very wicked person, Jojo.

[Which isn't what he wants to say. He wants to say You're the best person I know, and the most important person in the world to me. In the universe. My biggest mistake was leaving you behind.]

[He can't imagine a world in which it would be safe to say any of this. So he swallows it with the last of the seawater in his mouth and keeps walking.]

Edited 2015-07-21 03:01 (UTC)

[Joseph hangs back for just a second because he's not always the most observant, but he does notice some of the distance in Caesar's smile. Naturally, he wonders what it's all about. He's trying to ignore what happened (if something even happened in the first place) and focus on keeping things a light competition as always. He thought Caesar was there with him, but then he seems miles away for a brief moment and he doesn't know what to make of it.]

[Brushing it aside since thinking in circles won't do him any favors, Joseph catches up quickly enough and even gets ahead of Caesar by a couple of steps, turning to walk backwards. Which is probably not his best idea given Joseph's level of coordination (never mind it's Caesar that knows where they're going, not Joseph), but he trusts that if he's going to fall down it will be by Caesar's choice. So, he probably doesn't have anything to worry about. Probably.]

I know! It always catches people off-guard. Wanna know why? [He doesn't actually wait for Caesar to answer. Dramatically, he places a hand over his heart.] It's my naturally gentle and kindhearted disposition.

[He grins, looking absolutely smug and full of himself as he believes he ought to. Because he's great. He doesn't just think that, he knows it. It's simply fact.]

Or if that doesn't get them, then my good looks certainly disarm them. They convince themselves there's absolutely no way I could be so devious, but that's all part of my cunning strategy.

You could learn a thing or two from me, Caesarino.

[There's absolutely no way to avoid looking at Joseph now. It's flatly impossible. Which might be the point, Caesar thinks, half-listenin. If Joseph noticed him retreating into himself, his first action would be trying to distract him. And Joseph is very good at being distracting. It's practically his primary skill.]

I could learn a thing or two from you. [His voice is a little numb at first, but then it comes out stronger, sharper, indignant, only a little forced.] From you? I don't think so, idiota. I'm the one who just caught you offguard, remember? Or did your little fish wipe your memory for you, too?

[He shoves Joseph in the chest with both hands, hard enough to make him stumble but not fall. He can feel old familiar things burning in him: irritation, competitiveness, a flicker of anger. They comfort him. Feeling bad is much more natural than feeling as though the stars have realigned themselves while he's been playing a game he doesn't understand.]

[Joseph catches his balance fairly smoothly, his grin not wavering for a second. Caesar's responding exactly how he expected and it feels much better.]

One time. [He holds up a finger again.] You caught me off-guard just one time. Don't start getting an even bigger ego, Caesar, or there won't be enough room for everyone else on the beach.

And you seriously need to stop talking shit about that fish, or you're gonna have to stay out of the water the rest of the time we're here.

[He catches up to Joseph, shoves him again, his feet skidding for purchase in the sand. Better, better, much better; nothing happened, nothing will happen, nothing's bothering either of them. Things are as they have always been.]

One time. And it'll be twice tomorrow and three times the next day, until you can't count high enough to count the times I've beaten you. [This grim, solid as a promise, though who knows, really - and then Caesar narrows his eyes and proclaims in a loud, clear voice:]

Your fish. Is shit.

[So there.]

[Joseph manages to catch himself again, this time with a laugh. He even laughs through all of Caesar's assertions of superiority until the fish gets dragged into it. Then his jaw hangs open for a long moment before he scoffs.]

[He shakes his head gravely.]

When it starts trying to pull you down into the sea, don't say I didn't warn you, Caesar. You should do the right thing and apologize now while you've still got the chance.

I'll never apologize to your fish.

[This is the stupidest thing he's ever said. Why is he saying it? Why does he say and do all the most ridiculous things when Joseph's around? It's insane.]

[Huffing, he shoves Joseph away by pushing him in the middle of his forehead.]

Come on, you - you - come on. I thought you said you were hungry.

[And - as reckless, as insane, as impossible as he's feeling - he grabs Joseph by the hand and takes off up the beach before he can think better of it.]

[All Joseph can really do is just shake his head in mock-disappointment at a Caesar's stubbornness about his fish, as though truly convinced that Caesar will come to regret this clearly terrible decision. But he doesn't get a chance to come back with anything. Before he can even get his mouth open to speak, Caesar catches him off-guard (again) and has a hold of his hand, pulling him along the beach.]

Hey! Wait up!

[Joseph stumbles the first few steps, but once he's got his balance he's good and able to keep up.]

[He looks over his shoulder - once, briefly, just to make sure Joseph's keeping up - and sees the look on his face, the surprise, and grins, triumphant again.]

I won't! Run faster!

[Another little competition. He doesn't know who'll win, but he knows they'll both arrive at the restaurant panting and covered in sand. Which is enough to make him squeeze Joseph's hand and laugh into the wind as they leave the beach behind.]

[If Joseph wanted to, he could probably outrun Caesar. He's only a few inches taller, but he still has a longer stride. But he doesn't push himself that hard. He's not all that bothered by following Caesar. In fact, there's a part of Joseph that delights in it. Caesar's hand squeezes his and Joseph's hold on his hand tightens, not daring to let Caesar slip away. It's almost as if he's afraid of what it would feel like to have Caesar's fingers slip past his. But also, in a way, it feels like old times. Joseph isn't dangling over a dangerous height for a change, but there's something nostalgic about holding on this tightly to one another.]

[When they make it to the restaurant, Joseph comes to a skidding halt behind Caesar. He bends over for a moment in trying to catch his breath, one hand on his knee and the other still in Caesar's for a few moments longer before he lets go and rests it on his other knee.]

[With a breathless laugh he looks up at Caesar and says,] If I wasn't hungry before, I could probably eat enough that these guys can close for the day and still turn a profit.

[He takes one last big breath of air and straightens himself out.]

[Joseph looks like a mess. His hair's in his face, there's sand up to his knees, and he's red in the face. Caesar is deliberately not thinking about how he looks, because there's nothing to be done about it now that Joseph's smelled food.]

[Still, it's - what was the word he'd decided on before? Endearing? - to see his friend so disheveled. Slicking his own wet hair away from his forehead and smiling, at Joseph and at the surprised-looking waitstaff who've poked their heads outside to see what the commotion is.]

Good, [he says, breathing heavy through his nose as his heart rate slows.] That's what you want, isn't it? To eat all the food off of this island while you're here so you don't have to eat space food?

[He gestures briefly at one of the waitresses whose face he recognizes from the last time he was here - table for two - and she slips away, gesturing for them to follow after. Caesar claps his hand on Joseph's shoulder.]

Come on, Jojo, or you'll start devouring the walls.

Edited 2015-07-21 07:41 (UTC)

The walls? [Joseph says with an indignant huff, shrugging Caesar's hand off. He fixes his hair as he follows after the waitress. Of course, his indignation is perhaps a little misplaced.] I'd start with the furniture, not the walls. That'd be way easier for them to replace.

[When they're seated, Joseph immediately intervenes.]

No, he doesn't get a menu. He can have the drinks menu.

[The waitress looks questioningly back and forth between Joseph and Caesar, but Joseph is insistent enough that she does as she's been asked. Joseph props the menu up like a screen in front of him and for a few minutes, points to various items asking her to describe it to him quietly. Eventually there is a "I'll have that," but it's a while longer before "He'll have that" and Joseph has to hide his grin behind his fist because he doesn't want to offend her with what he's doing. He's a little unsuccessful, but at this point, the waitress seems to just think he's a little odd. You know, the Typical Joseph Effect. So hey...]

[But he's feeling dastardly and particularly triumphant because there's absolutely no way Caesar is going to stomach this. Joseph is more or less certain that Caesar's going to end up picking off Joseph's plate instead. Joseph leans forward enough to rest an elbow on the table, sending Caesar that devious and wicked grin as he closes the menu and lets the waitress take it from him.]

[Caesar sends the waitress a few reassuring smiles to offset Joseph's bizarre behavior as well as he can - he's been here a few times, they know each other at least by name, and he hopes she trusts him not to bring a madman into her restaurant.]

[It takes him significantly less time to decide on drinks to start than it does Joseph to decide on entrees. This doesn't surprise him in the least - he set this trap for himself, after all. For Joseph, he chooses something he's decided is more or less analogous to mead, sweet and refreshing; for himself, a heavy, dry liquor that he's only tasted once and can't quite place. Ordinarily he'd choose something more like wine, but wine doesn't get him as drunk as he'd like to be tonight.]

[When Joseph is done ordering, Caesar orders as well, then quietly and politely places his hand on top of the drinks menu. They'll hang onto it for the moment, he says, and she goes away.]

[At which point he turns his attention to Joseph's wicked grin and sighs.]

What have you done, Jojo? Are you planning to poison me? That's cheating, you know.

I should be offended that you put so little faith in me. [But he can even put his grin away long enough to even look the part of even mildly offended at the accusation. He's far too pleased with himself.] Besides, I have to take a bite of it, too, remember?

[Just one bite. One bite that will probably be very difficult to stomach truth be told. But it's one bite compared to having to eat all of it. Joseph will just have to try for the least...slimy...and...twitchy part. That's right, less twitchy. That's about the only reason why Joseph is grinning this much because there's no way Caesar is going to put up with a dish that's still sorta moving. But he's going to let Caesar discover that surprise all on his own rather than spoil it.]

[Ah, the look on Caesar's face is going to be priceless.]

Wicked, [he pronounces softly, leveling an accusing finger at Joseph.] Absolutely evil.

[And then their drinks come, and Caesar's distracted. He slides the mead across to Joseph with one finger, then letting his head rest on his fist as he traces the moisture beading on the outside of his own glass.]

You always have to push, don't you. I've never met anyone who pushes me so much.

[It feels strange, saying aloud what they both know. But it would be an awful lie to act like he's not grateful.]

[The moment Joseph's glass is given to him, he starts taking a drink so at first he just mm's questioningly at Caesar. This stuff's good. He doesn't know what the hell it is exactly, but it hits the spot just right. He sets the glass down with a small ah (since it's Joseph and he can't do anything quietly to save his life) and licks his lips. It's really good and Joseph never lacks in enthusiasm when he likes something.]

I don't push you, [he lies. He knows full well that there are times when he very intentionally and blatantly pushes and pulls on Caesar. He has since the first day they met with a series of antagonistic behaviors mean to rile him up. At first, it was because Joseph didn't like him and wanted to prove that a guy that cool could lose it. But now? Well, it's sometimes just for the sake of pissing Caesar off, but it comes from a much better, kinder place no matter what his reasons are.] I think you just mean I'm the first person you've ever felt threatened by. It's understandable. I've got a lot of really great qualities, and you have to admit, I have a way with people.

[...If by "way with people" he means irritating them until they like him, s-sure...]

[A sense of satisfaction licks at Caesar at how well Joseph likes his choice. It occurs to him that there are a thousand worse things in the world than the prospect of providing Joseph with meals that will make him so stupidly, simply happy. It wouldn't really be a loss at all. His pride would sting, but otherwise it would be no great hardship.]

[His lips twitch at Joseph's proclamation. To keep from smiling, he picks up his drink and throws half of it back; it burns in a pleasantly distracting way. When he sets his glass down, any trace of a smile is gone, replaced by a curious raised eyebrow.]

Tell me about your really great qualities, Jojo. Since you so obviously want to.

[Joseph seems to consider it for a moment before he decides, oh so generously to do just that. But it's not like Joseph needs much of an invitation. He loves talking, but he especially loves talking about himself. Particularly when he gets to brag.]

Well, since you asked--though I'd hope you would have noticed by now--I'll give you a few. If I listed all of them, we'd be here all night. Possibly into the morning.

[Sometimes it's really hard to tell if Joseph really believes that or not even for him.]

I'm not the smartest, but I am really clever. I'm also funny. And don't tell me I'm not because you laugh at what I say all the time. [And yes, he knows that's not always because he actually said something intentionally funny, but he'll gloss over those details.] I'm tough to beat because of my fighting spirit, but I'm actually a pretty gentle person. I don't think you'll meet anybody nicer than I am.

[He sighs as though he couldn't possibly be any greater than he is before he starts teasing again.]

Really, Caesar, you are incredibly lucky to know me. You might wanna appreciate that a little more before I find a new best friend.

[Not that he would or really could find anyone that was like Caesar. He doesn't know if they'd be this close if circumstances hadn't been exactly as they were with his life hanging in the balance, Caesar after revenge, and both of them in for an intense month of training. It... Well, it doesn't really seem like they would to Joseph. Not that they couldn't have maybe learned to get along, but their paths may have never crossed or, if they did, it would have been even briefer and less important. But what it seems isn't what Joseph would hope for because he'd hope they still would. Against all odds, he'd hope they'd still be close friends. He's not one to believe in fate or anything like that, but Joestar and Zeppeli are names with history and destiny together. They'd have to find a way to each other eventually.]

[Still, he dangles the playful threat without meaning a word of it.]

[Oh, he's noticed. It had actually taken a remarkably short time, after their initial clash, for Caesar to realize the remarkable qualities of the man he'd spent so much time and energy hating. In the beginning, Joseph wasn't kind to him, but he was clever and funny and frustratingly impossible to beat. The word is charming, Caesar thinks. Joseph has an effortless charm about him. It works even agains enemies, or men who want to believe they're his enemies.]

[He can't imagine a world in which he could resist Joseph Joestar. Their friendship is something inescapable, the only iteration of destiny that Caesar feels unequivocally positive about.]

[He finishes his drink, waves for another. That's better.]

You're so in love with yourself, you might as well be your own best friend.

[Very carefully, he doesn't agree with anything Joseph's said, even though all of it's true. He's got a big enough head already.]

Edited 2015-07-21 23:07 (UTC)

That's kinda pathetic, don't you think? I'm hard not to love even for myself, but that'd be really sad to be my own best friend, [he says, crinkling his nose. But then he shrugs.] At least I got something to fall back on when you decide not to speak to me again after what I ordered for you.

[He's right back to gloating and taunting like he's already won this new competition before it's even really begun. He's also now pointedly ignoring that he has to have a bite of it as well since the minutes and seconds until then are ticking down. The less he thinks about it, the better. But that doesn't mean he can't still get his punches in with Caesar now.]

[Caesar raises his eyebrows, beginning (very belatedly) to feel some serious misgivings about his life and his choices.]

Even if I didn't speak to you, I think you'd still talk to me. You don't know how to stop talking, even when it would be smarter to be quiet.

[He can very clearly visualize Joseph trying to break up his silent treatment, making stupid faces at him, cracking ridiculous jokes, leaning on him heavily so that he has to stoop and duck away. Joseph would never be able to be his own best friend, because then who would he annoy?]

[His refill shows up, and Caesar prods it across the table the same way he passed Joseph's across: with the tips of his fingers.]

Try this.

[It's okay, Caesar. Just approach it with an open mind and who knows? You might like it. Okay. Probably not. But it's a nice thought to hold onto.]

[But he's completely right on all fronts. Joseph doesn't know how to do quiet very well. Quiet leads to thinking and he doesn't like doing that too much. That doesn't stop him from looking a little offended though as he catches the glass.]

That's another one of my great qualities. I don't hold grudges. I don't know why you're complaining so much.

[Joseph may have a short temper and he may get explosive at times, but he has a pattern of forgiving and forgetting pretty quickly and easily. And why shouldn't he? If there's anything his life has taught him so far, it's that life is far, far too short to spend it angry with people you care about. Or at least angry enough that it gets in the way of what's important as the case seems to be between them lately.]

[He knocks back some of Caesar's drink and almost immediately makes a face. He's not overly fond of dry drinks in the first place, but he wasn't expecting it. The burn is at least pleasant on the way down as he slides it back to Caesar. He also tries to save face by not immediately trying to get the taste out of his mouth with a drink from his own glass. At least not right away. But his eyes do subconsciously dart to it for a brief second.]

Since when does a fussy wine drinker like you drink something like that?

I'm not complaining.

[He's just saying. There are some true things about Joseph, and one of them is that he doesn't know when to shut up.]

[It's hard to hide a smile at the face Joseph makes. In fact, it was hard to keep from smiling when he put the drink to his lips; Caesar knows something about Joseph's tastes, and they don't lean this way. But who knows? Maybe he's expanded his horizons.]

[Apparently not. Caesar ducks his head and takes the drink back, then, seeing the longing glance toward the mead, reaches across the table and pushes it forward.]

Maybe my tastes are more varied than you think they are. Maybe I'm trying something new. Maybe I want to get very drunk.

[At least one of these things is true.]

[No, goddammit. He's not gonna do it. He's not gonna drink the thing. Joseph lightly drums all of his fingers on the table until, okay, fuck it. He's drinking the thing. He can't get that taste out of his mouth fast enough, but God is he relieved when it's gone. That's much better.]

[Their waitress returns, but not with their entrees just yet. She's placing breadsticks down and informing them their entrees will be out in about another five minutes before leaving again to wait on other tables. Joseph picks up a breadstick, frowning at it suspiciously because he can already tell it's like the other breadsticks at other restaurants and made with algae. He applauds them for their creativity, but man do they ever need to expand their horizons. Everything is so salty. ~~Like Caesar will be in about five minutes with his dinner AAAAYYYYY-O!!!~~]

Remember, no excuses for not clearing your plate. [He levels the breadstick at Caesar.] That includes being too drunk.

[Caesar takes a sip of his drink instead of half-downing it - it's the second round, he can afford to go slow now - and snorts into it when Joseph finally gives in and goes for the mead again. He makes a mental note that Joseph likes sweet drinks and gestures to the waitress. When she comes over, he murmurs something to her low enough that Joseph can't hear, and she hurries away.]

I'm offended by what you're insinuating. [He puts his chin on his hand again and watches Joseph levelly over the breadsticks.] No excuses. I do it or I don't.

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