driftfleet | open mingle post;

Entry tags:

open mingle post;

Who: Everyone on the waystation!
Broadcast: n/a
Action: open to everyone to tag into
When: October 11, 2014

[It sure is a lovely ~~day~~ actually pretty much indeterminate time period out here in the vast darkness of space, isn't it? I bet everyone's enjoying themselves, getting a chance to get off their dinky little ship and stretch their legs. Even on this shitty, empty little waystation.

Where are you, droot flooters? What are you up to? Stay out of trouble, now.]

[ooc: hi everyone! I thought I'd give this a try and see how the game liked it. What we have here is a mass mingle post. Rather than everyone making a bunch of different posts about landing on the station, everyone is invited to post a parent comment with their character out and about, doing something. Everyone else is invited to look at who's posted, tag them, post their own parent comments, thread jack, tag around and generally have a grand old time! It should hopefully be a nice low-pressure way to do some action tagging with each other.

Please tag in if you feel so inclined! Don't be shy to tag around!]

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[looking over curiously]

Yeah?

[ he raises an eyebrow at kaneis before laughing softly. ]

I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours. Fair trade?

[He considers, before giving a slight nod]

Fair. You go first though.

[ he nods. he doesn't... mind. honestly, if kaneis betrays him, riku wouldn't be too surprised--not because he seems the type, either. everyone wants to go home. he wouldn't be surprised if anyone sold him out, but it doesn't matter much to him. as long as they return home, at least. ]

Alright.

[ hm. that just makes him look at the ground as he sits up, crossing his legs and settling a little closer to himself--withdrawing. ]

Ever since I was little, I wanted to go outside of my own world. It was... I knew I couldn't get any stronger where I was, you know? [ probably not. he's not sure; he's not stopping to look at kaneis' expressions. ] I needed to get stronger, to protect my two best friends. An outsider came to the islands one day, he gave me this... power. I didn't know it then, but in my world, being chosen like that isn't something to take lightly. I just thought it'd help me get stronger, like I was meant for something bigger.

I messed everything up, though. I wanted to get off of our island so badly, I opened our home to darkness--and it swallowed everything up, including all three of us. I was too blinded by what I could be--what we could be... all three of us got scattered, and when I realized I destroyed our home, too... there wasn't anything I could do. One of my best friends even lost her heart and wouldn't wake up. [ he sighs, closing his eyes. ] She wasn't dead--it was like those deep sleeps in a fairytale.

I did everything I could to wake her up, but I was so desperate and too weak by then that I let myself be taken advantage of. [ possession is not something he wants to talk about right now. ] In the end, Sora was the only one who could do anything. He saved everyone.

[He listens. Honestly, he's surprised the kid actually said something. It's why he insisted on Riku going first, because he wasn't willing to share his story only to have Riku say nothing in return. So the fact he actually did...]

[It's a story that's familiar. Well, not most of it but there are similar elements. But really, he doesn't know what to say. There's no advice or great comfort he can give the kid. So, he speaks the truth:]

Damn. That sucks.

[ there's a hollow chuckle and riku tips his chin down.

he's pretty sure there's nothing to be done for past mistakes. he just has to keep repenting. ]

Yeah, that's... one way to say it.

[He makes a "hm" noise, and then is quiet for a moment. Finally, he speaks- all while not looking at Riku, but instead at the ground. If this guy is willing to share that he destroyed his own homeworld- it wouldn't be right to share back]

I was born with...I guess you could some sort of power. Or at least, the promise that I could get some sort of power someday. Not really sure how true it actually was, but everyone always treated it like it was. Long as I could remember, I was treated like I was something different.

Thing is...I never wanted any of that. I wasn't any good at that stuff, no one thought I was any good, it caused lots of problems for everyone around me... after awhile, I thought I- [correcting fast] the whole thing was nothing but a big mistake.

So...I ran. Ended up falling into a- well, let's just say a bad crowd. Said if I helped them out, they could do something to pass the power onto someone else- someone who wanted it and would have a better life because of it. [He pauses and gives a self-deprecating little "ha".] It was too good to be true, but I was desperate enough to go along with it.

[It feels weird to say it all. But now that it's coming out, it's hard to stop. What's wrong with someone knowing anyway? He's got nothing really to lose anymore]

They strung me along for years. So did another group with the same promise. [His shoulders slump. Partly out of shame, partly out of exhaustion of remembering] Ending up costing my life. I knew it would- I figured out that part years ago. But...I was so tired of everything that...well, I thought it'd be worth it. I thought that everyone would be better off, the mistake would be undone, and...I'd finally get some rest.

[There's a pause. His eyes squeeze shut for a moment, and when they open- regret and sadness are basically written all over his face]

But none of that happened. [It's probably a good thing he's incapable of tears now] I got brought back to fight in someone else's war worlds away and...from everything I hear about back home - my death meant nothing. If anything...it made everything worse.

[ there's quiet for a moment, and riku--even though he wants to--doesn't really move.

he kind of understands that. no--there's no "kind of", there.

castle oblivion, he'd asked the king to destroy him if he failed in defeating xehanort's heartless. logically, if xehanort won, he could try to overcome him and try again, but riku didn't want that. riku thought, maybe, just maybe... if he wasn't able to defeat him, the only option would be that he ceased to exist.

the only way to destroy xehanort's heartless without defeating him would be to kill riku along with him. he'd thought of it, he'd wanted it as a last resort. to end the suffering of not only himself, but any future worlds, any future people... sora, kairi...

they're motivated by different things, but riku thinks he hit the nail on the head--they are pretty similar. ]

I'm sorry. None of that sounds like an easy burden to have.

[ but he can hope that, like with himself, the horizon had to turn darker before it turned to light. the night is darkest before the dawn. ]

Thanks. [ riku looks over to him now. ] For telling me you knew me.

[During those moments of quiet, Kan- no, Zelos is terrified. He never spoke about his life in that much detail. People would get upset or angry over much less. Even if he had shared so much because Riku had shared that much- he's still scared that he'll get shoved away. That Riku will detest him for it, as much as Zelos detested himself.]

[But that doesn't come. Something else does instead. When he looks back up at Riku, there's surprise written on his face. Sure, there had been people in Exsilium who told him they were glad they knew him. And he would treasure those words. It's why he still held onto that stuffed animal Sophie had given him- as a reminder he wasn't alone.]

[But even those people...none of them had known the full story. Some of them never even learned that Kaneis wasn't his name. He was never sure how much they'd still want him after that. So yeah? Riku doing that? Is pretty moving]

[Though he really isn't one who wants to say his sentimental feelings, so he quickly covers it up by scratching the back of his head, pulling at some of his locks]

Yeah- well, fair's fair right? It'd be creepy if I skulked around, never saying that I knew you.

And you know, telling me your story....I had to say something.

[ugh, he's not good at this]

[ when kaneis looks to him with surprise, riku raises his eyebrows, and dares to give him a little smile.

sympathy is understanding that someone's situation sucks. empathy is having felt that same, or similar pain. riku knows that he's feeling a mix of the two--he's been there before, even if it isn't exactly the same. he shrugs, then, looking away, because looking at him head on makes him feel insecure. he's surprised kaneis didn't just leap away from him, to tell the truth, when he confessed that he'd destroyed his entire homeworld.

part of him was counting on him running away or saying he was a freak. it's certainly a surprise he didn't do any of the above, but riku's not quite sure how to feel just yet. part of him is worried. does he understand the gravity of what riku has said?

he'll just... make sure to keep an eye on kaneis. ]

I dunno. I guess? I probably wouldn't have reached out--I'm not the safest person to be around, if you hadn't already guessed.

[ his eyebrows raise, and his lips part to say something else--before he schools himself. ]

If you hadn't, I wouldn't have held it against you. I feel like I know you a little better, though. [ he tilts his head. ] So you're right... not as much guessing involved, I guess.

[Sadly, he understands exactly the gravity of what Riku said. He's seen worlds destroyed thanks to his time in Exsilium. It hadn't been his own, thank whatever goddess there was - but it had still been terrible and haunting enough.]

[Maybe one day he'll tell Riku that part of the story. Maybe not. Not today though, this conversation is somber enough]

[But at that remark, there is something akin to an amused snort from Kaneis]

Please. Some folks back home would claim I was nothing but a bad omen. [Because seriously he really does have terrible luck] Like I could be scared off by you not being "safe".

But...yeah. Feel like I know you a little better too. More than I did in the other place. [A very slight pause] ...Thanks.

... you're welcome.

[ this is weird. ... friends, besides kairi and sora, they're weird.

riku's always been goal oriented. even here, he has a goal in mind. nothing would stop him from sending everyone home... or so he thought. thinking on it, what is "home", for kaneis? ]

You wouldn't wanna go home, would you? [ it's softer, quiet--like permission for him not to answer. ]

I've been so focused on how to make a plan to get everyone home... that I didn't even think some people might not want to go back.

[Gee thanks Riku. If it makes you feel better, Kaneis is pretty damn weird too]

Don't blame yourself, it's nice you're thinking that way.

[He shrugs, trying to make it not like it's a big deal. It does hurt but...whatever will be, will be.]

But...no. The dead don't come back in my world. Even if there was a way for me to go back, I'm pretty sure all it'd do is cause a lot more problems.

Edited 2014-10-19 05:06 (UTC)

[ he meant actually having friends is weird jeez

but its okay yeah you're also weird ]

Mm. [ he almost wants to ask if he'd prefer...

but that seems out of line. they aren't that close yet. he's not sure he'd ask anyone that, honestly, despite how close they are. if they prefer death... riku doesn't even want to think about that. ]

Maybe you'll find a decent planet. I don't know if they'd send you back to Exsilium or not.

[Hahah yeah good call Riku. That is a pretty complicated question when it comes to Kaneis. He knows by now maybe he doesn't want to die...but as to what else he'd do...]

Ephinea.

[He just blurts the name out, like that's supposed to make sense or something. Hell, with his memories all fuzzy- it barely makes sense to him]

Before I got brought here, I think...I was trying to go to a place called Ephinea.

[ riku turns his gaze to him when he suddenly speaks, and then he gives a quiet hum. ]

Ephinea...

I'll keep that in mind.

[He smirks a little]

You just keep focused on the problems I'm sure you've already undertaken. I'll find my own way.

[He's...not sure what will be at Ephinea, the memories are still so hazy. Hell, he's not even sure if it's the name of a planet or a town or what-- but he has a feeling there's people waiting for him. A life waiting for him. That's good enough, right?]

[ he looks at him and then shakes his head. ]

I don't know what kind of world you come from, but sharing something like that, in my world, means someone's got your back.

I'll handle my problems, but don't think you're going it alone.

Yeah, sure, you say that now- but I know your type. You'll put all your problems on only your shoulders, and then you'll try to pile everyone else's problems on there too. Then you wonder why your blood pressure's so high.

I just rather not add to that.

I know exactly why I'm stressed out, and believe me, helping people with their problems isn't part of it.

[ he rolls his eyes, but it's good-naturedly. ]

Don't worry about it, alright? Never thought you were a worrier.

I'm not a worrier. It's just- what was it you said? "Someone's got your back"? That's all. I'm just trying to have your back.

[He makes a point to look behind Riku at his back]

Your very tensed, stressed out back-- seriously, have you ever considered getting a massage? Sheesh!

[He might be joking around about that part]

[ riku almost immediately straightens, cheeks tinging again. ]

I don't like people touching my back.

[ a moment; ]

But having my back is different.

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