002 - Looks like a discoball and tastes like strawberries and dreams

[wolfuncaged]

Who: Fenris and you!
Broadcast: Video: Fleetwide
Action: Tourist.
When: Today. SPONSOR DROP for all characters who have started a romance aboard the Fleet



[Fenris had a very unsettled night, sleep wasn't the cards after his run in with Cole. Eventually, he does leave his armory to find breakfast. He goes by way of the cargo hold (just to check the horrible little wretch isn't lurking there) but instead finds a gift basket with his name on. Fenris can't read the rest of what's on it, but the gift basket is full of condoms, lubes and other sundries that only naked people will really have use for. Emblazoned on everything is Madame Gertrude's Pleasure Barn. Not only has Fenris been given one, but any character who have decided to indulge in a little romance, up to and including flirting has been sent one. The Fleet has got itself a sponsor. For today, at least.

Fenris is well aware what these things are (thanks, Exisilium) so it's with a largely bemused expression that he turns on his communicator, pointing at the...gift. ]

Please tell me that I'm not the only one who has been given one of these today. I suppose Atroma expects us to be grateful? Though it is roughly as subtle as a brick to the face.

Comments

video;

[serpentis]

[And here's Dorian over the video feed, pulling one of the sparkly condoms between his two hands like a rubber band.]

Oh, you got one, as well?

[Streeeeeeetch and he lets go.

SNAP!]

video;

[wolfuncaged]

[This is going to be a long fucking day. He pinches the bridge of his nose, sighing. Babe don't do that. You'll ruin them. ]

That's not what they're used for, Dorian.

video;

[serpentis]

[He looks it over, and then smiles a little, gesturing as he speaks, the rubber flopping about as he does.]

Well, then, enlighten me!

[wolfuncaged]

[He's just gonna...bury his face in his hands. Groooan. ]

I am nowhere near drunk enough for this.

[serpentis]

That could be easily remedied.

I assume they're related to the bottles and...I can think of several uses but I'm not entirely certain why the contents smell and taste like fruit.

[wolfuncaged]

[Face still in hands, voice muffled. ]

Please don't drink the lube, Dorian.

[serpentis]

The...what? Oh!

[Ohhhhhhhhhhhh. He laughs. It's a poor imitation of an evil Magister laugh.]

You'll have to forgive me for not figuring it out sooner! It's not generally my first inclination to put things in my nethers, you understand.

[And then he changes tone, practically leering.]

We will have to put this all to good use, then.

[wolfuncaged]

At least I didn't have to spell it out to you.

[LIKE HAWKE. Oh but hey, that finally gets a bit of a smirk. ]

That is supposed to be the point, I believe.

[serpentis]

It would be a shame to let an opportunity go to waste. I suspect your ship has better accommodations than mine.

[And thus did Dorian discover the Booty Call.]

[wolfuncaged]

[And lo, the Chantry Sisters did sing. ]

If you consider the floor of the armory 'better'.

[serpentis]

That suits me well enough. Just so long as the door closes. I'll be there soon.

[wolfuncaged]

I shan't be going anywhere.

[Ok, that's a lie, he goes to steal more of the apples that Axel brought to the ship because he still wants to eat some actual food today. ]