driftfleet | the white noise is deafening silence

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the white noise is deafening silence

[In the very early hours of January 20th, as the Marsiva and her captives drift nonchalantly through the depths of the universe, there is a call. Every single personal communicator and console springs to life, spitting out a stream of indecipherable static and showing only gray snow on screen. It continues like this for a few seconds longer, going black and then going staticky, and then the signal switches to the encrypted channel generally used for speaking to the Interceptors when something big goes down.

This is a little more successful. The voice may be familiar to some, at least through the static.]

Zhade here! I trust I ███ your attention? I'm having some ██▓▓ble ██tting through. Some of the ░▓██▓█ are missing. I can't ░▓▓▓ read on their loc█████ns. [A particularly long burst of static.] ███stening. I'll s█▓▓█ more inf██▓▓▓▓▓█ I get it.

Stay sharp! [There's the sound of someone actually doing the fingerguns wink noise, and then static.

Any messages sent back won't get through, and Zhade isn't there to answer.]

[ A blip of lost time passes right after those words, before every passenger mysteriously wakes alone in their own unfamiliar room. The style of decor resembles that of the Marsiva's Hospitality Deck, if any passengers should remember what that's like. It sounds and smells the same as the host ship as well, all clean and chrome.

Welcome back to the Marsiva, dear passengers. It's time for round three of calibrations. ]

[ This mingle will cover all non-calibration room interactions. Please continue to come back to it for the duration of the plot! You are, of course, free to post any other mingles/posts/etc. that you'd like. ]

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They gotta amuse themselves somehow, right? Either that or they knew if they didn't, I'd spend my entire time here setting shit on fire or trying to transmute the walls into, fuckin' I dunno, sausage or whatever.

[Not that it would have worked. Nothing seems to work here when it comes to damaging the Marsiva and it doesn't exactly make calm his nerves any. He still remembers Thor talking about attacking this place before, the feeling and sight of something living inside it.]

Probably wanted to keep me distracted. And it's working.

[He motions to the poor sap trying to slap the sphere into submission.]

This shit is hilarious.

Fair. That's probably why they didn't give me components- most of my spells are for blowing stuff up.

[There's a few she can piece together with what's available here, and others that don't require components at all, but for the most part she's empty-handed. Not even her silly spoon focus. It suuuucks.]

Yeah, s'what you get for being a fuckin' powerhouse, you dumbass.

[Taako smirks and fiddles with the ends of his hair. Time to trim it up, he thinks. The shampoo here is shit and he's going to start getting split ends soon.]

Taako went and made them think I'm stupid, so what's the harm in giving me a few components here and there, right? Worst that can happen is I'll blow myself up again and that was probably amusing as fuck for them.

Yeah, yeah. One of these days we'll face off against something really dangerous, and you'll be glad you've got a fuckin' powerhouse on your side.

[She sticks her tongue out, still staring down that grumpy gus at the sphere who is obviously getting suspicious of them.]

Wouldn't be the first time I got my ass saved by a woman.

[Honestly, it's the only reason he's probably alive right now. If it wasn't for the pattern of smart, savvy women showing up, he and the rest of the chucklehead squad would have died six or seven times over.

He notices the guy from across the room and can't help but grin, giving them a wink which turns their entire face scarlet.]

And Taako's toooootally fine with that. You're more than welcome to do all the heavy magical lifting.

[Ooh, things are heating up. She breaks her gaze away to check for where the quickest escape route is, in case they end up with a lynch mob before the last Pussycat sings. She wants to at least stay until the song switches over (and back), so... maybe she'll just go back to writing down that spell instead of riling people up. It shouldn't be that much longer, right...? not that she's been counting how many times it's played.]

Don't get too cozy. I'm not about to let you get away with sitting pretty and doing nothing. You've gotta carry your weight!

Good thing I'm light and airy then. Don't have to carry too much.

[Except for the myriad of objects that he likes to adorn himself with. He's been eying that stupid sword at the Fantasy Costco the same as Magnus and Merle, but for completely different reasons. It would look totally rad on his back and make him look like a badass even if he can't lift the damn thing.

He notices how Lup goes back to writing and Taako distracts himself from the angry people across the room by inspecting his nails. Not quite as effective and probably just makes them more angry, but it's better than pulling out the only book he owns and leafing through it.]

So how many people do you think are going to lose their absolute shit in about...oh...seven minutes?

[That's just enough time for this playthrough of Pussycat to end and the alternate song to finish before it all begins again.]

[The change of music makes her look up, another smile creeping across her lips as she watches the reactions of the people around them- first surprise, then relief, as they begin to return to whatever they were doing before the repetition distracted them. She gives it a minute and then goes to finish the spell- she'll look up when it sounds like the new song is winding down.]

Dear gods and goddesses of the universe who definitely have better things to do: please, please let it be all of them. I want to see this whole room go sideways.

[Ah yes...the poor little lambs. They all go back to their former activities, silently rejoicing in the simple pleasure of not hearing "WHOOOA WHOOOA" blaring over and over. The new song isn't exactly a monumental musical masterpiece, but it hardly matters to everyone here.

He's glad he maxed the volume out now as he watches people settle and go back to their earlier routines.]

I hope you got an exit strategy, because I sure do, and they already suspect it's us.

[She offers no response, just scribbling quietly and furiously for another few moments. It's not like there's a lot to this particular spell - it's low demand, doesn't even require concentration or components - but she wants to make sure he gets all the details before the song changes, the reason for which should become clear when she at last finishes and passes the sheet of paper over to him, the title Seeming and a full description transcribed upon it.]

Weeeeell, there is this one spell where you can completely change what you and your friends look like.

[It's hasty, but it's there and Taako takes a moment to study it. He's only a few minutes to look it over, but it's not so hard - a beefed up version of Disguise Self honestly, but extended to people he can see and target. Handy. A lot better than him casting Mislead and leaving Lup in the dust, or Blinking out while she had no spell components. This one, thankfully, doesn't require any components and so he nods to her.]

Niiiice. So you wanna cast it or should I, kemosabe? 'Cause I dunno if I got it in me to memorize this before the song ends in uh...

[He mimes checking his wrist bracer like it's a watch.]

About another minute and a half.

Sure, I can cover it. First one's free.

[She tucks her spellbook back at her belt, leaning forward in her seat. She's ready to vault over the back of the couch and out of sight the moment it becomes necessary, lest their cranky critics see two people sitting in the exact same spot and assume it's still them. Though moving seats after the change would probably be good, too.]

Who'd you like to change into? Paint me a visual.

[He wishes he could go buckwild with this, but seeing how this place is kind of a closed microcosm of people, he has to think of someone who they all know or it'll be obvious he doesn't belong. Can't reuse the dullard he'd been when he and Kravitz had stolen the jewelry from the ice planet castle. Can't change himself into Kravitz either because somehow people knew that he was associated with Taako.

So?

Taako smirks and starts to describe.]

Let's see if you can guess. Elven, got some facial markings, white hair, basically always trying to one-up Eeyore, is starting to realize that there is food beyond reconstituted dried vegetables.

[She quirks a brow as he describes his request, and barely before he gets to the end she lets loose a burst of laughter, hastily clapping a hand over her mouth before it draws too much attention. His choice is unmistakable.]

Of course. It's perfect! And that makes my choice easier, too. Alright, hold on to your butt.

[She pushes off the floor and vaults herself over the back of the couch, muttering under her breath and gesturing with a hand as she disappears behind it. Arcane energy flares up around them, and in a matter of seconds the spell is cast. Taako finds himself suddenly looking exactly like Haggar from head to toe, with the outfit resembling one of the less miserly ones she'd been wearing recently, though more grim than Taako's usual attire.

And then the spitting image of Loki pops up from behind the couch, leaning over the back of it, wearing some fancy fitted green ensemble and a smug smile.]

Well. How fortuitous to meet you here, crewmate of mine. It is I, your captain.

[It's a pretty decent rendition of his accent, though the voice is pitched higher than normal. Illusions can't really fix that part.]

[He snickers when Lup disappears and notices the change in his appearance, shifting over on the seat and standing up. Makes it look like he's just come upon an empty place. He hunches over like Haggar usually does and pulls the hood of the cloak up. It's easier to pretend to be her when people can't see him trying his damnedest not to grin.

When Lup pops back up, he almost snorts in laughter though - it's hard not to.

Fortuitous?? Seriously, Lup?

He's trying his best not to laugh here!

It takes him a minute to keep his shit together, and then he inclines his head slightly and tries his hand at Haggar's voice. The inflection isn't great, but at least he has the octave range right.]

Indeed, Captain. I had not noticed you there. Behind the couch. Are you also--

[Shit, what's the word?]

Vexed by the current musical selection?

Oh yes indeed, quite vexed. Incredibly vexed. Vexatiously so.

[Her smug smile vanishes as she feigns an expression that is perfectly balanced between indifference and mild annoyance. As a god might look upon a mortal, perhaps!]

If only my incredibly ancient magics were strong enough to banish that powerful sphere, I could free us from this... aural torment.

[Fuck it's so hard not to laugh. They're both amazing at this and absolutely the worst.]

Unfortunately, I can only use telekinesis and it is unable to break through the barrier. It's-- It is quite regrettable.

At least we are not alone in our suffering, however.

[Because at that moment? The song changes back and a tangible shudder of horror ripples through the room as WHAT'S NEW PUSSYCAT starts screaming from the speakers.]

[Gods, it is so hard to keep a straight face- especially with the combination of Taako's Haggar impression and the sudden realization of oh no, not again falling upon the rest of the room. She lifts a hand to scratch idly at her nose while she wrestles with a wild grin. Some folks are already looking around for the mysteriously vanished elves, too.]

Oh, yes. Misery does love company, after all. Such a shame we appear to be nailed to the floor and incapable of leaving the room.

Perhaps this is what they call "hell." We are in a hell of their making.

[People are looking around for them now, but only seeing two disapproving parental figure where Taako and Lup once were. There's a few who stare a little longer, but the chaos of people going after the resilient sphere eventually distracts them.]

I have tried to discern the source of how we are cursed to remain here, but I am unable. We must suffer with the rest of these lot.

Whoever "they" might be. Those devious, mysterious geniuses who seem to have wandered off before the return of that terrible tormenting song...

[She goes back to staring at one of the dissenters, this time looking confused and disinterested instead of smug. Just who do you think you're staring at, stranger? She had nothing to do with this, of course...!]

Indeed. Whoever "they" might be, they must be magical geniuses beyond even our prowess.

[No one seems to be looking at Haggar, but it could be because Taako's managed to outfit his face with a pretty impressive scowl. It's close to how Haggar usually looks though, so most people only really give "her" a glance before looking away. The benefit of the space witch's reputation, he guesses.]

I wonder where they absconded to.

It's a mystery just begging to be solved, isn't it? But I have much better things to do, because I'm so very important.

[Lup feigns examining her nails (very busily) while keeping one eye on the crowd. They're back to poking at the sphere, getting rowdy again.]

Any guesses on how long that'll last?

Another nine minutes at the least.

[What a mystery! How could Haggar know such a thing? It's crazy!

He bites his lip to keep from laughing as he watches people bang on the sphere. He's glad he attached it to the panel itself so it can't get pushed around at all.]

But I have no vested interest in solving mysteries. I am a...lab assistant? Not a detective. I will leave that to the mob.

[And take his time watching them lose their collective minds.]

Of course, of course. And I'm a... captain.

[She literally has no idea what Loki's augment is, shit. Shaking it off with a casual shrug, she raises her voice, aiming it towards the rest of the room.]

Have you tried hitting it with a chair? That may yet work. Brute force is surely your best bet.

[Honestly? Taako lives on that ship and has no idea what anyone's augments are except his own and Haggar's. And he only knows Haggar's because she practically lives in the lab like a grouchier, less death crime-y Lucas.

Someone takes note of Loki's suggestion though and throws a chair at the sphere. The thing rebounds in an arc through the air, barely missing the head of the one who threw it, before skittering off across the floor. Meanwhile, the song keeps going on, not noticing a thing.

Pussycat, Pussycat, I love you
Yes, I do!
You and your pussycat nose!

Taako turns his laughter into a casual shrug as they look back at them again.]

Perhaps you need something bigger. You could try the couches or tables.

Edited 2019-02-28 02:13 (UTC)

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