driftfleet | Tourist ROAD TRIP (mingle)

[He'll glance up, offering a nod of greeting, before turning his gaze back to his book, squinting at it a little. ]

I suppose. It is one Varric gave me. It is filled with just simple stories, truthfully.

Mind if I sit?

[ after she gets something to snack on ]

Sometimes the simplest ones are the most powerful.

[He'll gesture to the seat nearby. ]

Feel free. And honestly, he picked the simple ones to help me with my reading. Easier words. It takes me far too long to get through even a page of one of the tomes we have back home.

Are you a recent learner or just like to take your time?

A recent learner. It has been a few years, admittedly, but recent enough.

[He gives a soft shrug. It is what it is, there's still a touch of bitterness in his tone, but he can do nothing about it now but learn, try to get better, to go against that part of his previous life. Still, he likes Kara enough that he's willing to talk about it, so.]

Slaves are not permitted to read. It took getting my freedom for me to be able to begin to learn.

[ she can try to school her reaction, but it's a lot to take in! so she looks a little surprised, but tries to focus on the positives ]

It's incredible that you even tackled learning it. It can be harder for adults, with humans, anyway.

Can I ask how you gained your freedom?

Thank you, it was just something I wished to do. I can honestly say I enjoy what reading I am capable of.

[It's not a story he is willing to tell anyone. Luckily for Kara, she's levelled enough in friendship for him to be willing to tell her. Lucky, lucky her. ]

Certainly. It's not a pleasant story, but I do not mind telling it. [A pause, it helps to explain the setting, he knows. Not everyone is from Thedas and a little history lesson is always helpful.] I come from a country called Tevinter, it has long been at war with the Qunari, a people who settled in what was Tevinter land. Many people of Tevinter join in the fight, and at one point, my master deigned to do so as well; taking me with him. I was his bodyguard, his living weapon, he went nowhere without me by his side.

[So he did all the fighting, Danarius did very little. ]

[ she listens intently. she'd known of species who had kept slaves, humans among them, but it was still a difficult concept for her to grasp ]

So, you must be quite an accomplished fighter.

In part.

[He raises one hand, the white markings on it suddenly glowing an ethereal blue. ]

This is lyrium. It's a powerful magical mineral... I suppose you would call it a power source, like a battery. It is also very toxic. Danarius, my former master, wished to create a living weapon like no other. So he had the lyrium grafted onto my skin. It gives me some...unusual battle capabilities.

Regardless, he spent a lot of money on making me what I am, and was never going to just allow me to leave. I was an investment. An experiment.

[ she pulls a face, mostly because Fenris is clearly a person ]

Does the toxicity affect you?

It causes me pain on occasion, and I have strange, unsettling dreams. [Memories. He knows they are probably memories. ] The process made me lose my memories of my life before it. Sometimes I have flashes, but that is all.

[He shrugs, the lyrium fading back to white again. ]

But no, I do not show the signs of those who usually die from lyrium poisoning. I do not know why, or if it will remain so for the rest of my days or not.

[He's always just sort of accepted that one day, it might catch up with him and kill him. He doesn't much mind. At least he would die free.]

Well, I hope you stay safe.

So, you were in battle.

[That gets a brief flicker of a smile. ] Thank you.

Hm. The Qunari had the advantage, and the party had to leave. The escape ship did not have enough room for a slave, though, and Danarius was force to leave me behind. He was enraged, but injured, he had to go.

[What Fenris doesn't admit is how terrified he was when that happened. This part of the story is left for people like Koala. Slaves themselves, people who understand the mentality that is forced upon them, what it turns them into. ]

I was injured too, but was found by a band of Fog Warriors, a fraction of Qunari who do not follow the doctrines of their people. They patched me up, taught me what it meant to be free...or at least the beginnings of it. I was content there, until Danarius came to collect me.

[ she's getting a little irritated on Fenris' behalf. you can't just come and claim someone after making everyone else deal with their care ]

Oh, sure, show up after all of the hard taking-care-of-you work is done. Tell me you didn't go with him.

[Danarius was the biigest dickbag going, this is a lesson for her in that. ]

I-

When he arrived, I thought it was inevitable. I had learned the beginnings of freedom, but learning to see yourself as something other than property takes a long time. When he came back, the Fog Warriors refused to let him take me, they were prepared to give their lives for mine.

...So he ordered me to kill them. And I did. Every last one of them.

[His fingers twitch, his brow furrows. He's angry at himself, for failing them for being a dog on a leash one last time.]

After that I just- couldn't. I saw their bodies, and I ran.

[ she's surprised, and upset. she didn't really expect it to go that direction, but she knows about Stockholm Syndrome—this has to be related, right? she really doesn't want to make this about her, though. she didn't live through it. so, she'll reach an arm out across the table and attempt to lay a hand gently over his. She'll retract if he reacts strongly, but she wants to try to be comforting, waiting to hear more ]

[He tenses a little, but allows the touch, it's not much to most people, but to Fenris, it means a lot. Allowing anyone to touch him is a mark of trust, not many get the honour. Not wihtout dying horribly right after, anyway. ]

I kept running until I made it to the city of Kirkwall, far, far away from Tevinter. There, I met Hawke- a different one to the Hawkes that have appeared in the Fleet, and joined his group. It was there I truly learned what it meant to be free. To have friends, something like a family. To be my own person.

[ she does really appreciate him allowing her touch, and keeps a light hand on him ]

You've been through so much, and you still have so much drive and interest in the universe. It's incredible. We're really lucky to have you on board. For someone to go through so much and still have kindness within them is truly admirable.

[For a moment, he looks surprised, before it gives way to a faint sort of amusement. ]

Kindness is not generally a term people use when describing me. Still, it is what it is. I had to learn to survive or let it devour me. For a long time it did, but seeking revenge against those who've wronged you does little to make you feel better. It's far wiser to continue living in spite of it, of them.

[ she gives his arm a little squeeze and then pulls her hand back so she can take a sip of her drink ]

Well, you've been kind to me, and kind to yourself, to allow yourself a life despite what's happened. I've seen people go down the path of revenge, and it's consumed them. That's not kindness.

It did consume me. I simply...ran out of people to be angry at over it. I killed those that came after me, including Danarius. Eventually, the only person left to be angry at was myself...I was fortunate enough that I had my friends to pull me back from that. I doubt I would have done it alone.

Friends are very good at that.

[That gets a chuckle out of him. ]

That they are. Mine were especially veracious about it. I'm glad for that.

How about you? Do you have friends like that? Who would look out for you?

I do, and they mean more to me than just about anything. I mean, you know Winn. He's doing everything he can here to make sure I'm okay. At home, besides him, I have my sister Alex. I was adopted by her family when I was 13, but we're as close as any sisters. She has put herself in harm's way for me more than once, and even ended up doing her job so she could help protect me. She and her mother have been just wonderful to me. There's James, and Director Henshaw, who seems like he disapproves a lot but really has my best interest in mind. And of course my cousin, Kal-El, even though it's my job to protect him first and foremost.

That's a lot of people. [Fenris has a few himself, of course, but Kara still has so many, it's good to hear. ]

You are most fortunate to have them, and I am sure they feel likewise to have you.

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