driftfleet | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Who: Itty Bitty Obi-Wan + You
Broadcast: Y
Action: SS Huntress
When: Now

[ Video ]

[ The feed shakes for a few minutes before it centers on a young thirteen year old boy. He has the trademark padawan braid and robes as he sits on his knees in front of the camera. His expression is quiet and muted, though it seems like he hasn't had much sleep. His eyes are red-rimmed and tired. ]

Hello. If you could tell me if this ship is heading to Coruscant, I would be grateful. If not, I'd be happy to earn my way there through any duties you deem necessary.

[ He hesitates, pausing for far too long, biting on his lip. ] And if you -- you have seen Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn.

Thank you.

[ Action ]

[ Obi-Wan weaves himself through the ship, his shoulders hunched and his saber in a tight white-knuckled grip. Surely Qui-Gon wouldn't have left him here . . . not after coming back. Not after their discussion.

Then again, what rights did Obi-Wan even possess?

He tugs the hood over his face and keeps a wary eye on everyone who came close. This was a strange vessel and their responses got even more confusing. Best to keep to himself until he got to Coruscant. ]

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[ He digs his fingers into his knees. ]

No. That wasn't what was hard. What -- What was hard is -- is that she died. In my arms. I felt her go cold.

Oh youngling. [ Maglor reaches across to lay his hand across one of Obi-Wan's ]

I am so sorry - none should ever have to know that grief, especially not so young.

[ He shakes his head, furious tears prickling his eyes. ]

I was so close and I couldn't even stop it. If I had been more of a Jedi, I could have.

[ He moves to kneel before him, reaching up to brush away the tears ]

I do not know what the tale that brings you so much grief is, in full - but youngling, we cannot save everyone, and sometimes, no matter what we do, we cannot save even those closest to us. I am sure, you tried your best. And in the end, that is all any of us can do.

[ Obi-Wan knows this, deep down. It's an old lesson of the Jedi. There is no death, there is only the Force. But it does little to ease the knot of grief tied in his chest. ]

I . . . really liked her.

[ Maglor does not move from his position, listening quietly. He nods sadly ]

It always hurts more when it is someone dear to us. Would it help to speak of it?

I don't know. I told Master Qui-Gon because I had to.

And how did your master react?

Master Qui-Gon is a Jedi.

[ He didn't resent his Master. Or blame him. It is their way. ] He keeps his emotions under control.

Ah, I see - but I think he must have said something to you, no? Control does not mean they do not exist, after all - only that one must manage them appropriately.

He said . . . it wasn't my fault.

[ It was a difficult time. He knew Qui-Gon didn't trust him, didn't know what to do with him. Obi-Wan had lost his way. ]

[ A nod ] And does your master lie?

[ He considers this before shaking his head. ]

No.

But it is hard to accept, eh? But consider this - your Master is both the older and more experienced of the two of you, and from what I understand, he is a reasonable man, valuing a calm head, who does not lie. Therefore, if he told you that it was not your fault, it stands to reason that it is so, even though the pain is hard to see through.

Hold on to that thought - for I think your Master you will find more forgiving than you might suspect.

[ He nods. ]

I . . . I understand.

[ Maglor's smile is sympathetic ]

Remember also - it is alright to hurt. It is alright to grieve. Those things are natural, and right. It is a part of the process, when you lose one you love. But you cannot allow them to dictate your path, for down that way lies madness.

I don't know if he'll take me back. He said he'll let me return to the Temple and make my case . . . but I don't think he trusts me anymore.

I hurt his feelings.

[ Maglor yields to the instinct to reach up and ruffle Obi-Wan's hair a little. ]

Maybe so. But he sounds a very fair man, and we all of us make mistakes. Why should he not give you another chance? That is what being a Master is for, after all. To help your students to pick themselves up, and try again. To learn from their mistakes.

[ He huffs, resisting the urge to pat down his hair. ]

Master Qui-Gon lost an apprentice to the Dark. He never got over it.

It hurts, when one you trust, turns against you - I can understand why he would be upset. But you are not doing so, are you? To control ones emotions, one needs to understand them - and that means being able to look past your own biases. You did your best. You meant no harm. I think he will see that.

[ He nods finally. Master Qui-Gon was wise . . . and he did choose Obi-Wan in the end. Maybe . . . maybe he'll forgive Obi-Wan and choose him again. ]

[ Maglor's smile is wryly understanding, but he gets up to pick up his harp again ]

There, but enough of such gloomy talk, I think. Would you like to hear more music?

. . . Okay. How much music do you know?

Quite a lot, actually, but alas! Nothing from Corsucant, and probably nothing from your home world, either.

Coruscant isn't my home world . . . at least I don't think it is. I was only taken there when I was found to be force-sensitive.

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